Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 28, 2024, 10:49:27 PM

Login with username, password and session length

False rumours and tall tales that persist about yourself

Started by 23 Daves, July 14, 2005, 07:51:32 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Mates of my ex-girlfriend spread stories around a few years back that I was a major cocaine addict. They didn't like me and were obviously trying to poison her against me. Needless to say, the only drugs I'd touched back then were weed and beer. People seem to think these days that the second you take a drag on a cigarette you become a raving junkie.

Jemble Fred

Quote from: "petula dusty"I found out from my in-laws that my husband told them my dad was killed in the Birmingham pub bombings when actually he died of cancer in 1976.
He also didn't tell them I was pregnant until I'd had the baby.

Seeing as no-one else said, it, allow me to add a 'Fucking hell!' What horrible strangeness.

Frinky

My ex from way back started telling people in the last year that I used to beat her up, which is novel. She's a bit crazy and attentionwhorish, y'see. Many times in the last few months people have come up to me saying "ohmygoddidyoureallyusedtobeatheruphowcouldyoudothat??!"

The novelty for me now is simply not denying it, and instead just saying things like "Wouldn't you hit her?", becuase anyone who's stupid enough to believe it, really needs cutting off from my social circle. So I guess I'm not really helping that rumour die down, although I suspect stupid people would believe it no matter how hard I denied it, becuase it's fun to believe dramatic things like that.

ccab

In my early 20s, a tabloid published several photos of me with a recognisable American actress. Where I live, the myth still persists today that she either had a miscarriage or an abortion. which is a complete fabrication but was enough to sprout a huge ecosysytem of sub-rumours about my lifestyle, almost all untrue, but which I've never been particularly keen to correct.

gazzyk1ns

American actress? Tell us everything.

Hehe I don't think I've ever had an actual "work toilet wanker" rumour spread about me but at a couple of jobs I've had, I'm sure they must have started to think there was something wrong with my guts. You can't reassure them otherwise, can you; "Actually I just go in there, slump on the seat in a cubicle, close my eyes and think 'CHRIST I HATE THIS HELLHOLE!', before preparing myself for another couple of hours of you lot.".... nah, probably won't go down too well. IBS it is!

petula dusty

Jemble Fred wrote

Quote'Fucking hell!' What horrible strangeness


'Petula Dusty, dis is your loif!!' Dahh dah dah daaaaaah[/b]

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: "Shoulders?-Stomach!""Polo's make you impotent so eat a whole packet before sex."
That is actually partly true.  Polo mints DO reduce male fertility - it was a news item sometime between July 1985 and August 1986.  Although maybe they've changed the recipe since then (like they did with Trebor Mints), I dunno.

I can be so sure of the date because I remember bringing it up at work in a certain office I worked in (my first).  I'd just stuck my head round the MD's office to say goodnight (it was a very small company, ~20 people, and we were all very friendly), and the Finance DIrector who was in there offered me a Polo.  I grinned and declined, repeating what had been on the news.

"Oh bloody hell," he said, jokingly, "I'd better neck the lot then, I can go out on the pull without worries."

"In my case," said the MD, "I just thread them on."

Ahhh....when I didn't used to work for a bunch of cunts.

Ambient Sheep

Meanwhile, disappointingly, I can't remember a single rumour about myself.  I guess I've never been interesting enough to make stuff up about.  Or nobody's ever told me.

The only rumours that anybody might have about me now are probably true.  Unless it's gazzyk1ns that's starting them.  ;-)

gazzyk1ns

Oh yes, that reminds me, here's that link you've been pestering me for.

;-) back atcha!

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"Oh yes, that reminds me, here's that link you've been pestering me for.
You've lost me I'm afraid Gazzy, as there's no indication of that torrent's content, and I don't have a torrenting client.

I assume it's some sort of perviness I'm supposed to be into?  Either that, or an episode of Enterprise.  ;-)

gazzyk1ns

Hehe no, sorry, it was just a database programme! Never mind though. I'll get you to watch those Enterprises one day!

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: "gazzyk1ns"Hehe no, sorry, it was just a database programme!
Ah I see...I thought the "database" bit was referring to the page itself, not the contents of the torrent.

Of course you're right on that.  That is an untrue rumour about me, isn't it!?  I suppose I didn't think of it 'cos I just see it as a joke, most of the time.

gazzyk1ns

And so does everyone else, all of the time, don't worry!

You remind me of a mate of mine, I recently said of him "One of my favourite hobbies is winding up [him], I just start to feel guilty when I realise he's taken it seriously!". Sheep nobody thinks you have a database, the closest that type of remark comes to being a "genuine" comment is that you've got a good memory and have learned to use the erratic and illogical search function very well. Saying "Let's get Sheep to look at his database" is "fun talk" for "Let's ask Sheepy, he might be able to shed some light on this matter [because of what I said in the previous sentence]".

Hairy Chin

Ah so THAT'S what the occassional 'database' remarks have been about.
I didn't like to ask as it seemed to tick Sheepy off a bit whenever it was brought up.
I knew waiting was the right thing to do!

As for odd rumours...not sure if its a rumour as such, but somehow  at work I've become the person to ask regarding odd, unusual or perverse sexual practices. I think I made ONE comment once about...hell knows what, probably as either a throwaway remark or a blatantly false accusation about someone else at work; and when nobody knew what it was I had to explain. Now if someone hears some strange word they thing is a deviant practice, they ask me.

I don't know if they think I practice all manner of perverse, degrading, kinky and probably illegal sex-shenanegins or what. In my defence, I don't - I just know vaguely about thngs...most of which I probably picked up from this board.

You dirty fuckers.

Ambient Sheep

Quote from: "Hairy Chin"Ah so THAT'S what the occassional 'database' remarks have been about.  I didn't like to ask as it seemed to tick Sheepy off a bit whenever it was brought up.
Yeah, it's just that 'cos I've been here so long and so often, and have a fairly good memory, especially for things or people that interest me, that I remember a load of useless shit.  Then, when I came out with some obscure fact about a couple of posters twice in quick succession, someone (damn them! :-) ) accused me of having a secret stalker's database of CaB posters' details.   Not surprising really, as it IS the sort of thing that I might do in one of my more retentive moods...but I haven't.  If it were true, it wouldn't piss me off half so much, if at all.  :-)

I sometimes wonder if I should actually make one, just so that I can stop being pissed off...perhaps I should ask the 'whore who DOES actually have one if we could compare notes.

Thanks for the comments by the way gazzyk1ns.