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Phil The Greek In Hospital

Started by Huxleys Babkins, February 17, 2021, 02:14:08 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

GoblinAhFuckScary

I saw Prince Philip, Duke of Edingburgh, in Harrods the other day. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn't want to be a cunt and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, "Oh, like you're doing now?"

I was taken aback, and all I could say was "Huh?" but he kept cutting me off and going "huh? huh? huh?" and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off.

When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like "Sir, you need to pay for those first." At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually "to prevent any electrical infetterence," and then turned around and winked at me. I don't even think that's a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

touchingcloth

Does anyone know what hospital he is in? We've had a whip round at work and bought him this bear and some balloons and a get well soon card to go with it, so I'd like to head round to give them to him during my lunch break:



Be jeal of Greeks receiving gifts, am I right!

Cold Meat Platter

All the best for a speedy recovery big man.

BlodwynPig

Happy birthday my lord, enjoy your weekend shoot and gallavant. Make sure you tune in to the moon landing broadcast on BBC 1 !

DrGreggles


Captain Z

That we haven't heard for a while probably suggests that he isn't getting worse.

Cold Meat Platter

Quote from: Captain Z on July 23, 2021, 10:36:42 PM
That we haven't heard for a while probably suggests that he isn't getting worse.

I know it's a cliché but no news is good news.
My mum's church have been praying for the old buzzard, some of them have been embroidering these really intense portraits of him. It's uncanny how the eyes follow you.

idunnosomename

someone told me he was dead so I fucking beat them, broke their neck, dismembered them and flushed them down the toilet. phew! that goodness it was cooler today.

best wishes pal, hope to see you say something about slitty eyes that we can all secretly enjoy very soon. 👌

Cold Meat Platter

Quote from: idunnosomename on July 25, 2021, 12:56:35 AM
someone told me he was dead so I fucking beat them, broke their neck, dismembered them and flushed them down the toilet. phew! that goodness it was cooler today.

I know you mean well but this is a bit much. TBH I'm not sure it's what Phil would really want. God bless you The Duke of Hearts.

JamesTC

You can't kill the undead. And he is undead. In the sense that he is not dead.

touchingcloth

Quote from: Cold Meat Platter on July 25, 2021, 12:48:53 AM
I know it's a cliché but no news is good news.
My mum's church have been praying for the old buzzard, some of them have been embroidering these really intense portraits of him. It's uncanny how the eyes follow you.

I found that at first until I realised they had glued googly eyes on.

Video Game Fan 2000


touchingcloth

Quote from: Video Game Fan 2000 on July 25, 2021, 02:27:08 AM
This cunt dead yet.

Thankfully, no. Keep fighting, old boy! We're here for you and we love you! 💗

JamesTC

Wonder if this thread will get to 100 pages before he carks it.

BlodwynPig


Cold Meat Platter

I've withdrawn all my benefit money and sent it to Buckingham Palace in the hope that what little I have can help in some way.

Butchers Blind

He'll be there for 'Dead Diana 25' celebrations next year.

BlodwynPig

Quote from: Butchers Blind on July 29, 2021, 07:58:26 PM
He'll be there for 'Dead Diana 25' celebrations next year.

BBC commentator (Huw Edwards): "Look at the crowds, incredible scenes along The Mall"

"The royal guardsman, strident in the brilliant sunshine. Oh, and here's young Prince George, resplendent in his breeches and Top Hat, an heirloom from his grandmother's father, the Duke of Allthingssininister"

"What's this?!" *chuckles* "Why, it's The Duke of Edinburgh himself, grinning from the wheel of the white Fiat Uno as it tears full pelt down The Mall"

"The screams of the crowd are reaching a crescendo now, Nick Witchell the latest to feel the full force of the Duke's vehicle. And now, solemnly he slows as he passes Adrian Jones' monument to Sir Fred West ...a mark of respect no doubt from Prince Philip...Oh, he's off again, now it's the Royal great-grandchildren's turn, tumbling and reeling into the air." *chuckles* "Some lucky member of the public there, catching George's hat as it's flung violently from his severed head"

Butchers Blind

Quote from: idunnosomename on July 31, 2021, 10:49:16 AM
funny how they seem to have sneakily edited out Philip (who is dead).

Breaking news from a CaB member. Is... is this true?

idunnosomename

God do I need SARCASM TAGS?!?! it was a joke you clown. Hes actually in good spirits, although he looks like death warmed up.

touchingcloth

Quote from: idunnosomename on July 31, 2021, 01:23:13 PM
God do I need SARCASM TAGS?!?! it was a joke you clown. Hes actually in good spirits, although he looks like death warmed up.

Where have you seen this? He was looking chipper last time I saw him!

Paul Calf

Quote from: idunnosomename on July 31, 2021, 01:23:13 PM
God do I need SARCASM TAGS?!?! it was a joke you clown. Hes actually in good spirits, although he looks like death warmed up.

There are some things you just don't joke about. Imagine if he were found passed on  tomorrow morning. How would you feel  then?

Just had word from the hospital that Phil's seen this thread and he's over the moon about the outpouring of support and good natured joshing.

"It gets my PHIL THUMBS UP!" he quipped.

TommyTurnips

I'll be keeping him in my thoughts and sending healing vibes.

touchingcloth

Quote from: TommyTurnips on August 03, 2021, 08:53:03 PM
I'll be keeping him in my thoughts and sending healing vibes.

He's more of a plugs than vibes man, his stablehand tells me.

idunnosomename

hope the vile old cunt pulls through. big clap for him on Thursday.

GoblinAhFuckScary

is Prince Philip, Duke of Edingburgh ok?

Cold Meat Platter

Praying for you tonight big guy <3

Cold Meat Platter

Oh Fuck No!

EDIT :Oh FFS surely that's a pretty careless wording on the news there. "Prince Phillips is dead pleased at Britain's performance in the Olympics"?

chveik

Quote from: Cold Meat Platter on August 04, 2021, 03:02:19 AM
Oh Fuck No!

EDIT :Oh FFS surely that's a pretty careless wording on the news there. "Prince Phillips is dead pleased at Britain's performance in the Olympics"?

urgh, i hate when people do this

thoughts and prayers xx