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Friendly Neighbourhood Tories

Started by greencalx, April 03, 2021, 09:59:51 AM

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Shoulders?-Stomach!


Sherringford Hovis



These two Tories on the right are husband and wife. In the flesh, q.v. Milhouse's Mom and Dad, they're so creepily similar-looking it's unnerving; couldn't find a pic where they're both wearing specs for that full-on Can I Borrow A Feeling.
Typical small-town busy-bodies that get to be mayor every three or four years because nobody else gives a shit, tolerated because they get a lot of the unsexy town council stuff done, but now they're standing for County Council it's a tiny bit sad how little anyone cares, not a single one of the local Tories give enough of a monkey's to help with their campaign. Out in the rain hand-delivering their own leaflets to the town's cold, unfeeling letterboxes one hopes that their soggy Damascene moment is not too far off.

Rizla

Quote from: Phoenix Lazarus on April 03, 2021, 12:59:29 PM
This fella's standing in our ward and I can't think of anything snide to say about him so, the rest of you, get your creative minds working.


He's dumped half a bottle of copydex on his stupid cunt tory head and swandived into a barber's midden.

idunnosomename

Quote from: GoblinAhFuckScary on April 03, 2021, 07:00:51 PM
Making me think of this photo of Mike Weatherley, who was my old tory MP


sadly iron maiden are probably all tories, even discounting aces high and trooper patriotism stuff.

lyrics to Age of Innocence from 2003 are straight out of the daily mail. ironically, shattered my own adolescent age of innocence that your artistic heroes weren't cunts.

even Bruce voted leave fucksake.

GoblinAhFuckScary

Perhaps, but still there's this wonderful illustration from Killers


SpiderChrist

#35
Had a questionnaire through the door from some Tory bastard who wants to be a councillor. Asking about what people felt their priorities were as we "build back better". Filled it in for him, answered "Tories" to any questions about what I was concerned about, and returned it with a polite note requesting that he didn't send me any more letters etc. as "I don't put excrement through your letterbox and would ask that you refrain from doing the same to me".

Anyone, ANYONE willing to stand as a Conservative candidate at whatever level is clearly a good for nothing cunt with no moral compass.

ETA: and Iron Maiden are fucking shit

poodlefaker

Note to young Tory guys: taking your tie off and undoing your top button does not make you look relaxed and approachable.

greencalx


SpiderChrist

Note to young Tory guys: taking your tie off and undoing your top button does not make you look relaxed and approachable. wrapping it tightly round your neck so it constricts your breathing is the best way to a happier Britain SpiderChrist.

Dr Trouser

You'd think that looking at this friendly chap he's earnest, but a little shy, slightly uncomfortable in a suit and tie (got to do it for the man, kids) and keen to help the community



but no, he's our Tory MSP candidate and is a weapons grade cunt.

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

Note to young Tory guys: Fuck Off, you cunts.

Quote from: SpiderChrist on April 06, 2021, 07:03:04 AM
Iron Maiden are fucking shit

Except Run for the Hills and Number of the Beast.

SpiderChrist

Quote from: Phoenix Lazarus on April 06, 2021, 09:55:06 AM
Except Run for the Hills and Number of the Beast.

Especially Run for the Hills and Number of the Beast.

seepage

Look, now they've got us fighting each other instead of our common enemy, Friendly Neighbourhood Tories.

Paul Calf

Quote from: idunnosomename on April 05, 2021, 10:05:22 PM

...lyrics to Age of Innocence from 2003 are straight out of the daily mail...

I'm shocked by how accurate a criticism this is.

Quote
A life of petty crime gets punished with a holiday
The victims' mind are scarred for life most everyday
Assailants know just how much further they can go
They know the laws are soft, conviction chances low

Gurke and Hare

I've just googled those lyrics, and they read like a poem sent in by a reader of a local newspaper. A particularly bad one, too.

GoblinAhFuckScary


idunnosomename

Steve Harris should write an epic about Brexit on the next album with his signature prosaically descriptive lyrics and the one chord progression he's been using for the last 25 years

Dex Sawash

I saw Iron Maiden live 1983ish. Girlfriend insisted due to opening act Loverboy. It was too loud and I left after 2 maiden songs.
218 I was (I reckon she was 15 but fuck off we went to same school)

Glebe


greencalx

Ha ha - Randall's the only one who doesn't look photoshopped into that picture.

idunnosomename

Quote from: GoblinAhFuckScary on April 06, 2021, 01:07:53 AM
Perhaps, but still there's this wonderful illustration from Killers



I shouldn't read too much into it, but that they did a role-reversal for the Women in Uniform single later in 1980 reeks of ahhh both sides. even back then.



can't think steve harris has voted anything other than tory. in a way, they're Thatcherite boom working-class millionaires.

easytarget

Quote from: idunnosomename on April 05, 2021, 10:05:22 PM

even Bruce voted leave fucksake.
private school innit?

I like to imagine the rest of them are alright (though obviously Age of Innocence makes that harder to accept).

GoblinAhFuckScary