How would sitcom characters cope with the lockdown?

[Petey Pate]

Last of the Summer Wine

"A devastating final episode" - Radio Times

"There's no way you're getting me on that ventilator."

[Bad Ambassador]

Ghosts

The ghosts, who have not left the house or grounds for at least decades, invite Alison to join their activities. Mike, who has only Alison for company and is going stir crazy, tries various means to contact the ghosts himself and join in. Ends with a Shining parody in which he gets locked out overnight.

Red Dwarf

Holly mentions the pandemic as the reason all the pigs started talking.

Black Books

Bernard fails to notice drop in business.

[Dex Sawash]

The Good Place

Fuck knows because it is unwatchable

[Marner and Me]

Game On.

After much hilarity at the irony of Matthew not being allowed to leave the flat, he uses the time as a chance to overcome his agoraphobia and wanders the empty streets.

Situation no change for Matthew apart from he gets more annoyed at having Mandy and Martin in the house. Mandy finally fucks one of them as she is gagging for cock.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

The Good Place

Fuck knows because it is unwatchable

Your face is unwatchable.

[JamesTC]

The Good Place

Fuck knows because it is unwatchable

You chose a sitcom were all the characters are dead. You might as well have said Dinosaurs*

*if dinosaurs, as I suspect, cannot get Covid 19.

[thenoise]

One Foot

Victor's bitch of a wife forces him to go somewhere unsafe during the pandemic. At the last minute realises that he has brought some frilly knickers instead of a mask, Victor says 'I dont believe it', although he puts them on and it seems to do the trick. Until he is arrested for being a mega perv. Margaret goes 'oohhhhhh!' and rolls her eyes. For the #sadbit Mrs Warboys finds love but then he dies of Covid and she isn't one of the permitted people at his funeral so she goes round the Meldrews and has a bit of a moan. Victor is sympathetic but she cheers herself up by laughing about what an idiot Victor is along with Margaret. Margaret says 'oohhhhhh!' again, roll credits.

[idunnosomename]

The one-off Ed Reardon's Week in December was superb. I have thought about starting a Lazy Boring Pandemic Slags thread for unfunny lockdown tropes, but basically it's just Tiger King and Banana Bread, isn't it

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

Father Ted

"God Dougal, this pandemic could tear through Craggy Island at an awful rate. And just imagine all the funerals we'd have to do then!"

"Sure Ted, COVID-19 isn't real, it's all a plot by the global deep state to fill us up with vaccinations and mind control."

"Dougal, what have I told you about reading Gemma O'Doherty's Twitter feed? ...Anyway we've got to be careful with Jack. He's in a vulnerable group."

"DRINK!"

"Although I'm sure the alcohol has a sterilising effect."

Enter Mrs. Doyle hilariously wearing two face-masks.

"Now Fathers, tea for everyone!"

"UGH! Mrs. Doyle, what's wrong with this tea?"

"I put a big dollop of hand sanitizer in it, Father! You can't be too careful these days!"

Dougal happily drinks his tea while Ted makes a face. Mrs. Doyle goes to open the window and hilariously falls out of it.

[Ptolemy Ptarmigan]

Dad's Army - might achey

Yep, POST!

[Quote]

Bottom

*Ritchie & Eddie boredly stare out of the window*

Ritchie: Well this lockdown has certainly been a thrillride hasn't it?

Eddie: Leave it out mate, there's nothing you can do about it

Ritchie: I've been cruelly cutdown in my sexual peak...

Eddie: You should be used to it by now Ritchie, birds have been social distancing from you since well before this all kicked off

*Ritchie sighs*

Eddie: Hey! There he is - Tommy the bastard!

Ritchie: Aha, good old 'Captain Tom'. He certainly pulled a fast one didn't he?

Eddie: He did the same during Live Aid

Ritchie: Did he? I didn't know that. Wonder where he's going this early?

Eddie: Bookies, probably. Or the porn shop.

Ritchie: Are they still open? Hey, you know what, that gives me a bloody idea...

Eddie: Not again Ritchie, you almost went blind during the last lockdown remember!

Ritchie: Shut up Eddie! That's not what I was talking about ... hey, what about - Captain Ritchie!

*Ritchie heads to the kitchen, sellotapes a 2p coin onto his shirt pocket, then salutes*

Ritchie: Yeeeaaahhh, this is bloody brilliant - we'll be swimming in dosh, and birds. I'm a figure the nation could rally behind, a patriot, an ex-service man."

Eddie: You've never been in the army!

Ritchie: Well no, but I'm a patriot though Eddie. I climb onto that roof and unfurl the Union Jack everyday!

Eddie: I thought you only went up there to spy on those student nurses and see if they're out sunbathing again. Yeah, I've seen you, heading up to the roof ... with your binoculars and that tub of vaseline...

Ritchie: Shut up Eddie!

*twats him over the head with a frying pan*