Movies that aren't that good but everyone saw when they were a bit too young

[El Unicornio, mang]

The 1990 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie with Corey Feldman. I remember a 3rd generation cam bootleg of it being passed around the school like it was the second coming on tape, the kid who got hold of it was treated like a king for the entire duration.

Also, it was the original American version, not the stupid British edit with "ninja" replaced with "hero" and the nunchakus removed, etc.

[St_Eddie]

I grew up watching the likes of The Exorcist, Robocop and indeed Serial Mom.  My parents were very liberal when it came to allowing me to watch films.  I'm eternally grateful, as it gave me a life long passion for film.

[bomb_dog]

And the horrifying bit when the bad woman gets turned into a robot.

I love 'The Black Hole' and saw that aged perhaps 8. Bleak as fuck, and a few horrifying scenes like the whirling blades and the start of the laser lobotomy. Still love it now and rewatch it every now and again. Soundtrack gets an airing more often too.

[Dex Sawash]

Finding Nemo

[Gregory Torso]

Any Kevin Smith film.

[The Mollusk]

The Matrix

Absolutely this.

I watched it the other night for the first time since seeing it in the cinema in 1999, when I would have been 12 (fuck only knows how I got in - isn't it a 15 certificate?), so doubtless it totally went over my head at that age, but I still almost certainly enjoyed it more then than I did last Friday night.

Am I right in thinking that it was quite a landmark of Western cinema with its reality-bending storyline, ultra dark cybergoth techno hacker futurism and radical special effect? Correct me if that's way off the mark since I'm not really a big cinephile, but fuck me, if that's the case it sincerely has aged terribly. I was musing afterwards as to whether this was due in part to how much it's been referenced and memed to death in the subsequent two decades and if that's cheapened it somewhat, but I honestly don't think that's totally the case. It's just not a very good film. I found it extremely difficult to view it objectively for an "of its time" piece, at no point did I think "Yeah this looks great despite its age".

Outside of its main plot, the structure of the film is boring; the betrayal, love interest and master/teacher arcs are honestly shit by any measure. At times, the performances are so corny they're laughable. All the fuckin side characters like Mouse and Tank and Wrench and Cosmo and Dingdong are such tedious padding, none of whom the viewer cares a single fuck about.

The soundtrack, which to be fair is something that has definitely been cheapened by its endless usage in other subsequent media, occupies a niche little pocket of '90s electronica which sincerely does not stand the test of time at all. At no point does it feel cool or cutting edge, more just limp and flabby. Similarly, Keanu does nowt for that film's credibility whatsoever. The bit where he's doing the training program and Morpheus walks in and Neo goes "I know kung fu!" like an excited toddler trying to do an impression of a cool person actually made me burst out laughing.

[Spiteface]

Robocop

[Gregory Torso]

Robocop is great. Watched it "recently" (about 4 years ago) and it stood up.

(removed swear words)

[Chedney Honks]

Absolutely this.

I recently watched the original Ghost In The Shell anime, which The Matrix ripped off in theme, aesthetic, narrative and all manner of ways, and it's still fucking brilliant. I also recently got The Matrix 4K boxset because I heard the picture was amazing and it is, but I cringed my bollocks into Smints. Absolutely awful. A couple of good fights because the choreographer is a Hong Kong legend and can't help but polish the action into something passable. I also liked the very ending, the bullet time stuff washed still pretty cool. Everything else was faintly embarrassing. The music is as bad as the acting. Didn't even get to the sequels and flogged it on eBay.

[JaDanketies]

I was surprised to learn that the original Judge Dredd was critically slammed and is considered an embarrassment.

Surprised anyone watched Serial Mom but I thought it was a great film for what it was.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Am I right in thinking that it was quite a landmark of Western cinema with its reality-bending storyline, ultra dark cybergoth techno hacker futurism and radical special effect?

Dark City and Blade, both released in 1998, had similar plot themes and action/style respectively. The Matrix obviously reached a far larger audience though.

[greenman]

I think the Matrix works fine enough as a pretty standard Hollywood action film with some trendy influences, the cult around the films importance that arguably fed into the sequels failings was the problem IMHO.

[Blumf]

Dark City and Blade, both released in 1998, had similar plot themes and action/style respectively. The Matrix obviously reached a far larger audience though.

There was also The Thirteenth Floor (1999)

There's a few earlier films, but mostly B-grade stuff, such as Overdrawn at the Memory Bank (1984), which starred Raul Julia.

[The Mollusk]

Robocop is great. Watched it "recently" (about 4 years ago) and it stood up.

(removed swear words)

I watched it for the first time a couple years back aged 32 and thought it was fuckin superb, gritty batshit absurd coked-up fun. The action and sentimentality both hit sufficiently hard. I love that film.

[Ferris]

Not a single mention of mediocre LL Cool J vehicle Deep Blue Sea? Seems like the archetype of this subgenre to me.

If it hadn't given us this masterpiece of '00s nonsensical hip hop ("my hat is like a sharks fin" over and over and over) then I'd say it was culturally worthless.

[Ferris]

Lawnmower Man and all.

[greenman]

Not a single mention of mediocre LL Cool J vehicle Deep Blue Sea? Seems like the archetype of this subgenre to me.

If it hadn't given us this masterpiece of '00s nonsensical hip hop ("my hat is like a sharks fin" over and over and over) then I'd say it was culturally worthless.

Jackson being eaten by the Shark is pretty much all its remembered for now.

[Ferris]

And/or the exploding parrot. Or did the parrot get eaten? Doesn't matter.

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

SO MANY WRONG OPINIONS ITT ASODHSDUFSDUYBSDGSDFDS

[Bazooka]

And/or the exploding parrot. Or did the parrot get eaten? Doesn't matter.

The shark eats the parrot, LL climbs into an oven to escape the beast, but as it's ramming him the gas turns on.  LL escapes from the oven using a fire axe and then quips; "you ate my bird" and then throws his lighter at the shark causing an explosion.

[Chedney Honks]

Only one answer for me.

Tarkovsky's Stalker.

[Ferris]

The shark eats the parrot, LL climbs into an oven to escape the beast, but as it's ramming him the gas turns on.  LL escapes from the oven using a fire axe and then quips; "you ate my bird" and then throws his lighter at the shark causing an explosion.

Eat your heart out, Ingmar Bergman.

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

Only one answer for me.

Tarkovsky's Stalker.

[The Mollusk]

Only one answer for me.

Tarkovsky's Stalker.

"Stalker" actually didn't have even half the impact on me that "Solaris" did. The former was decent but I felt the slow trudging pace of it, whereas "Solaris" was absolutely captivating from start to finish and profoundly moved me for days afterwards.

[Chedney Honks]

I actually haven't seen either yet but I thought it was a great comedy answer. Got em both sitting here for when the mood takes me. I've seen stills and they look stunning. Just cbf using my brain at the mo.

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

"Stalker" actually didn't have even half the impact on me that "Solaris" did. The former was decent but I felt the slow trudging pace of it, whereas "Solaris" was absolutely captivating from start to finish and profoundly moved me for days afterwards.

Ah mate that's exactly what my partner said after we saw Stalker (their first time) at Close Up off Brick Lane.

I myself do find it utterly profound and I can't get enough of that world. I love each Tarkovsky really.

[Bazooka]

Stalker is the best looking film ever made, even to a new born baby.

[chveik]

matrix takes itself too seriously, speed racer is much more fun

[St_Eddie]

Any Kevin Smith film.

I'd actually say that people are better off watching Kevin Smith films at a relatively young age.  They're much more appealing when you're a teenager.  I was a massive fan of Smith's films at that age and through to my mid-20s.  Eventually, I just outgrew him though.  The older and more mature one becomes, the less appeal Smith's films hold.

[St_Eddie]

I was surprised to learn that the original Judge Dredd was critically slammed and is considered an embarrassment.

Why would that surprise you?  It's a pretty crappy movie, made a thousand times worse if one's familiar with the source material.

There was also The Thirteenth Floor (1999)

Yep.  Same basic premise as The Matrix but done in a way which is appealing to a more intellectual audience who aren't all that interested in seeing cool 90's people in trench coats and shades doing slow-mo fight sequences every 10 minutes.  Back in 1999, I hated The Matrix, but really liked The Thirteenth Floor.  I'll always give the latter a shout out whenever possible.  it deserves more recognition and quite frankly, The Matrix deserves less.