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March 19, 2024, 02:03:50 PM

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Saying goodbye to a pet

Started by BritishHobo, April 06, 2021, 08:51:23 PM

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BritishHobo

I've just dropped my cat off at out-of-hours vet, and I've fully had a breakdown in the car park, like full-on panic attack like I've never had before. He might not even die, probably. He's got a fucked-up bladder and they've drained it, but he needs constant monitoring overnight in case it gets blocked up again. If he's alright then they'll whack him on medication, but maybe not. Maybe not. I had a brave face on it until the day-vets gave me him in his carrier  to take him on to nighttime-vets. Then I went into full-on no-breath, black-fear freakout. Was talking over the insurance details at the day-vets, but I realised in the car that I didn't give a fuck. I'd drain my savings if it meant he's okay. Why are we such fucking gibbons, so fucking thick that we only realise this shit when it's too late? I think if he dies I might actually crumble.

BritishHobo

At least Paul Ritter can give my cat a cuddle

Emma Raducanu

When my fish die, I chuck them down the drain and go about my day. I can understand building a relationship with a dog and going hiking with them and camping together and driving round with the windows down.

Buelligan

Really incredibly sorry about this.  Dunno if it helps but when I had to leave Eddie at a vets, years ago, I had a full public weeping thing.  A lot worse - in the sense that it was far less controlled - than when I walked away from my mum's hospice.  Fucking hell man, solidarity to you.  I think it's because we know we are their keepers and their guardians.  Very very best to you. 

bgmnts

More gibbon insults!

Seriously though I'm sorry. Death comes for us all, even cats.

It's never pleasant but you can console yourself to the fact that he'll either be in cat heaven, shitting in God's flower garden, or he'll just cease to be and will have surely had a good fulfilling life.


BritishHobo

Quote from: DolphinFace on April 06, 2021, 08:58:16 PM
When my fish die, I chuck them down the drain and go about my day. I can understand building a relationship with a dog and going hiking with them and camping together and driving round with the windows down.

When my fish died I insisted on buying them in the garden. My mum very gently tried to tell me I was being a stupid dickhead, and that everyone else is perfectly happy flushing theirs down the shitter. I wasn't having it. She was right in the end obviously, as I never bothered to visit their garden grave, and eventually my dad built a shed on it.

Emma Raducanu

I don't really throw them down the drain. I was a bit sad when the first couple died after 4 years of feeding them flakes and cleaning shit from the substrate but really, I barely register a flicker of emotion if one goes now.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

BritishHobo, I'm so sorry to hear that. I have a geriatric dog, love of my life, and while he's a lively old man I know that sooner rather than later he'll break my heart. All I can say is that if the vets thought there was nothing they could do, they'd tell you that. It's a good sign that they're treating him, he must have a chance if they are. Keeping my fingers crossed for you and your kitty.

flotemysost

Really sorry to hear that, and I think that's a very understandable response to have. When one of my childhood cats died my dad had to leave work early as he was so distraught, they sent him a sympathy card and all which was very sweet. Best wishes to you both.

holyzombiejesus

Sorry to hear that Hobo. My cat's nearly 17 so I know that feeling of anxiety. Hope you're ok.

Neomod

Sadly it's the price we pay for the years of pleasure they give us. Thankfully our cat died in his sleep at the wheel of his bus lying in the sun in next doors garden.

Still in bits though as I was tasked to bury him in the family garden.

The new owners are going to get a shock if they decide to start growing vegetables.

JaDanketies

Lots of e-hugs for OP. Thoughts are with you.

The Viking / Pharoah funeral is nice for pets. All their favourite treasures with them. But however you and their other loved ones say goodbye to them is absolutely perfect too. There's always time for a respectful visit to them and word with them. Talk to them whenever you want to. They might hear, who knows. 

Chedney Honks

My wife bought me a sword a few years ago. When my cats go, that's me done. I won't go into any more detail.

Dex Sawash


I just say Auf Wiedersehen, Pet

Pink Gregory

We went through exactly the same thing (emergency vet) and through the next few months we said goodbye so many times but fortune of fortunes he's still with us.  I'd like to think his little brush with the reaper has steeled us for the inevitability, but I imagine that courage will immediately dissapate when he finally slows down.

Still, good boy.

Kankurette

Quote from: BritishHobo on April 06, 2021, 08:51:23 PM
I've just dropped my cat off at out-of-hours vet, and I've fully had a breakdown in the car park, like full-on panic attack like I've never had before. He might not even die, probably. He's got a fucked-up bladder and they've drained it, but he needs constant monitoring overnight in case it gets blocked up again. If he's alright then they'll whack him on medication, but maybe not. Maybe not. I had a brave face on it until the day-vets gave me him in his carrier  to take him on to nighttime-vets. Then I went into full-on no-breath, black-fear freakout. Was talking over the insurance details at the day-vets, but I realised in the car that I didn't give a fuck. I'd drain my savings if it meant he's okay. Why are we such fucking gibbons, so fucking thick that we only realise this shit when it's too late? I think if he dies I might actually crumble.
Fingers crossed for you and catte. My old boy Dougie died a couple of years ago and he was a pain in the arse, but I loved him. He died in transit to the vet, so at least he went peacefully and I didn't have to watch him be put down (like Mum did with her cat last year), but the vet let us have some quiet time together and I just cuddled him and sobbed into his fur.

Pink Gregory

Oh god, I took Oscar for some tests a few weeks ago, and while I was sorting out insurance etc at the counter, an older couple - clearly shaken and emotional - came in to have their old dog friend put to the sleep.  Vet gave them the talk and went to go and check on him, and he'd died in the kennel.  Will probably not forget that for quite a while.  Horrid business.

Thomas

Thoughts are with you, BritishHobo and BritishCat. If the saddest does happen, I'll come and help you tear down the Ianto Jones memorial and replace it with something worthwhile.

We took a stray cat in three years ago, and were quite anguished when he was diagnosed early on with feline leukemia (a common condition in strays). When they gave me the call with the test results, they asked if I still wanted to bother having him microchipped (not in quite such harsh words), a question I found surprisingly upsetting. We'd only had him about a week (still got him, safely microchipped).

Wonderful Butternut

That's awful, fingers crossed mate. He'll pull through. As Poirot says, if there was nothing that could be done for him the vet would tell you.

Put down a 15 year old tom a few years ago. A fine specimen who weighed 14 lbs at his peak without being fat had just gone into nothing and was clearly on his last legs. You could tell picking him up that he had no strength left in him. Vet reckoned kidney failure but needed to do blood tests to be certain before pumping him full of meds. Even though I knew it wasn't fair to try and drag a few more weeks of life out of him (assuming he'd even lasted until the blood test came back), I still teared up when the vet said "okay, he's gone." after giving him the injection.

Vet was the spit and image of my ex to add to the experience. Only the Northern Ireland accent stopped me from checking whether it was her.

And now at the moment I have one who's been missing for a week and a half. Got a bit upset making the 'missing cat' poster a few days ago (has generated a couple of leads, but no cat so far). There aren't natural boundaries around here to stop him from coming back, and he hides from strangers. So if he's alright, he should just come back...

What I'm holding onto is that:

1) The only obvious thing that's fatal to a cat around here are the roads and I haven't found him dead on any of them.

2) Recently one of my Dad's cats sodded off for a fortnight and then came back. And she's been with them for 4 years.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy


Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

Quote from: Pink Gregory on April 06, 2021, 10:55:04 PM
Oh god, I took Oscar for some tests a few weeks ago, and while I was sorting out insurance etc at the counter, an older couple - clearly shaken and emotional - came in to have their old dog friend put to the sleep.  Vet gave them the talk and went to go and check on him, and he'd died in the kennel.  Will probably not forget that for quite a while.  Horrid business.
My old man needs monthly injections for his arthritis. Because of COVID everyone has to wait in the car park and you can't go in with your pet, the vet tech comes and takes the pet into surgery. Every other month, when I've been up there someone is having their dog put down in the boot of their car.

I don't like thinking about it. My heart will be fucking broken. But at least I know the name of the local pet crematorium now.

Quote from: Wonderful Butternut on April 06, 2021, 11:29:08 PM
And now at the moment I have one who's been missing for a week and a half. Got a bit upset making the 'missing cat' poster a few days ago (has generated a couple of leads, but no cat so far). There aren't natural boundaries around here to stop him from coming back, and he hides from strangers. So if he's alright, he should just come back...

What I'm holding onto is that:

1) The only obvious thing that's fatal to a cat around here are the roads and I haven't found him dead on any of them.

2) Recently one of my Dad's cats sodded off for a fortnight and then came back. And she's been with them for 4 years.
Fingers crossed for your missing pussycat, WB. Here's hoping he's having a little holiday at someone else's house, the fickle yoke.

checkoutgirl

Quote from: Chedney Honks on April 06, 2021, 10:39:59 PM
My wife bought me a sword a few years ago. When my cats go, that's me done. I won't go into any more detail.

You put it in writing you can't go back on it now.

touchingcloth

Quote from: Wonderful Butternut on April 06, 2021, 11:29:08 PM
That's awful, fingers crossed mate. He'll pull through. As Poirot says, if there was nothing that could be done for him the vet would tell you.

Put down a 15 year old tom a few years ago. A fine specimen who weighed 14 lbs at his peak without being fat had just gone into nothing and was clearly on his last legs. You could tell picking him up that he had no strength left in him. Vet reckoned kidney failure but needed to do blood tests to be certain before pumping him full of meds. Even though I knew it wasn't fair to try and drag a few more weeks of life out of him (assuming he'd even lasted until the blood test came back), I still teared up when the vet said "okay, he's gone." after giving him the injection.

Vet was the spit and image of my ex to add to the experience. Only the Northern Ireland accent stopped me from checking whether it was her.

And now at the moment I have one who's been missing for a week and a half. Got a bit upset making the 'missing cat' poster a few days ago (has generated a couple of leads, but no cat so far). There aren't natural boundaries around here to stop him from coming back, and he hides from strangers. So if he's alright, he should just come back...

What I'm holding onto is that:

1) The only obvious thing that's fatal to a cat around here are the roads and I haven't found him dead on any of them.

2) Recently one of my Dad's cats sodded off for a fortnight and then came back. And she's been with them for 4 years.

One time a post about a missing cat appeared on our local Nextdoor, and got bumped a few times with increasing desperation each time. A week or so later someone posted on the next area's Nextdoor about a loveable stray cat which had decided to make its home with the poster.

I'm sure you can guess the rest, and needless to say the kitnappee was returned.

mothman

Sorry to hear that BH, hope he's OK.

checkoutgirl

Quote from: DolphinFace on April 06, 2021, 09:34:31 PM
I don't really throw them down the drain. I was a bit sad when the first couple died after 4 years of feeding them flakes and cleaning shit from the substrate but really, I barely register a flicker of emotion if one goes now.

It doesn't follow anyway because cats are too big to be flushed down the toilet. Lob in the bin like that woman but unlike her wait for it to die. Sentimentality with pets always eluded me. If a cat was 5 times your size would they show you any mercy? Would they fuck. They'd torture you for hours before they killed you. Remorseless killing machines. Dogs are worse. Ever get chased by a pack of wolves? Didn't think so.

touchingcloth

Quote from: checkoutgirl on April 07, 2021, 12:32:44 AM
It doesn't follow anyway because cats are too big to be flushed down the toilet. Lob in the bin like that woman but unlike her wait for it to die. Sentimentality with pets always eluded me. If a cat was 5 times your size would they show you any mercy? Would they fuck. They'd torture you for hours before they killed you. Remorseless killing machines. Dogs are worse. Ever get chased by a pack of wolves? Didn't think so.

BUGBEAR ALERT

Domestic dogs and cats aren't the same as the wolves and wild/big cats they descended from. They've had at least 10,000 and possibly as long as 50,000 years evolving alongside us, and part of the reason for their cuteness is that "survival of the fittest" for the earliest domesticated/domesticatable predators meant looking to humans like you weren't after killing them to fuck and then eating them. Domesticated cat mewls apparently prod the same brain functions as human baby cries do, probably for the same reason.

An interesting effect of domestication is that it's probably led to today's wild wolves becoming more vicious than their ancestors. The population of modern wolves has evolved during the same period as the population of domestic dogs - it's not that wolves have stayed the same while dogs have hived themselves off to become domestic - so one line of reasoning is that while humans picked out the cuter/friendlier dogwolves to live amongst them, this led to the exiled wolfdogs becoming increasingly estranged from and vicious towards us.

But my cats would eat me, yes.

Mobius

I can't even think about stuff like this

Fairly sure when my cat eventually goes, I'm just gonna join him.

touchingcloth

I have a rescue dog (10 (ten)), two rescue cats (1 (one) & 1 (one)), and a farm moggy (15 (five teen)). I am honestly convinced that none (n0) of the four (4) of them are ever going to get sick or die, and I have a hunch, OP, that your cat is similarly immortal.

Rich Uncle Skeleton

Quote from: touchingcloth on April 07, 2021, 12:23:01 AM
I'm sure you can guess the rest

a fantastic gunfight in the street over a cat!

imitationleather

Even though my cats are only two years old I feel completely sick when I think about them one day dying.

Hopefully I'll go first.