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March 29, 2024, 12:09:25 AM

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Lee Hurst having a normal one, again

Started by Kankurette, March 19, 2021, 08:53:36 PM

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Kankurette

As soon as Greta discovers cock, she'll stop complaining about the single use plastic it's wrapped in.



I love how an autistic teenage girl lives rent free in the heads of middle-aged right-wing men. And now he's playing the 'lol it's just a joke you sheep' card. Seriously, what is it about Greta Thunberg that makes them post their weird sex fantasies about her?

(I'm not sure if this should be in Comedy Chat or not, apologies)

Sebastian Cobb

I saw that earlier, the replies were pretty brutal, just wall-to-wall people calling him a nonce.

I feel like it's the kind of joke that would lead even Dappa Laughs to think 'nah, best not'.

I liked it better when he guessed who third division footballers were by pretending to touch their willy and pointing out that Gary Lineker has large ears.  Can't he just go back to doing that again?  Just let him grope Herbie Hide while blindfolded, and all the badly-written reactionary crap he comes out with might stop.

Buelligan

Not only is it deeply offensive, misogynistic, degrading to men, arrogant and plain vile, it's also obviously stupid.  What about all the people who've already seen the cock and still care about the fucking planet?  Sad weird old twat.

Kankurette

Me too. I seem to remember he used to be a lefty and then he went to the opposite extreme. I guess there's money to be made in gammonry. His jokes in general aren't funny but this is a new low.
Quote from: Buelligan on March 19, 2021, 09:01:31 PM
Not only is it deeply offensive, misogynistic, arrogant and plain vile, it's also obviously stupid.  What about all the people who've already seen the cock and still care about the fucking planet?  Sad weird old twat.
Exactly. You can use condoms and still be into saving the environment.

king_tubby

Also johnnies are made of rubber, hence the name 'rubber johnny', and not 'plastic johnny'. He hasn't even done the most basic research!

Blue Jam

The replies to that are glorious.

Also using johnnies instead of having babies is actually very good for the environment.

Kankurette

"I'm not a conservative." No, Lee. You really are.

Mr Banlon

He's been waiting ages to tweet that hasn't he ? I surprised he waited nearly 3 months after her 18th birthday. The dirty bollocks.

flotemysost

Yes, my first thought was "each to their own but why has he been wrapping his knob in plastic?".

I've seen variations over the years on a similar-ish joke, "My girlfriend was one of those environmentalist vegans before she met me... but I soon had her eating meat/consuming small creatures/etc. on a regular basis, know what I mean LOL!!!" - which is just as hackneyed, unimaginative, creepy and also plain illogical, but at least it makes a bit more sense structurally - if you're even failing to coherently make a desperate sub-Gary nonce joke then it's not looking great.

Midas


Consignia

Quote from: Kankurette on March 19, 2021, 08:53:36 PM
(I'm not sure if this should be in Comedy Chat or not, apologies)

Nah, GB is suitable for a philosopher such as Hurst. See the last time we discussed his thoughtful debate on the rights and wrongs of torture: https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,58085.0.html

Shoulders?-Stomach!

The more we talk about him the more the left wins.

Quote from: Consignia on March 19, 2021, 09:41:11 PM
Nah, GB is suitable for a philosopher such as Hurst. See the last time we discussed his thoughtful debate on the rights and wrongs of torture: https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,58085.0.html

It's how I picture parlour games work in right wing households - torture will play a part in every logic puzzle or piece of word play

Imagine being Rory McGrath, reading these tweets, and remembering that Lee Hurst was the funny one?

king_tubby

I don't think Rory McGrath remembers much at all.


Kankurette

Quote from: Consignia on March 19, 2021, 09:41:11 PM
Nah, GB is suitable for a philosopher such as Hurst. See the last time we discussed his thoughtful debate on the rights and wrongs of torture: https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,58085.0.html
My favourite post from that thread:
Quote from: Lemming on January 28, 2017, 04:13:28 PM
Not only is your baby tied to a time bomb, but you're also a vegetarian and this scenario is taking place on a desert island where the only source of food is a cow you'll have to kill and eat to avoid starvation, and there's also an out-of-control trolley speeding down a track towards 5 people, but there's a switch in front of you that will steer the trolley towards a track with only 1 person on instead, and you're also on a sinking lifeboat where the only way to keep it afloat is to throw an injured, unconscious woman off into the ocean, and also you're hiding from the gestapo and a baby is crying and the only way to stop it is to smother it.

Given the circumstances, I think I'd torture Lee Hurst.

chveik

Quote from: Mr Banlon on March 19, 2021, 09:16:45 PM
He's been waiting ages to tweet that hasn't he ? I surprised he waited nearly 3 months after her 18th birthday. The dirty bollocks.

a lot of cunts didn't wait to make those jokes. not only he's a creep but he's also a very slow one

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

A barely of legal age young woman.

Who came to prominence while still a teenager.

And who still looks like a child.

DrGreggles

Quote from: king_tubby on March 19, 2021, 09:55:37 PM
I don't think Rory McGrath remembers much at all.

He tends to remember that he's barred.

Glebe


idunnosomename

Thunberg is a great person doing good work but making a bronze statue of her at Winchester University is dumb as hell

https://www.hampshirechronicle.co.uk/news/19166479.greta-thunberg-statue-winchester-university-criticised/

lee hurst is a perpetually unfunny cunt of course

flotemysost

Quote from: Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse on March 19, 2021, 10:32:31 PM
A barely of legal age young woman.

Yet one who's already achieved far more than most of these losers slobbering their hate-wank fantasies all over Twitter ever will.

Kankurette

Quote from: flotemysost on March 19, 2021, 10:44:37 PM
Yet one who's already achieved far more than most of these losers slobbering their hate-wank fantasies all over Twitter ever will.
I honestly don't know how she copes with it all. If I got a tenth of the abuse she did, I'd have a mental breakdown.

Tony Tony Tony


bgmnts

Fair play thats a fucking horrid thing to say really.

Good god.

idunnosomename

i mean fair play it's a bloody good likeness. but statues, but weird imo. lee hurst might jizz over it, that sort of thing

flotemysost

Quote from: Buelligan on March 19, 2021, 09:01:31 PM
What about all the people who've already seen the cock and still care about the fucking planet?  Sad weird old twat.

Yep, like it's one or the other - as if not one of the multitudes of people who's ever agreed with Greta/generally given a shit about the future of this earth at any point, has ever enjoyed a condom-clad penis, ever. No cock on a dead planet mate.

Much like the other piss poor joke I mentioned in my earlier post, it's just the same old idea that sex (which can only ever start and end with cocks, obvs) is something that women and girls have to be coaxed into, it's not like it's something they might inherently be interested in already, without some sad old weirdo giving them permission to - but once this transformative process has happened there's no going back, and they need to put away childish things like trying to ensure we have a habitable planet for future generations.

Quote from: Blue Jam on March 19, 2021, 09:04:21 PM
Also using johnnies instead of having babies is actually very good for the environment.

And this. He really hasn't thought this through, has he.

idunnosomename

lee hurst is extraordinarily bad at making jokes of any kind. i don't really remember anything about him on TTIAO. ahh, Rory McGrath, very smart man, also sex pest. but lee hurst. just... bald?