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Meat substitutes

Started by holyzombiejesus, February 17, 2021, 03:51:24 PM

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holyzombiejesus

There are fucking loads around nowadays. When I first turned vegetarian, if we wanted something that was pretending to be meat, all we had was sosmix or beanfeast. Whereas today I got to choose between a vegan meatball wrap and a vegan salted beef roll with gherkins and mustard mayo. Earlier in the week I bought a can of something called Tuno for a quid from Morrisons. It wasn't particularly nice although for some reason it was quite warm when it came out of the can and I can't remember ever getting that from real tuna.

People seem to get irritated by vegetarians choosing fake meat but, for me, I don't buy these things because I want, say, a bacon sandwich or a vegetarian version of one, I just like the option of having something in my sandwiches that isn't cheese.

Are there any other good ones to keep an eye out for?

The Mollusk

I'm up and down with meat substitutes. It's not that I want to literally supplement bacon or chicken or whatever because I miss eating meat, but on the other hand, like yourself I do enjoy having a bit of a chewy texture in a sandwich, which is why I'll usually have a pack of smoked tofurkey or Quorn fake ham in the fridge for work lunches. Plus it's a good bit of protein innit.

These are pretty top banana, you can get 'em in Saino's:


Fambo Number Mive

That's one for the Dude thread, that happy looking tofu sandwich waiting for someone to bite into it.



crankshaft

Quote from: holyzombiejesus on February 17, 2021, 03:51:24 PM
There are fucking loads around nowadays. When I first turned vegetarian, if we wanted something that was pretending to be meat, all we had was sosmix or beanfeast.

Both of which were wicked. Sosmix made for the best sausage rolls and scotch eggs; Beanfeast was perfect for shepherd's pie.

I make my own seitan these days for the odd stir fry or stew.


The Ombudsman

Having never eaten meat/fish, I eat these things as just food rather than a substitute for something else. That said, I've tried a good few of the new stuff out there and much of it isn't to my taste. I wonder if this is due to the goods being too good an analogue and it's just therefore very foreign to me.

Quorn mince & chicken pieces, Linda McCartneys burgers and sausages are about all I really dabble with.

I did love Sosmix, which makes me want to go look for it online now.

holyzombiejesus

Quote from: The Mollusk on February 17, 2021, 03:57:46 PM
These are pretty top banana, you can get 'em in Saino's:



They also do some sausages, a bit like these below but in a green wrapper. They're really good.



There are some nice big chunky fish fingers out there too. I don;t really bother with Quorn/ Linda Mc (apart from the mozarella burgers) anymore, there are some much nicer things out there.

Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

Hail seitan!

I used to eat Quorn fairly often. There's no mistaking it for real meat, but it works perfectly well in chili, curry, etc. I've not had if in a few years though, since both my housemate's took against it for various reasons.

Quote from: The Ombudsman on February 17, 2021, 04:20:49 PM
Having never eaten meat/fish, I eat these things as just food rather than a substitute for something else. That said, I've tried a good few of the new stuff out there and much of it isn't to my taste. I wonder if this is due to the goods being too good an analogue and it's just therefore very foreign to me.
That's interesting. I recently had some sort of vegan burger[nb]Made from real vegans.[/nb] that was quite convincing. It even bled beetroot juice, or something. I mentioned that last fact to a lifelong vegetarian friend and they seemed surprisingly repulsed.

The Ombudsman

QuoteThat's interesting. I recently had some sort of vegan burger[1] that was quite convincing. It even bled beetroot juice, or something. I mentioned that last fact to a lifelong vegetarian friend and they seemed surprisingly repulsed.

I tried them and just couldn't get on with them. Perhaps it is a squeamish reaction but it seemed a bit too much for me. It is interesting as I much prefer the burgers/sausages that seem to be most unlike the real thing.

dissolute ocelot

There's a lot of good burgers, if you want burgers that resemble meat but aren't: Beyond, Vivera, etc, although some are more expensive than actual good quality minced beef. Vivera do a vegan shawarma meat piece thing which is quite good in a wrap or bun. Various companies do decent nuggets too - but most things covered in breadcrumbs and soaked in oil are nice. Linda McCartney used to have a reputation as being terrible but they do some quite decent, inventive, reasonably-priced things like pulled pork bao buns and fake duck wraps.

As someone who's been a vegetarian for a very long time and can't stand Quorn chicken, I'm still a bit suspicious of meat substitutes. A decent bean burger is cheaper and more tasty, but the meaty ones are nice too and have a bit more texture than some vegan food. Some of the cheaper stuff is terrible though: some of Quorn's stuff is really bad, and Ginsters fake meat pasties are even more disgusting than the meat ones, though they do a nice mediterranean veg pasty. Vegan fish I don't really see the point of, but Quorn vegan fish fingers are adequate in a sandwich with a lot of sauce.

Josef K

I tend to avoid cooking with meat substitutes (feels like cheating) but I do get huge cravings for a nice meaty-textured burger slathered in bbq sauce and melted cheese quite often. Like many have said, it's not so much missing meat, as the texture being great paired with condiments and stuck between bread.

Beyond/Impossible burgers are the best I've had, they tend to be a bit pricier though. Big Tesco sells them in the freezer section now.
My go to option is this bad boy from the co-op:


Fuck quorn though, gives me the shits


Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth

Quote from: The Ombudsman on February 17, 2021, 04:43:33 PM
I tried them and just couldn't get on with them. Perhaps it is a squeamish reaction but it seemed a bit too much for me. It is interesting as I much prefer the burgers/sausages that seem to be most unlike the real thing.
I suppose it's more for convincing/tricking your Jeremy Clarkson types to give it a try.
I have noticed that a lot of veg[etari]ans are actually viscerally disgusted by meat, beyond their moral objections. It makes sense - I expect I'd find it similarly ronking if someone served me a plate of eyeballs or the like.

Rizla

Sosmix and something called 5-grain burgamix were my choice in my vegetarian days, I'd love to try the latter again, I remember it being ace. Also had a phase of doing stir-frys with those tins of mock duck/mock abalone/mock whatever you get in the chinese supermarket, they're pretty weird. Delicious but weird. I think they're just wheat gluten with a ton of flavouring and msg.


The Mollusk

Quote from: dissolute ocelot on February 17, 2021, 04:50:19 PM
There's a lot of good burgers, if you want burgers that resemble meat but aren't: Beyond, Vivera, etc, although some are more expensive than actual good quality minced beef. Vivera do a vegan shawarma meat piece thing which is quite good in a wrap or bun. Various companies do decent nuggets too - but most things covered in breadcrumbs and soaked in oil are nice. Linda McCartney used to have a reputation as being terrible but they do some quite decent, inventive, reasonably-priced things like pulled pork bao buns and fake duck wraps.



I can't recommend these highly enough, they're about £2.50 for a pack of two and they're chunky/meaty as fuck (I don't care about describing them as "meaty", mushrooms can be described the same way). Caramelise some red onions, slap them on with some gherkins, bit of rocket and some sriracha or English mustard, absolutely bang tidy.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

Jackfruit is acceptable in spicy food, adding a certain fibrous meaty texture.

Cans of jackfruit chunks are pretty easy to get hold of and it is quite robust stuff, stands up to being twatted about a bit and absorbs flavour fairly well.

gib



The rice is boring, the sweet n sour is good, but the chicken balls are brilliant, wish they just did a massive box of those with a tub of sauce.

The Ombudsman

QuoteI have noticed that a lot of veg[etari]ans are actually viscerally disgusted by meat, beyond their moral objections. It makes sense - I expect I'd find it similarly ronking if someone served me a plate of eyeballs or the like.

Yeah, never could quite deal with the meats. I think the fact you have to cook it carefully to avoid getting ill taints it a bit too.

The Ombudsman

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on February 17, 2021, 05:24:22 PM
Jackfruit is acceptable in spicy food, adding a certain fibrous meaty texture.

Cans of jackfruit chunks are pretty easy to get hold of and it is quite robust stuff, stands up to being twatted about a bit and absorbs flavour fairly well.

Tried the jackfruit a couple of times and it tasted like a bland rough tomato. Perhaps it's just the way it was cooked.

Side note, can you still get TVP? My nan used to bulk out my grandads mince with the stuff. Might make the quorn mince last a bit longer.

The Ombudsman

Has anyone tried the Quorn roast? I can eat this but always wish it was something better.


Elderly Sumo Prophecy

Quote from: Chedney Honks on February 17, 2021, 05:05:53 PM
McDonald's?

Actually, has anyone ever had whatever McDonald's veggie burger offering is called, and is it any good? It's one of those things I always intend to order one day, but never do, like chicken nuggets, or root beer when they still did it.

NattyDread 2

Quote from: The Ombudsman on February 17, 2021, 05:30:02 PM
Side note, can you still get TVP? My nan used to bulk out my grandads mince with the stuff. Might make the quorn mince last a bit longer.

Yep. Got a chilli made with it bubbling away just now. Needs a fair bit of flavouring of course so it's pretty good for that.

The Ombudsman

Quote from: NattyDread 2 on February 17, 2021, 05:46:52 PM
Yep. Got a chilli made with it bubbling away just now. Needs a fair bit of flavouring of course so it's pretty good for that.

Cool. Will try getting it again and give it a go. I remember it being lovely and cheap.

Thomas

Quote from: holyzombiejesus on February 17, 2021, 03:51:24 PM
People seem to get irritated by vegetarians choosing fake meat

They do, but I think it's defensive. They must be aware that meat doesn't simply fall off the cow in the form of seasoned strips of bacon, and that the tubular shape of a sausage isn't reserved exclusively for pig flesh.

I'm new to scoffing tofu. I like swamping it in soy sauce and smoked paprika on piling it onto a hill of brown rice.

also quorn chicken dippers

The Mollusk

Quote from: The Ombudsman on February 17, 2021, 05:31:13 PM
Has anyone tried the Quorn roast? I can eat this but always wish it was something better.



Can't stand that shite. Quorn do a lot of decent stuff but that thing is just a fucking log of nothing. But then I never understood the appeal of turkey (especially in a roast) which is what this wodge of bland, dry shite is attempting to replicate.

Quote from: Thomas on February 17, 2021, 06:08:56 PM
They do, but I think it's defensive. They must be aware that meat doesn't simply fall off the cow in the form of seasoned strips of bacon, and that the tubular shape of a sausage isn't reserved exclusively for pig flesh.

Yeah, it falls under the same stupid argument that YOU CARNT CALL IT A BORGAR THERS NO MEAT IN IT FUK OFF VEGANS GET UR OWN WORD. Just carnivores being salty bitches and acting as though their whole world is crumbling down around their ears because a term's definition has stretched a bit. CANT FUKIN BELEVE PPL WANT TO MAKE A BETTER WOLRD FOR ALL LIVIN CREATURS MAEKS ME SICK

QuoteI'm new to scoffing tofu. I like swamping it in soy sauce and smoked paprika on piling it onto a hill of brown rice.

Most of the time nowadays when preparing tofu I'll do it crispy, chop it into cubes and then coat it in cornflour, let it sit for a few minutes and then shallow fry it. Flip the cubes after about 5 minutes to do the other side, then set them on a kitchen towel and drain off the oil. Works especially well with satay or sweet and sour.

Twit 2

I can dig veggie food when it goes INSANE with umami:

https://thehappyfoodie.co.uk/recipes/ottolenghis-spicy-mushroom-lasagne

This nearly defeated me, and I'm the sort of cunt who'd eat raw shrimp paste.

Jockice

I've only very recently discovered Wicked Kitchen stuff on sale in Tesco. Some of it is spicy so it's a big no from me but the macaroni cheese and mushroom bolognese is great. That's two separate things by the way. And also not really meat substitutes either.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

QuoteAnd also not really meat substitutes either.

It's fun to pretend that macaroni is little animals bones and the cheese is their gammy necrotic life gunk


Alberon

Mrs Alberon has been trying to reduce the meat in her diet so we've trying some substitutes. The Quorn 'chicken' isn't bad though it never really passes as meat.

Quote from: The Ombudsman on February 17, 2021, 05:31:13 PM
Has anyone tried the Quorn roast? I can eat this but always wish it was something better.



We tried this, and it wasn't bad, but the weird thing was we only ate half of it and the other half just vanished. I've become convinced it's living behind the skirting boards and will leap out and bite my foot off one day.