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Kirkstall Cunt Hive

Started by Shoulders?-Stomach!, January 02, 2021, 01:52:11 PM

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Shoulders?-Stomach!

This morning we enjoyed a good 3 hours of snow, some heavy, some light, but it began to stick and as of an hour ago there was some pristine powder out there. Because I'm one of those infantilised adults I love snow and it reminds me of the days, the days that are gone, like so much dog turd of yore.

I went for a walk down the hill to the canal which had frozen over in parts and received a dusting of snow over the patches of ice. That's my favourite part, when the snow seems to be suspended in patches over the water, sometimes with the footprints of birds and unruly dogs.

A little further along past the old brewery (now terribly poorly rated student accommodation) there are some seriously big canalside houses in Yorkshire stone. Expansive gardens, vast patios you could host post-war summits on. Around here, probably a million or more in value.

One of these has erected permanent signage, around 13-14 different signs intended for the viewing of those passing on the canal towpath. Large signs, each around 6 feet in length with bold blue writing on. These signs all display self-help idioms, proverbs, mottos in some examples...outright hectoring.

Here are some examples:

Quote"You become what you feed your mind"

Quote"Hurting someone with the truth is better than making them happy with a lie"

Quote"Not everything that is understood can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is understood"

Quote"EVERY TEST IN OUR LIFE MAKES US BITTER OR BETTER, EVERY PROBLEM COMES TO MAKE US OR BREAK US. CHOICE IS OURS, BECOME VICTIM OR VICTORIOUS"

Quote"IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE STRESS, YOU CAN'T HANDLE SUCCESS"

Quote"My father would often tell me, 'do good and you will see good. Do bad and you will see bad'. He wasn't wrong"

Quote"We only live once. WRONG. We only die once. We live everyday!!"

Quote"Accept that you are not important to some people and move on"

Why do they want people to see all this?

It comes across as tragically insecure somehow to have a level of comfort and security most people would dream and still project all this self-help crap at others, who are actually fine with jogging, cycling, walking the dog, or having a ramble out to the country. It comes across as the worst smug cuntery imaginable. Worse even than street preaching.

If you're extremely wealthy or privileged then it's fairly easy to turn offer a load of 'advice' that boils down to "Be more like me". One of the most common mentalities of people of that status is convincing themselves they earned it all off their own back, and didn't have any good fortune or privilege along the way.

It's bad enough having to occasionally rub shoulders with people like that, but can't we at least be granted the dignity of not having it bellowed at us? When you post this in huge expensive signs along your grounds (and we'll call them grounds because this is across about 100 metres) it risks coming across like you're a bunch of smug fucking know-it-all cunts rubbing our noses in it. The idea of projecting the last one above to thousands of passers by is demented.

Kirkstall Cunt Hive: put them in the ground

Janie Jones

According to Reddit it's not a private house, it's an ad agency called Rejuvenate. I don't know how to post that Limmy meme but it got a reaction outta ye, ye cannae deny that.

touchingcloth

If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve grave x

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Janie Jones on January 02, 2021, 02:01:43 PM
According to Reddit it's not a private house, it's an ad agency called Rejuvenate. I don't know how to post that Limmy meme but it got a reaction outta ye, ye cannae deny that.

BOOM

That's the thread and my whole life detonated



P.S It's got a play area in the garden, dogs running around, it's next to other private houses, seemed legit. Next time I will pry on google, I was far too prim and proper and thought this was enough of an invasion of their privacy

bgmnts

QuoteYou become what you feed your mind

I am become porn, the destroyer of keyboards.

Fambo Number Mive

I still wonder why they put those signs up. I guess so people try and find out more about the mysterious ad agency but to be honest the phrases on those signs seem like the sort of thing you find on signs for hanging in your kitchen in seafront souvenir shops, not very creative. For all the money that costs, I wonder how many extra clients it gets them.

If an ad agency wanted to stand out, the thread title would be a far better name, although it might have mixed results.

Fambo Number Mive

Quote"Not everything that is understood can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is understood"

Yes. And? Although I'm not sure that's true, you can not understand something and change it for the worse due to a lack of understanding.

QuoteEVERY TEST IN OUR LIFE MAKES US BITTER OR BETTER, EVERY PROBLEM COMES TO MAKE US OR BREAK US. CHOICE IS OURS, BECOME VICTIM OR VICTORIOUS

Is COVID making us bitter or better? If someone spills their tea on the carpet, does that make them or break them when they try to figure our how to get it out?

Quote"IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE STRESS, YOU CAN'T HANDLE SUCCESS"

Depends how you define success. Is not having to put up with stress a kind of success?

Surprised no-one has added some of their own.

The Dog

QuoteNot everything that is understood can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is understood

Used to believe this but then I changed my mind.

Blue Jam

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on January 02, 2021, 01:52:11 PM
A little further along past the old brewery (now terribly poorly rated student accommodation)

I bet that really boils your piss doesn't it Shoulders. Your dream home, bought by someone who didn't deserve it and who then proceeded to fuck it up.

Yeah, that's how I feel about it too. Bastards. Which brewery was it?

Blue Jam

[tag]Live, Laugh, GRAVE[/tag]

sirhenry

[tag]Live, Laugh, Kill Again[/tag]

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Quote from: Blue Jam on January 02, 2021, 02:43:40 PM
I bet that really boils your piss doesn't it Shoulders. Your dream home, bought by someone who didn't deserve it and who then proceeded to fuck it up.

Yeah, that's how I feel about it too. Bastards. Which brewery was it?

Kirkstall Brewery

idunnosomename

Cistercian abbey "disappointed" by assessment

Icehaven

Quote from: Janie Jones on January 02, 2021, 02:01:43 PM
According to Reddit it's not a private house, it's an ad agency called Rejuvenate. I don't know how to post that Limmy meme but it got a reaction outta ye, ye cannae deny that.

I was going to suggest it could be the base of some sub-Scientology cult, so I wasn't too far off.

JesusAndYourBush

How come the signs haven't been graffiti'd yet?  Or are they protected by a fence/barbed wire/etc.

king_tubby

You'd have to swim the canal. Don't fancy getting that rat piss disease, myself.

And yes, as I cycle by this place on my commute, I always think 'check out this hive of cunts'.

Johnny Yesno

Quote from: The Dog on January 02, 2021, 02:42:20 PM
Used to believe this but then I changed my mind.

This is on a different level to the 'creatives' at the ad agency.

Buelligan

Quote from: king_tubby on January 02, 2021, 04:31:16 PM
And yes, as I cycle by this place on my commute, I always think 'check out this hive of cunts'.

That's the sign that should be erected on those premises by someone.

Put a smaller one underneath saying

QuoteYou cannot change this sign until you understand it, cunt.

Blue Jam

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on January 02, 2021, 03:49:32 PM
Kirkstall Brewery

D'oh... I had assumed it was some massive famous brewery on the scale of McEwan's or something, but now defunct.

Never heard of Kirkstall Brewery- is it these guys, or are they just using the name? Have they revived an old brand, Wrexham Lager style, by using the name for their microbrewery?

https://kirkstallbrewery.com

Some of those beers sound really nice, I could be tempted to order a case. Not cheap though are they? Worth it?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Yeah they are alright, met the dude who brewed Three Swords. Like a lot of Yorkshire breweries, too many boring pales (they literally don't do a single bitter, esb, red ale) and they have tried to segue to doing craft beers with different results.

My favourites of theirs have been Generous George which was like a cask ale version of a nice bitter lager named after a Polish mate of theirs and Herzblut, a cask Altbier which was fucking brilliant.

Blue Jam

"too many boring pales" is a problem with a lot of breweries to be fair. Certainly a lot of breweries here in Scotland, and a lot of American breweries I have checked out. Not much of a pale ale fan myself, I tend to go for a rich and refreshing lager or something dark and interesting, both ends of the spectrum and not much from the middle.

Cheers, I shall keep a look out next time I am round Yorkshire way. Should be in Sheffield in April, fingers crossed...

king_tubby

I like them. I have missed not being able to go in to my local and having a pint of Black Band Porter this winter.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

The Black Rose they did for Brudenell Social Club is terrific, could down a few of those.

'VICTIM or VICTORIOUS'

king_tubby

Don't mention the Brudenell, I'll start crying.

Kankurette


Gulftastic

Quote from: king_tubby on January 02, 2021, 04:31:16 PM
You'd have to swim the canal. Don't fancy getting that rat piss disease, myself.

And yes, as I cycle by this place on my commute, I always think 'check out this hive of cunts'.

I swam in that canal. Back in 80s, mind. In the winter of 81/2 (I think) we skated on it.

Gulftastic

And Kirkstall Brewery pubs are pretty good. If it's summer, try The Bridge. Big back garden by the river. Smashing place for some sunny drinks.

Jasha

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on January 02, 2021, 02:06:27 PM
BOOM

That's the thread and my whole life detonated


You think you suffer now but let us reflect on Our Lords suffering as He agonised over the money lenders

touchingcloth

The house in the OP is owned by a full service digital marketing agency in Leeds. They work with their clients on their digital solutions and their overall digital marketing strategy. They have an in-house team of dedicated people. Who live and breathe web design and web development. Who are passionate about mobile, responsive web design and app development. They support their clients with their content marketing, search marketing and social media marketing. Do you need a video production? Their video team can produce, shoot, edit and distribute on all digital channels.

They're always on the search for new digital challenges.

They are always on the lookout for talented and experienced people to assist the team. They are a creative digital agency in Leeds, Yorkshire with an in-house team of dedicated 'digitypes'! Including digital creative's, web designers and web developers, or perhaps you are more interested in the account or project management side of things? Interested in a career there, check out their vacancies.

the

Yuhp yuhp yuhp yuhp

Quote from: touchingcloth on January 03, 2021, 08:50:50 AMThey're always on the search for new digital challenges.

Such as "Could you pull your finger out of your arsehole?"