Author Topic: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy  (Read 1847 times)

Fambo Number Mive

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Another argument against bearing arms - medics stretched by COVID had to spend time dealing with the gunshot wound "flaunting a concealed handgun" in the supermarket.

https://www.oregonlive.com/news/2020/09/oregon-man-shoots-self-in-groin-while-showing-off-gun-in-supermarket-checkout-line-cops-say.html

I'm sure the shoppers of Lincoln City were delighted that someone who seems to need a refresher on how to handle a firearm safely was waving a gun around.


Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #1 on: January 08, 2021, 12:07:30 PM »
Someone my cousin went to school with, managed to accidentally drill through his cock.

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #2 on: January 08, 2021, 12:15:46 PM »
Thread titles that sound like rhyming couplets from an adult themed Rupert the Bear story.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #3 on: January 08, 2021, 12:16:44 PM »
Someone my cousin went to school with, managed to accidentally drill through his cock.

Did they manage to repair it enough so it works for weeing and shagging now?

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #4 on: January 08, 2021, 12:36:56 PM »
Someone my cousin went to school with, managed to accidentally drill through his cock.
Send the vid

Dex Sawash

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2021, 12:43:34 PM »
Yet again, CaB reveals my porn searches

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #6 on: January 08, 2021, 01:03:03 PM »
Confucius says...

Utter Shit

  • Snotty Bumstead
Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #7 on: January 08, 2021, 01:08:08 PM »
Another argument against bearing arms

Seems like throwing the baby out with the bathwater, couldn't we just take the gun away from him?

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #8 on: January 08, 2021, 01:10:03 PM »
Thread titles that sound like rhyming couplets from an adult themed Rupert the Bear story.

It reminds me of the ones you used to get as page headers in The Beano or The Dandy.

Or more resonant in this instance, Oor Wullie.

jenna appleseed

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #9 on: January 08, 2021, 05:44:58 PM »
Thread titles that sound like rhyming couplets from an adult themed Rupert the Bear story.

or captions to the picture book adaption of that new Danish children's tv series.

Rizla

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2021, 05:49:21 PM »
Someone my cousin went to school with, managed to accidentally drill through his cock.
Doctor - (hands over note) I want you to call this person.
Cobb's cousin's schoolmate - Oh, is he a specialist?
Doctor - No, he's a clarinet player, he'll teach you how to hold it.


Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2021, 10:14:14 PM »
Any shit poets out there might like to note that the groin-shooter's gun was a Glock (which rhymes with cock)

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2021, 10:16:22 PM »
Any shit poets out there might like to note that the groin-shooter's gun was a Glock (which rhymes with cock)

where's MF DOOM when you need him

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2021, 10:19:30 PM »
There once was a man called Nick
Who was more than a little thick
He got out his Glock
Nearly blew off his cock
While acting like a prick

Replies From View

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #14 on: January 08, 2021, 10:19:48 PM »
Someone my cousin went to school with, managed to accidentally drill through his cock.

Was it one of those outcomes where he could put his finger over his urethra and piss through the new blowhole?

There was a kid at our school who used to whistle out of his eyes.  I’d have loved it if this cousin’s friend of yours then always instantly rocked up with his cock out, index finger already prepped over his urethra.

jenna appleseed

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #15 on: January 08, 2021, 10:56:04 PM »
He could literally play the skin flute.

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #16 on: January 08, 2021, 11:12:15 PM »
Back in the day when I wanted to do a Harry Shearer style "funny current events" podcast I was going to do a "stupid gun incidents" segment, most of which would have come from here:
https://twitter.com/Well_Regulated_

Such as
Quote
A member of our well regulated militia shoots at targets with no backstop and towards another person’s property. He shoots a man in the leg who was hiking on that property.
Quote
A member of our well regulated militia handles a loaded gun while caring for her children (a 4 year old and a 1 month old). She shoots herself in the arm and out a window.
Quote
A member of our well regulated militia leaves a loaded gun accessible to a 4 year old boy. The boy finds the gun in the home and shoots himself. He doesn't survive.

chveik

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #17 on: January 08, 2021, 11:22:15 PM »
that would've been a right laugh

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #18 on: January 09, 2021, 04:07:29 PM »
or captions to the picture book adaption of that new Danish children's tv series.

Rupåert “the Bear”?


bgmnts

  • Depressed to the point of poisonous toxicity.
Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #19 on: January 09, 2021, 06:42:51 PM »
It would be okay to laugh yourself silly right in his face just after he gunned himself right?

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #20 on: January 10, 2021, 06:30:57 AM »
Reading thst twitter feed and it seems obvious but why would you clean a firearm WHILE IT IS LOADED.  Is it laziness?

Shit Good Nose

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #21 on: January 10, 2021, 10:59:02 PM »
Reading thst twitter feed and it seems obvious but why would you clean a firearm WHILE IT IS LOADED.  Is it laziness?

Pretty much.  A gun going off whilst it's being cleaned accounts for a lot of injuries and accidental deaths, the latter of which will include the occasional genuinely accidental manslaughter (although it's almost certainly also been used as an excuse to cover up intentional murder, for sure).  You have to remember that in the States practically ANY adult can buy a gun.  And there are an awful lot of dim bulbs over there who buy them.

Being slightly and objectively fair, I suppose there would also be a small percentage of forgetting the gun is loaded .

Zetetic

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #22 on: January 10, 2021, 11:09:26 PM »
You have to remember that in the States practically ANY adult can buy a gun.
Bit of an aside, but it's worth remembering that actually - despite all the rhetoric - over 23 million adults in the US are prohibited from owning a gun.

Mostly made of up of:
10 million "illegal aliens"
6.4 million mental health
4.6 million done a crime with a long enough jail sentence

Which is a pretty good way of both having a constitutional right to bear arms and then denying it to a lot of black and Hispanic people.

(Particularly if your database is prone to false matches of personal details.)

Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #23 on: January 10, 2021, 11:18:56 PM »
Reading thst twitter feed and it seems obvious but why would you clean a firearm WHILE IT IS LOADED.  Is it laziness?

It's like cleaning your bike while you ride it!

Shit Good Nose

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #24 on: January 10, 2021, 11:20:51 PM »
Bit of an aside, but it's worth remembering that actually - despite all the rhetoric - over 23 million adults in the US are prohibited from owning a gun.

Mostly made of up of:
10 million "illegal aliens"
6.4 million mental health
4.6 million done a crime with a long enough jail sentence

Which is a pretty good way of both having a constitutional right to bear arms and then denying it to a lot of black and Hispanic people.

(Particularly if your database is prone to false matches of personal details.)

Yeah, but there's, what, 350million people in the States?  Even taking children out of the equation, the equivalent over here would still be one psychotic brown skinned person the locals "lovingly" refer to as Mental Blackjack.

Plus, a huge chunk of those people would still have a gun anyway I expect.

Zetetic

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #25 on: January 10, 2021, 11:24:28 PM »
It's getting close to one in ten of the adult population.

That seems quite a substantial proportion to deny a supposed "fundamental right".

I don't think your characterisation of people who end up on the mental health bit of NICS as "psychotic" is particularly accurate or helpful, noting that US mental health providers have a significant history of criminally unnecessary forced admission (as ever with racial biases). (That's not my opinion, that's judgements of the DoJ in recent years.)

Quote
Plus, a huge chunk of those people would still have a gun anyway I expect.
Or at least could obtain one if they really wanted. (Although this is true in quite a lot countries, isn't it? The UK remains unusual in how difficult it is to obtain guns.)

Shit Good Nose

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #26 on: January 10, 2021, 11:31:11 PM »
It's getting close to one in ten of the adult population.

I don't think your characterisation of people who end up on the mental health bit of NICS as "psychotic" is particularly accurate or helpful, noting that US mental health providers have a significant history of criminally unnecessary forced admission (as ever with a racial providers). (That's not my opinion, that's judgements of the DoJ in recent years.)
Or at least could obtain one if they really wanted. (Although this is true in quite a lot countries, isn't it? The UK remains unusual in how difficult it is to obtain guns.)

I was doing a sarcastic and cynical bit about Americans and guns.  Thought that was fairly obvious, but I guess not.


Whilst more guns are available to buy in Japan than Britain, I believe the restrictions there are even tighter than here and you have to jump through an awful lot of hoops before you can even hold one, let alone own one.

I also once worked with a Saffer who said it was incredibly difficult to buy a gun legally in South Africa, but there are so many black market guns doing the rounds no one bothers even trying.

Zetetic

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #27 on: January 10, 2021, 11:34:42 PM »
I was doing a sarcastic and cynical bit about Americans and guns.  Thought that was fairly obvious, but I guess not.
I don't really know what you meant by "the equivalent over here".

Shit Good Nose

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #28 on: January 10, 2021, 11:37:19 PM »
It was an attempt at humour with a ridiculous leap of logic and literally nothing more.

I know you like to analyse and statisticise stuff to microscopic levels but, trust me, that one wasn't worth it.

And now the bit is ruined.  I'll get my coat.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Man with gun acts very silly, accidentally shoots near his willy
« Reply #29 on: January 11, 2021, 12:07:15 AM »
Rupåert “the Bear”?



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