Author Topic: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen  (Read 1697 times)

notjosh

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Michael Myers legging it down a hedge so that when Laurie looks round the corner he's mysteriously disappeared. He squats down, lifts up his mask and breathes heavily.

A coroner up to his elbows in chewed up lady bits, getting put through to Chief Brody on the phone. He begins to fill him in on the circumstances only to find out that Brody wordlessly hung up on him immediately after he said the words "shark attack". He swears and throws a kidney across the room.

Dennis Nedry trying out different takes off "Ah ah aaah, you didn't say the magic word" before he picks the best one. He plays back the animation and giggles to himself.

James Bond painstakingly going through about 50 decks of tarot cards so he can make one comprised entirely of "The Lovers". He struggles with the plastic wrapping and wonders what life would be like if he just ran a little bakery on the Yorkshire coast with a cheerful ruddy-cheeked wife who knits.

King Kong having a wank.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2021, 08:09:39 AM »
Any of the sex scenes filmed between Rollergirl and Amber Waves in Boogie Nights.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2021, 08:50:40 AM »
Hannibal Lecter lifting up that guard to crucify him on he cage. And setting up all the great lighting.

icehaven

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2021, 09:06:01 AM »
The thousands of deformed, wailing dinosaur mutants that were created before they got the science right in Jurassic Park.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2021, 09:27:15 AM »
Superman eating a big meal and taking off his suit before bed.

Batman putting on his suit and makeup and also when he suddenly disappears rudely when chatting to law enforcement or romantic interests. Does he tiptoe away? He's very quiet.

The funeral Dougal did.


pigamus

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #5 on: March 13, 2021, 09:29:25 AM »
Any of the sex scenes filmed between Rollergirl and Amber Waves in Boogie Nights.

So they exist do they?

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #6 on: March 13, 2021, 09:32:52 AM »
Ripley in hypersleep for 57 years.

icehaven

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #7 on: March 13, 2021, 10:25:17 AM »
Jake Blues eating 4 fried chickens.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #8 on: March 13, 2021, 10:49:43 AM »
Vincent Vega hanging around Butch Coolidge’s apartment before deciding to read his book on the toilet.

bgmnts

  • Depressed to the point of poisonous toxicity.
Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #9 on: March 13, 2021, 10:52:11 AM »
Cliche as fuck but I'd actually like to see the armed robbery in Reservoir Dogs.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #10 on: March 13, 2021, 12:12:53 PM »
The Wicked Witch of the East looking up at a house rapidly descending onto her.

Fr.Bigley

  • Shall I boil this kettle dry?
Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #11 on: March 13, 2021, 12:19:03 PM »
Hannibal scrolling on comparison sites for car insurance, Likewise being frustrated at the rudeness of a call centre agent when trying to cancel his direct debit with Thames water.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #12 on: March 13, 2021, 12:21:27 PM »
Vincent Vega hanging around Butch Coolidge’s apartment before deciding to read his book on the toilet.

I thought that! Couldn't be arsed posting it.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #13 on: March 13, 2021, 01:20:08 PM »
The Kraken being killed between Pirates of the Caribbean 2 and 3. The scripts for those movies are so messy they never even explain what happened to it, it's just suddenly a beached corpse at the beginning of 3 and then it's never mentioned again.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #14 on: March 13, 2021, 01:45:53 PM »
The Kraken being killed between Pirates of the Caribbean 2 and 3. The scripts for those movies are so messy they never even explain what happened to it, it's just suddenly a beached corpse at the beginning of 3 and then it's never mentioned again.
I've not seen it since the cinema, but I remember some (very brief) mention that Tom Hollander ordered Davy Jones to kill it.

mothman

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #15 on: March 13, 2021, 01:54:28 PM »
I thought that! Couldn't be arsed posting it.

Will now spend the rest of the day mildly obsessing over the fact that I could be arsed to, and what it says about me as a person.

Cliche as fuck but I'd actually like to see the armed robbery in Reservoir Dogs.

Thing is though the “obviously psychotic member of an otherwise tightly controlled hold-up gang hold-up team goes gorily off script” trope has been done to death since (and probably before). It was even in an episode of Justified.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #16 on: March 13, 2021, 02:13:23 PM »
I've not seen it since the cinema, but I remember some (very brief) mention that Tom Hollander ordered Davy Jones to kill it.

Ah yeah, now that you mention it that rings a bell. Still, I'd love to see how that battle played out.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #17 on: March 13, 2021, 02:17:27 PM »
He took it to the vets and had it put to sleep.

dr beat

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #18 on: March 13, 2021, 02:19:43 PM »
I heard it went to live on a farm with an old lady.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #19 on: March 13, 2021, 02:42:13 PM »
Poochie's death on the way back to his home planet.

Fr.Bigley

  • Shall I boil this kettle dry?
Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #20 on: March 13, 2021, 02:43:18 PM »
Poochie's death on the way back to his home planet.

Brilliant.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #21 on: March 13, 2021, 03:20:35 PM »
Andy halfway through digging his tunnel with his feet sticking out of the hole

beanheadmcginty

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #22 on: March 13, 2021, 03:25:03 PM »
The coach at the end of the Italian Job falling into the ravine and exploding in a ball of fire.

Fr.Bigley

  • Shall I boil this kettle dry?
Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #23 on: March 13, 2021, 03:27:25 PM »
Gwyneth Paltrows head accident in Seven.

mothman

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #24 on: March 13, 2021, 04:04:35 PM »
Mind you, most of the deaths in Se7en happen offscreen... not sure you’d want to watch any of them though. No, not even Lust.

Fr.Bigley

  • Shall I boil this kettle dry?
Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #25 on: March 13, 2021, 04:06:35 PM »
Mind you, most of the deaths in Se7en happen offscreen... not sure you’d want to watch any of them though. No, not even Lust.

Truth, although gluttony would just be an episode of man vs food and I like that sort of thing.

mothman

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #26 on: March 13, 2021, 04:08:01 PM »
Didn’t get a promotional t-shirt at the end though.

Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #27 on: April 02, 2021, 02:58:35 PM »
Buried (2010)

The kidnappers repeatedly burying one of themselves, to test whether Ryan Reynolds' phone will get a signal underground.

notjosh

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #28 on: April 03, 2021, 10:35:47 PM »
Just any kind of complicated trap that a baddy has to actually make. Jigsaw on a Saturday morning gluing razor blades onto the inside of some rollerskates and getting flustered whenever one snaps off. The workmen who put Cube together having to explain to the designer that the sound-activated furnace is fundamentally unsound as the heat will melt the sensors.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Things that happened offscreen that you'd like to see onscreen
« Reply #29 on: April 03, 2021, 10:40:25 PM »
Someone actually using the Three Sea Shells.

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