Post-Brexit fallout - we can't have our cake or eat it

[Fambo Number Mive]

They must get tired of women going "That's my left tit inspected, now do you want to see my right one" and then pointing at their boyfriend.

[JamesTC]

Gonna weigh boobs in metric just to annoy the right.

[imitationleather]

So much of the Weight and Measures Inspector's job these days is sorting out dick size arguments.

[imitationleather]

Come on guys, we've all been in argument about our dick size that has got so heated we've had to call in the Weight and Measures Inspector, right?

[JamesTC]

Measuring your cock in centimetres makes it seem bigger than inches.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Can fully imagine boob inspector is nowhere near as glamorous as it sounds. Bit like how window cleaner is mainly just cleaning windows despite what those 70s advertorials promised.

"Phwoarrrrrr, darlin', you don't get many of these to the pahnd, waheyyyy!!! Also, I'm afraid I've found a lump."

[Better Midlands]

Measuring your cock in centimetres makes it seem bigger than inches.

What a swizz

[Jittlebags]

Measuring your cock in centimetres makes it seem bigger than inches.

That's the type of inflation that all the horny voters like.

[An tSaoi]

I think this new policy will be a failure by any metric. Heh-heh-heh

[steveh]

So Brexit has screwed our energy too:

When the UK exited the EU, it did not address the many issues identified in its own plans, where plans existed. The government ignored the EU Commission papers on the topic which identified in detail what risks existed to energy supply and balancing. It is almost as if the Government thought they could just fix issues as they 'cropped up' after the amateurish leaving agreement. However they did not actually have the agility or energy to do the necessary grunt work. We elected to be outside the EU Internal Energy Market, even though we rely on key aspects of it. So now we have lost significant control over prices, which is being used as an excuse to use coal fired power stations to balance the grid. And yes, that has just happened in the very year of the COP26 summit.

We're paying a lot more than we used to for energy from the EU - up to five times what we used to:

"Now that the GB market has left the EU internal energy market, it has left the day-ahead market coupling arrangements. The IEM day-ahead market coupling process with its implicit allocation of capacity on the interconnectors has meant that power flowed from the continent to the GB market at a much lower price.

"However, with the interconnectors now falling back to explicit auctions, this has resulted in extreme prices for capacity when the GB market is under stress."

And now a fire at the main UK / France interconnect will mean a loss of capacity for importing energy until likely March while current low wind speeds are hitting wind power, some nuclear power is offline for maintenance and gas prices are at a record high and likely to lead to four retail energy companies going bust this coming week.

[Bernice]

Food shortages and rising fuel prices. Nice, good country, global Britain looking fine.

[ajsmith2]

US trade deal FAIL

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-58646017

[Buelligan]

I love the way this gets thrown in casually, everyone forgets Johnson going on and on about how likely a US free trade deal after Brexit might be... everyone forgets that he just helped the US to screw over the French. 

[evilcommiedictator]

Brexit bringing jobs home to good British people Latvian chicken gutters and Polish lorry drivers

5,000 overseas lorry drivers and 5,500 poultry workers will be eligible for three-month UK visas until Christmas Eve

https://www.bbc.com/news/business-58694004

The transport secretary said he did not want to "undercut" British workers but could not stand by while queues formed.

He couldn't stand by while queues form.

As well as allowing more foreign workers, other measures include using Ministry of Defence examiners to increase HGV (heavy goods vehicle) testing capacity, and sending nearly one million letters to drivers who hold an HGV licence, encouraging them back into the industry.

[DrGreggles]

2020: "Fuck off, foreigner!"

September: "PLEASE come back."

Christmas Day: "Fuck off, foreigner!"

[Uncle TechTip]

First thing they should do is demand the 30pc pay rise that was being offered to British people a few weeks ago.

[katzenjammer]

It seems unlikely they're going to be rushing over

Digioia (the head of the European Road Haulers Association) said European driver salaries were generally higher than in Britain; new EU rules had improved working conditions; and billions of euros had been offered to fund parking areas and support companies.
"The UK doesn't have access to any of that," he said. "Tempting European drivers back to the UK when they also have to face the reality of customs and border checks, all the uncertainties of Brexit ... We have to be realistic."
Higher salaries, and perhaps tax incentives, might help in the short term, he said, but "a lot of money is being thrown at this whole problem in Europe right now. There's a level playing field, and none of the Brexit-related hassle".

https://www.theguardian.com/business/2021/sep/25/european-lorry-drivers-will-not-want-to-come-to-uk-warn-haulage-chiefs

[jobotic]

First we have to chuck them out and then they don't want to come back? Ingrates.

[Mrs Wogans lemon drizzle]

How are they supposed to sort accomadation or utilitys/mobile phones/internet etc etc for 3 months?  Dosn't seem realisitic?

[Paul Calf]

It's a sticking plaster though, isn't it? It's not even going to plug the existing gap, let alone the Christmas spike.

As has been said on here before, the structural problem that's massively contributing towards this is the total collapse of cabotage agreements.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cabotage

[buzby]

How are they supposed to sort accomadation or utilitys/mobile phones/internet etc etc for 3 months?  Dosn't seem realisitic?

I have it on good authority that the HGV Visa scheme is for longer than three months. The 'they'll be back home after Christmas' is a bit of spin. It's also already been up and running for a few weeks before yesterday's announcement.

[Mrs Wogans lemon drizzle]

I have it on good authority that the HGV Visa scheme is for longer than three months. The 'they'll be back home after Christmas' is a bit of spin. It's also already been up and running for a few weeks before yesterday's announcement.

That would make far more sense, obviously the government can't be upfront about it as they need to pander to idiots.

[Fambo Number Mive]

@sima_kotecha
EU lorry drivers union says on #r4today "we will not go back to #England to help them get out of the shit they created themselves". Yes he said shit.

Why would anyone, unless they were truly desperate, want to go back to a country which has used them as a scapegoat for their own problems for the past decade and which has ramped up the shitting on people from other European countries since 2016. I can't imagine there will be many takers for temporary visas to drive lorries around plague island.

[EOLAN]

I guess saying shit on R4 is still a bit of a deal, but I am more interested if he actually said hashtag-England.

[imitationleather]

Was just in Marks and Spencer and it looked...



Spacious.

[chveik]

i thought the expression was "You can't have your cake and eat it"??

[Buelligan]

It is.  Brexit has taken away both options.

[David Pielingtonburygrot]

Was just in Marks and Spencer and it looked...



Spacious.

They should change their tagline to "It's not even food".

[Jerzy Bondov]

Fucking EU won't even let us have shelves now is it, why can't we make good old fashioned British shelves that's what I want to know

[Better Midlands]