How should No Time to Die be released?

[popcorn]

- Daniel Craig explains film over the phone to Peter Bradshaw who then reviews it

- One Wikipedia editor is allowed to watch it, then write the plot summary for the Wikipedia article (making sure to keep to the 700-word plot summary limit and avoid original research or personal analysis)

- ITV

[Captain Z]

- Cut into 13 sections and hidden in various locations around the UK. Clues inside promotional packs of Golden Grahams.

[frajer]

- a gas that you immerse yourself in and then for 2.5 hours it feels like Mads Mikkelsen is slamming a knotted rope into your plums

[seepage]

Ch.5 9pm

[Glebe]

Should be issued by BBC on a VHS.

[petril]

walking out of the court and celebrating with the lawyers and talking about justice being finally done

[El Unicornio, mang]

All 24 DVD chapters released on separate discs with each monthly issue of this magazine. First issue only 99p! (6GBP each after that)

[Captain Z]

Release it in cinemas but only allow one person in at a time. If they'd done this last year they probably would be even by now.

[Fambo Number Mive]

Via an enema

[rue the polywhirl]

Make one physical copy of it and then launch it into space for other life forms to discover. Destroy all other copies.

[the]

I thought it was called

Don't Die James Bond

Anyway, they could just give it away with I'm A Cunt magazine

[the]

Oh, Unicornio already said that.

[Replies From View]

Have it on one of those 30 second silent rolls of film they used to sell as toys.

[Captain Z]

£2.99 Poundstretcher

[Dex Sawash]

600x800 or 800x600

[El Unicornio, mang]

Joint venture with Thomas Cook (clever ad campaign with "Cook. Thomas Cook" as the tagline), only shown on their flights to and from the Caribbean. Heavily edited for scenes of a sexual nature, violence and mild peril. Interrupted every 10 minutes with clever ad campaign "Free. Duty Free".

[Al Tha Funkee Homosapien]

A stern faced man comes to your house and reads you the script whilst his 10-year old son recreates the actions scenes with a toilet brush and a pine cone.

[Replies From View]

600x800 or 800x600

okay but it has to be an array of marbles on a stone floor with no friction to speak of

[Bazooka]

Zoetrope free with a can of luncheon meat.

[Fambo Number Mive]

All actors should have to inhale helium before speaking, Day Today style.

[Sherringford Hovis]

Get Andrew Eldritch to change the lyrics to No Time To Cry like Elton did for Princess Di(e).

[PlanktonSideburns]

Livestreamed dj set

[lipsink]

An elderly relative tells you the story over Skype while you stare at the top of their head.

[thecuriousorange]

They should delay it another four or five times. What other film has had this much free publicity?

[Replies From View]

They should delay it another four or five times. What other film has had this much free publicity?

ice cold in alex

[peanutbutter]

On the Pirate Bay next June (one month before its actual release date)


Releasing it on a new extremely shite streaming service would be good too. Some sort of James Bond movie themed netflix.

[Fambo Number Mive]

Its kidnappers say only if they get a car and plane tickets.

[PlanktonSideburns]

POG

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

£2.99 Poundstretcher

Agreed

[Absorb the anus burn]

Projected onto the sky across the earth with every human charged their nation equivalent of 4p to look upwards.