gonna grow some mushrooms

[ZoyzaSorris]

Yeah, fungi are just inherently weird, there's no doubt about it. I think we are hard-wired to have confusing feelings about them because one hand they can be really great food and on the other they are inextricably linked with death and decay, as well as on occasion being catastrophically poisonous via liquefaction of your internal organs of course (can't tar the whole kingdom with that brush on account of a few death cap bad apples though). No need to compound that by making them grow out the side of a juice carton or paperback book, mind you.

However the whole fandango is well worth doing if you like eating mushrooms - shop bought ones just can't compare to the freshly picked free range hand reared variety, they are just so meaty and flavoursome, amazing that you can really easily grow some protein-rich food that virtually matches meat for meatiness esssentially on household waste. Also just a really interesting thing to get into if you like a bit of biology. You'll be thankful of the skills by the time Covid-22 hits.   

This inspired me to dig out my old notes from the great mushroom growing season of '19. Here's one of my first efforts, a 2.2kg blend of coffee and damp pasteurised straw I believe, yielding 260g of oysters on the first flush which isn't a bad yield (>10%, plus got a couple of more good flushes out of it):

The colonised fruiting block opened up out of the 5 litre bucket for examination:


First fruits starting to form at the holes:


The first flush in all its glory. Bloody lovely sauteed to within an inch of its life in a ton of butter:

[ZoyzaSorris]

Can you grow them indoors, or will they take over the house?

Yes, just might have to give them a spray with some water now and again to make sure they don't dry out, especially when the fruits start to appear. The fruits are 90% water. The whole insect issue is less of a problem if you grow them indoors, though the little flies will still find a way when the weather's warm.

[ZoyzaSorris]

I had one of those coffee logs a few years ago that sprouted oyster mushrooms. The experience was (equally and in order): boredom, horror, fascination. The mushrooms were delicious and would love to have another go but a bit more freestyle. I wanted to grow some weed and get into the horticulture side of that but I don't smoke and would end up like George Jung knowing my luck. So this seems safer and I do eat mushrooms.

I have some (unused) soil pipe in the garage - would that be any good to grow in? Do you need all the space of the bucket?

Had a look at that site and already my ambitions are exceeding my talent.

Do it! I'm tempted to have another crack myself I have to say. Still got my holey buckets somewhere. I'm sure good thickness plastic piping would do the job, I think you could probably use most containers to be honest and it would work to at least an extent.

Definitely worth doing it your own way rather than going down the pre-packaged kit-type route I'd say, much more satisfying (and a helluva lot cheaper).

[Blue Jam]

Yeah, fungi are just inherently weird, there's no doubt about it. I think we are hard-wired to have confusing feelings about them because one hand they can be really great food and on the other they are inextricably linked with death and decay, as well as on occasion being catastrophically poisonous via liquefaction of your internal organs of course (can't tar the whole kingdom with that brush on account of a few death cap bad apples though).

This is a good post.

No need to compound that by making them grow out the side of a juice carton or paperback book, mind you.

Yeah, that's too much.

Also just a really interesting thing to get into if you like a bit of biology. You'll be thankful of the skills by the time Covid-22 hits.

Also this. I guess being a homebrewer and a baker of bread makes me something of a fungus enthusiast and I do think yeast is a fascinating and beautiful thing, but growing mushrooms is a bit freaky even for me.

Incidentally this thread really made me crave a few mushrooms so I went and bought a load of chestnut mushrooms earlier, chopped them up really finely like you would do for a beef wellington, and added white wine, tarragon, rosemary, white pepper and a bit of cream to make a sauce for some butterflied chicken breasticles. Served it with some potatatoes sautéed with spinach. Was very nice but nowhere near as mushroomy as I had been aiming to make it. What's the trick to getting things tasting mushroomy AF?

Also has anyone ever made their own mushroom ketchup? Not a euphemism. Mushroom ketchup sounds like the most savoury thing ever.

[paruses]

Was very nice but nowhere near as mushroomy as I had been aiming to make it. What's the trick to getting things tasting mushroomy AF?

Also has anyone ever made their own mushroom ketchup? Not a euphemism. Mushroom ketchup sounds like the most savoury thing ever.

Cook them for about 10 times longer than you think you should. Best way I found is to completely dry fry them so all the water goes then add a bit of oil and fry - or don't fry and add them to the dish. Just have to get the hang of not scorching them but having it hot enough to evaporate the water. Makes the flavour much more intense and they're surprisingly not greasy - when they're full of water the oil just sits on the surface and coats them.

[ZoyzaSorris]

Yes I was thinking there is a bit of a brewing / baking / mushrooming nexus crossover of interest as the home brew thread was also getting bumped. I'd love to get well on that vibe too but can't handle the carbs really which is a shame because I bloody love beer and can imagine getting really into it, maybe I'll just have to try doing some dry garden fruit wine type business.

[pancreas]

The other weird thing about them is that the fruiting bodies are in effect spunk pumps. Hence you are eating the engorged penises of some ephemeral cotton wool entity.

[PlanktonSideburns]

Lush

[ZoyzaSorris]

Now it's not just delicious but very sexy too. I'm getting some spawn ordered quick smart before everyone does.

[Blue Jam]

NSFW:

https://youtu.be/b-nJ0ROGD14

[dissolute ocelot]

Also has anyone ever made their own mushroom ketchup? Not a euphemism. Mushroom ketchup sounds like the most savoury thing ever.

I've looked at recipes for mushroom ketchup but never been brave enough. You need to leave the mushrooms till they become a bit old and soggy and then cook them for a long time. It's the intentionally letting mushrooms go bad that scares me.[nb]Incidentally, one of the most disturbing sights in my kitchen was when I left an improperly sealed bag of dried porcini in a cupboard for about a year, anyone who thinks fungus can't go mouldy is very wrong.[/nb] Although also I'm not sure how many mushrooms you need for a decent quantity - you can buy mushroom ketchup from the right sort of shop probably more cheaply than a big bag of mushrooms.[nb]Semi-relatedly, I was given sprout ketchup for Xmas which I am also scared to eat.[/nb]

[pancreas]

Semi-relatedly, I was given sprout ketchup for Xmas which I am also scared to eat.

STOP being afraid

[dissolute ocelot]

STOP being afraid

I just tried the brussels sprout ketchup on a potato waffle, it tastes a bit like brown sauce (similar mix of sour and sweet) but with a thankfully mild sprouty undertone. Probably nothing like mushroom ketchup.

[ZoyzaSorris]

Sadly anyone who says fungus can't go mouldy hasn't tried growing fungi. Your culture getting killed off by aggressive moulds is number one cause of alien spunk pump cotton wool entity death.

[NattyDread 2]

alien spunk pump cotton wool entity death.

Got all their albums

[Twit 2]

John Cage was obsessed with mushrooms but had absolutely no interest in the hallucinogenic type. TWAT

[pancreas]

Made this tonight. FUCKING AMAZING.

https://thehappyfoodie.co.uk/recipes/ottolenghis-spicy-mushroom-lasagne

Do it. Do it ASAP.

[Twit 2]

looks sex tbf

[Blue Jam]

Sadly anyone who says fungus can't go mouldy hasn't tried growing fungi. Your culture getting killed off by aggressive moulds is number one cause of alien spunk pump cotton wool entity death.

Happens with brewing as well, and "killer yeast" strains:

https://beerandbrewing.com/dictionary/zLJQyKllnS/

Fungi are brutal.

[Absorb the anus burn]

I found this article today and thought about the CaB shroomers who are looking for alternatives to orange juice box growing.

https://www.iflscience.com/health-and-medicine/man-injected-magic-mushrooms-into-his-veins-and-they-started-to-grow-in-his-blood/

[Blue Jam]

Cook them for about 10 times longer than you think you should. Best way I found is to completely dry fry them so all the water goes then add a bit of oil and fry - or don't fry and add them to the dish. Just have to get the hang of not scorching them but having it hot enough to evaporate the water. Makes the flavour much more intense and they're surprisingly not greasy - when they're full of water the oil just sits on the surface and coats them.

Just tried this with the remainder of my chestnut mushrooms. Chopped them coarsely then dry-fried them, pressing down on them with a spatula so they made that horrible screaming noise, then when they were mostly dry and on the point of burning I added some nice peppery olive oil and a touch of butter, then added some par-boiled potato slices, then poured over a mix of eggs and single cream with a bit of parsley and black pepper. Used up a load of things that needed using up and ended up with a nice mushroomy Spanish omelette. Worked a treat, cheers!

[ZoyzaSorris]

Happens with brewing as well, and "killer yeast" strains:

https://beerandbrewing.com/dictionary/zLJQyKllnS/

Fungi are brutal.

Yes, it's a slow-motion warzone out there. Fascinating stuff. Fungi are more closely related to animals than plants!

[Blue Jam]

Fungi can get infected by other fungi, just as viruses can infect bacteria and other viruses, and parasitic animals can themselves get parasites. Parasites of parasites are called hyperparasites, and hyperparasites can also get parasites. Parasites of parasites of parasites.

Nature is brutal alright.