Snooker 2021

[Flouncer]

All the old cunts have been resolutely thrashed 3-0. Broken, moribund bodies littering the floor of the Crucible.

Dennis Taylor retires from competitive snooker - he's making a right meal of his retirement speech.

[druss]

One of my favourite frames was Hendry beating White with a highest break of 7 (on the last pot) in the Qualifiers.

Obviously this is an exaggeration but even so I would love to see the frame in question.

[Blue Jam]

In the past week Hendry has gone from commentating at a full-to-capacity Crucible, to playing there to the tinny sound of recorded audience noise. Pure deso.

[BlodwynPig]

I can't believe there hasn't been more enthusiasm on here, for watching a load of old farts struggling to make a 30 break. Shame on you all!

I was watching Judge Wallace last night but lost the will to live.

[Flouncer]

Crucible controversy with Jimmy White and Tony Knowles - Jimmy pretty much had the frame won, with Knowles needing four snookers, then Jimmy fouled whilst addressing the ball on his final shot. Jimmy didn't declare it, but Tony saw it from his seat. Tony told the ref that Jimmy had fouled, and they looked at the tape and found that he was right and awarded him the foul points. This left him needing three snookers but it turned out to be academic as he went in-off the black.

I was watching Judge Wallace last night but lost the will to live.

Haha Blodders, the commentators were just saying what a great match that was.

[BlodwynPig]

I left at 1-0 Wallace, well it was either 1-1 or 2-0, that second frame was tortuous...both players throwing away winning positions. I think it was Wallace wasn't it. 2-0...bed

[Flouncer]

Proper boot-off situation developing between Knowles and White: Jimmy just complained that Tony was moving about in his eyeline. I saw the ref gesture to him once before that so it's obviously not the first time Jimmy has complained about it. Virgo in the commentary says that Jimmy has been staring at Tony. I can see this degenerating into a bareknuckle on the top floor of the multi storey car park around the corner.

[BlodwynPig]

He wasnt playing Knowles? Bbc says he just beat Johnson???

[Flouncer]

Hendry wins the first frame against Big Ig in a single visit with a lovely break - he looked pretty pissed off about not making a century.

He wasnt playing Knowles? Bbc says he just beat Johnson???

It was Ken Doherty who thrashed Joe Johnson, Blodders. Doherty will play David Lilley this evening.

These are the round 1 results:

[BlodwynPig]

Hendry wins the first frame against Big Ig in a single visit with a lovely break - he looked pretty pissed off about not making a century.

It was Ken Doherty who thrashed Joe Johnson, Blodders. Doherty will play David Lilley this evening.

These are the round 1 results:

yes, sorry, it was another BBC cock-up on their snooker front page. I don't have enough bandwidth at the moment to join the action sadly

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Igor KERBSTOMPED Hendry there. Battered, get out of the Crucible, get in your car and fuck off back to your retreat to lose practise frames to a dog, Hendry.

[Blue Jam]

I really should have put a fiver on Big Ig to win this thing outright. Seems like a foregone conclusion.

[Wayman C. McCreery]

Provisional calendar for next season announced: https://wst.tv/2021-22-provisional-calendar/

The format of the Championship League is pure shit, so it looks like the real fun starts in September. I've already got tickets for a day in York for the UKs, and the Champion of Champions in Bolton is dead cheap so I'll probably head over for a day of that.

[Flouncer]

He's got a beautiful length.

[BlodwynPig]

Had to turn off, Morgan constantly nominating a colour even when it was the only colour he could pot was frustrating

[Wayman C. McCreery]

Had to turn off, Morgan constantly nominating a colour even when it was the only colour he could pot was frustrating

It's actually being played at a decent standard (i.e. both players are capable of potting a ball).

[BlodwynPig]

It's actually being played at a decent standard (i.e. both players are capable of potting a ball).

Yes, some nice shots once Morgan had warmed up, but glacial pace, ill watch one of those grim documentaries instead

[DocDaneeka]

IGOR OUT! White actually good when he's in the Seniors, probably the power he feels from being the only over 50 with jet black hair.

[BlodwynPig]

Jimmy fucked it

[Wayman C. McCreery]

Jimmy fucked it

He unfucked it. Feels like they've made the pockets twice as wide to make it easier for these codgers but he's playing really well now.

[Flouncer]

He is starting to cook now - looking confident and up for it. Last year he went 4-0 down to Ken Doherty and ended up winning five on the trot to take the match, so I wasn't as worried as I might have been at 3-0 down (I put a bet on Jimmy when he was the 10-1 outsider; I thought that was a bit shady of the bookies for the defending champion so I stuck a tenner on him).

[Flouncer]

Jimmy levels the match at 3-3, leaving a best of three to determine the winner!

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

They must have shaved off the corners of the pocket as that pink from Lilley seemed to defy geometry. Missed that shot by the width of a fucking ball.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

'Love ha.... Love ha ter death'

Normally you would accept that as a turn of phrase but when a journeyman snooker player says it that is a massive red flag.

[Flouncer]

SHIT! SHIT! VD, VD! WHY DO I BLOODY LOSE EVERYTHING ALWAYS???

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Oh god, the trophy isn't attached to the base properly. Fucking chumps.

[Wayman C. McCreery]

https://twitter.com/markwil147/status/1391506448492924935?s=21

A big step up from tweeting about the Mrs Brown's Boys party food he got from Iceland. Give him another 12 months and he'll be asking for links to Daniel Kitson's Resonance shows.

[Blue Jam]

https://twitter.com/markwil147/status/1391506448492924935?s=21

I saw that earlier. Great typo.

[BlodwynPig]

Bored, any snooker on?

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Now the Seniors are done the final event of the season is the Warburton's National Front Classic in Cap De L'Horta.

Lucky for Ali Carter his groupies 'Carter's Crohn's' are already there having wintered on the Costa Del Mischief.