Author Topic: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?  (Read 6095 times)

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #180 on: April 07, 2021, 07:28:22 PM »
Trio, Tri-ee-oo, I want a trio and [your father is a homosexual]

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #181 on: April 07, 2021, 07:29:02 PM »
Excellent posting there, Video Game Fan 2000. Absolutely stellar stuff. Right at the top of a new page.

JesusAndYourBush

  • Earnest silky coconut shell
    • http://www.google.com
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #182 on: April 08, 2021, 12:15:21 PM »
What has a hazelnut in every bite?

Squirrel shit!

pigamus

  • Member
  • **
  • Sex, death, mayonnaise.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #183 on: April 08, 2021, 01:33:10 PM »
Blue Riband

Were those the polystyrene ones with chocolate substitute painted on

Those were an insult, I’d rather have had nothing

Replies From View

  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
  • Golden Member
  • *****
  • Gargoyles have milk bags.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #184 on: April 08, 2021, 04:52:23 PM »
P-p-pick up an STD

markburgle

  • A flavourless mush I call Rootmarm
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #185 on: April 08, 2021, 05:22:25 PM »
Blue Riband

Were those the polystyrene ones with chocolate substitute painted on

Those were an insult, I’d rather have had nothing

If you want to talk disappointing, I got a pack of these McVities Hot Cross Bun flavour slices today:

https://appyshop.co.uk/store-245/bakery/cakes-2/mcvities-hot-cross-bun-slices-5pack-5000168026329

They were clearly just rebadged christmas ones. I had some nasty christmas-pudding flavoured chocolate digestives of theirs in December. They tasted exactly the same.

pigamus

  • Member
  • **
  • Sex, death, mayonnaise.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #186 on: April 08, 2021, 06:04:42 PM »
P-p-pick up an STD

Penguins are actually pretty rough, aren’t they? Kind of gritty and sickly and cheap-tasting.

purlieu

  • Gertrude Stein said that's enough.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #187 on: April 08, 2021, 06:11:48 PM »
You wouldn’t want to have unwrapped biscuits in that rusty tin mate, trust me.
Maybe if you'd stopped buying posh biscuits instead of Basics Custard Creams you'd have been able to afford a new biscuit tin.

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #188 on: April 08, 2021, 09:19:04 PM »
Penguins are actually pretty rough, aren’t they? Kind of gritty and sickly and cheap-tasting.

Yes.

The worst part about Penguins (apart from the taste) is the wrappers: they're all different colours. They're all different: red, green, blue etc so you naturally assume they're gonna be different flavours: strawberry, mint, blueberry etc (yum yum), but they're not. The fillings are all just that nasty, cheap, faux-choc shite.




Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #189 on: April 08, 2021, 09:23:15 PM »
Of course they're shit, someone saw the success of covering things in chocolate (digestives, hobnobs, kendal mint cake) and thought 'I could do that with a bourbon' without realising you're just adding cheap shitty chocolate to cheap shitty chocolate biscuits.

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #190 on: April 08, 2021, 09:29:45 PM »
They're pretty toothachy. Hated them.

Got a clear memory of going over to another kids house and his mum asking him if he wanted 'sweet' after we had dinner and she inverted a whole tub of penguins over the coffee table and walked off leaving him to grab about five or six and left the wrappers on the floor. Another night at the same place the kid announced "I'm tired I'm going to bed" and he just turned face down on the setee and slept there apparently all night, that was 'going to bed' in his house. I went home.


mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #191 on: April 08, 2021, 10:56:12 PM »
Yeah but you haven’t lived until you’ve Penguined a cup of tea. Bite off two opposite corners, wrap the wrapper around, stick one end in your tea and then suck really hard. Once you get tea coming through, gobble the whole thing. Lovely.

Thomas

  • please describe an encounter with a squirrel
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #192 on: April 08, 2021, 11:00:40 PM »
wrap the wrapper around, stick one end in your tea and then suck really hard. Once you get tea coming through, gobble the whole thing. Lovely.

Whenever I do this, I roll over to find that my mum has left me a second cup of tea on the bedside table.

purlieu

  • Gertrude Stein said that's enough.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #193 on: April 08, 2021, 11:42:29 PM »
The penguin tea thing works even better with strawberry milk. I used to do that a lot as a teenager.

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #194 on: April 09, 2021, 12:01:06 AM »
I find it works better if you take a penguin, leave the wrapper on, get a cup of tea and then shove both all the way up your fucking arsehole.

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #195 on: April 09, 2021, 04:14:22 AM »
Whenever I do this, I roll over to find that my mum has left me a cup of tea on the bedside table.

The other day someone posted that 50s pic of the (dead), old guy bummin' himself with huge torpedo-like things, and I noticed there was a nice cup of tea on his bedside cabinet. Fancy that, I thought, his poor Mum.


Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #196 on: April 09, 2021, 04:26:45 AM »
I can't find that pic, but I found this one of an Italian wanker at Pompei, instead. Could that be a cup (or a bowl) of tea* near his right shoulder? Left by his Mama?

*Or whatever the ancient Naples-ees drank.



EDITED TO ASK. How many, even on this Forum, would be so focused that they'd continue wanking even as they're being roasted alive? Not many, I bet.
« Last Edit: April 09, 2021, 05:20:01 AM by steve98 »

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #197 on: April 09, 2021, 05:09:02 AM »
I can't find that pic, but I found this one of a Greek wanker at Pompei, instead. Could that be a cup (or a bowl) of tea* near his right shoulder? Left by his Mama?

*Or whatever the ancient Greeks drank.



EDITED TO ASK.

How many, even on this Forum, would be so focused that they'd continue wanking even as they're being roasted alive? .


Consignia

  • Deviant
  • Silver Member
  • ****
  • 저는 사과예요
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #198 on: April 09, 2021, 08:56:42 AM »
Yes.

The worst part about Penguins (apart from the taste) is the wrappers: they're all different colours. They're all different: red, green, blue etc so you naturally assume they're gonna be different flavours: strawberry, mint, blueberry etc (yum yum), but they're not. The fillings are all just that nasty, cheap, faux-choc shite.



They did used to different flavoured penguins, like mint, orange etc. and they'd be colour coded as you'd imagine. Obviously too much flavour for some people, so reverted back to any flavour you like as long as it's basic chocolate.

buttgammon

  • Magnums (Magna)
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #199 on: April 09, 2021, 08:57:30 AM »
They did used to different flavoured penguins, like mint, orange etc. and they'd be colour coded as you'd imagine. Obviously too much flavour for some people, so reverted back to any flavour you like as long as it's basic chocolate.

Can't speak for any other flavours but they still do mint - I had one recently, having forgotten they existed for many years.

H-O-W-L

  • Front Toward Enemy
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #200 on: April 09, 2021, 09:06:56 AM »
No need for embarrassment or even a visit to the doctor, a good pharmacist will soon sort it out (if they're not out of their fucking mind on drugs, of course).

I've never seen one of these Gold biscuits btw, let alone, tasted one.  Imagine.


pigamus

  • Member
  • **
  • Sex, death, mayonnaise.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #201 on: April 09, 2021, 09:16:30 AM »
Can't speak for any other flavours but they still do mint - I had one recently, having forgotten they existed for many years.

Asda do knockoff mint ones called Puffins, or they did, and they’re better than the proper ones

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

  • I just want to tell you I've got scabs on my head.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #202 on: April 09, 2021, 09:28:25 AM »
Yeah but you haven’t lived until you’ve Penguined a cup of tea. Bite off two opposite corners, wrap the wrapper around, stick one end in your tea and then suck really hard. Once you get tea coming through, gobble the whole thing. Lovely.

First all that nonsense in the " terrible news" thread, and now THIS monstrosity. Well, that is fucking it. I'm leaving this fucked- up place FOREVER. Enjoy the last twitches of the knifed- up multi- millionaire  cunt, kids.

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #203 on: April 09, 2021, 11:04:51 AM »
EDITED TO ASK. How many, even on this Forum, would be so focused that they'd continue wanking even as they're being roasted alive? Not many, I bet.

That just reminds me of the story - where was it from? - about the plane that was about to crash, so everyone starts wanking furiously. But then the pilot recovers control and everyone stops and pretends nothing happened.

First all that nonsense in the " terrible news" thread, and now THIS monstrosity. Well, that is fucking it. I'm leaving this fucked- up place FOREVER. Enjoy the last twitches of the knifed- up multi- millionaire  cunt, kids.

Yeah, right. If Jodie did it you’d literally explode with lust.

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #204 on: April 09, 2021, 11:24:36 AM »
Asda do knockoff mint ones called Puffins, or they did, and they’re better than the proper ones

Ah yes "Puffins", that's what the knock-off one's are called (I misremembered them as "kakapos").


Gurke and Hare

  • Fold water. Roll into small cubes.
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #205 on: April 09, 2021, 12:24:01 PM »
Can't speak for any other flavours but they still do mint - I had one recently, having forgotten they existed for many years.

They still do orange too. Honestly, this thread's like a boomer facebook group going "Do you remember Curly Wurlies?"

JesusAndYourBush

  • Earnest silky coconut shell
    • http://www.google.com
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #206 on: April 10, 2021, 03:21:07 PM »
They still do orange too. Honestly, this thread's like a boomer facebook group going "Do you remember Curly Wurlies?"

I remember there were several different sized Curly Wurly's.  The biggest was about 2 feet long.
Or maybe it just seemed bigger because I was a kid.

JesusAndYourBush

  • Earnest silky coconut shell
    • http://www.google.com
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #207 on: April 13, 2021, 12:18:42 AM »
Yeah but you haven’t lived until you’ve Penguined a cup of tea. Bite off two opposite corners, wrap the wrapper around, stick one end in your tea and then suck really hard. Once you get tea coming through, gobble the whole thing. Lovely.

I did this this evening!  (I didn't wrap the wrapper around, just held it in my hand.)  I almost made the mistake of trying to take a bite of the tead-up penguin before realising how soft and crumbly it was becoming and managed to shove the whole thing in my gob just moments before it'd have fallen to bits and landed back in the cup of tea.  It was an awesome chocolate explosion in the mouth.  I fully recommend it!

mothman

  • I don't know why
Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #208 on: April 13, 2021, 09:57:32 AM »
I did this this evening!  (I didn't wrap the wrapper around, just held it in my hand.)  I almost made the mistake of trying to take a bite of the tead-up penguin before realising how soft and crumbly it was becoming and managed to shove the whole thing in my gob just moments before it'd have fallen to bits and landed back in the cup of tea.  It was an awesome chocolate explosion in the mouth.  I fully recommend it!



Next, dogging.

Re: Is the McVities Gold bar a minor confection?
« Reply #209 on: April 13, 2021, 02:44:55 PM »
I can't find that pic, but I found this one of an Italian wanker at Pompei, instead. Could that be a cup (or a bowl) of tea* near his right shoulder? Left by his Mama?

*Or whatever the ancient Naples-ees drank.



EDITED TO ASK. How many, even on this Forum, would be so focused that they'd continue wanking even as they're being roasted alive? Not many, I bet.
At least he died doing what he loved.
Yeah but you haven’t lived until you’ve Penguined a cup of tea. Bite off two opposite corners, wrap the wrapper around, stick one end in your tea and then suck really hard. Once you get tea coming through, gobble the whole thing. Lovely.
That's like that thing Aussies do with Tim Tams, which are Aussie Penguins. Using it like a chocolatey biscuity straw.

Tags: