oh no now the queen has died as well

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what a week of madness for the staff of buckinham palace as two corpses have had to be offloaded in as many days


today's corpse is of queen of england, and with a roman numeral "II" after her name like attack of the clones



well hopefully that's it now anyway

[Buelligan]

Don't wish to be a source of concern in your life, dear RFV, but what you've just posted here carries a death sentence.  Have a lovely day, it may well be your last[nb]I won't might make a thread laughing about your demise, I promise you that.  Something good has to come out of all this negativity.  If you are married to a woodlouse, tell it to get its hair done, there may well be photographs.[/nb].  Leave the house now.

[Jockice]

Oh well, these things happen, don't they?

[Butchers Blind]

Let's hope there's a domino effect right up to and including that little shit, Prince George.

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Don't wish to be a source of concern in your life, dear RFV, but what you've just posted here carries a death sentence.

reading out the queens death on the news must carry one as well then


peter sissons soon to shit himself more than ever before

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Let's hope there's a domino effect right up to and including that little shit, Prince George.

butterfly crushing nonce



not you; him

[checkoutgirl]

DMX died at 50 which I thought was much bigger news than the king of Britain dying. I wonder will the royals survive much beyond her Madge. Will people dislike Charlie and just bin the whole thing. Will the Saudis get sick of the king taking 5 jumbo jets and 200 cars everywhere.

[Buelligan]

He's not the King, you insensitive tit.  He's our fucking stepking. 

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Is that a subset of pumpking?

[Buelligan]

Doubt they bother any more tbh, full of holes.

[checkoutgirl]

He's not the King,

Is he not? I heard he was the king of Britain and somehow also the Duke of Wellington, which as as a bog arab myself makes no sense at all. I reckon the french are way ahead of the game lopping royal heads off left right and centre. Mainly centre.

[earl_sleek]

He was never a king - you don't become a king by marrying a queen, though the reverse is usually true - but I agree with you about the French and the heads and whatnot.

[JamesTC]

Bring back the four day week by having a monarch die every Tuesday.

[BlodwynPig]

DMX died at 50 which I thought was much bigger news than the king of Britain dying. I wonder will the royals survive much beyond her Madge. Will people dislike Charlie and just bin the whole thing. Will the Saudis get sick of the king taking 5 jumbo jets and 200 cars everywhere.

As pointed out in the thread, id never heard of him. Ive heard of Snoop, jayz and kanye, so unless im the only non-rap aficionado on the forum, surely this is exaggeration

But sad news about my man DMX

[brat-sampson]

Bring back the four day week by having a monarch die every Tuesday.

I'm sure that could be arranged, the line of succession is surely long enough to last us a good few years.

[checkoutgirl]

As pointed out in the thread, id never heard of him. Ive heard of Snoop, jayz and kanye, so unless im the only non-rap aficionado on the forum, surely this is exaggeration

But sad news about my man DMX

I've heard of DMX cos I used to record shop in the 2000s and saw him covered in blood on an album cover. It's more that he was only 50 which I found shocking and if I'm honest a bit frightening as that's me in a few years . I then check his lifestyle to see if it's unhealthy to try and reassure myself. All very selfish admittedly.

Some old coot whose half dust dying is no news at all. He was dead for 10 years already anyway. This is just final confirmation.

[Buelligan]

I'm sure that could be arranged, the line of succession is surely long enough to last us a good few years.

Maybe they could have a programme on the wireless, every Sunday night, where they pick a name out of a black velvet bag and announce the name, live to the nation. 

[touchingcloth]

Can lizards actually die actually?

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Can lizards actually die actually?

If by this you mean "will BMXs ever go out of fashion" I think that's because you must have been misreading DMX with hilarious consequences.

[mothman]

Still at least they're together.

[Buelligan]

Would it be wrong to pray that they all get wiped out in a freak shaving accident, leaving only Andrew and Camilla to continue (keep the people that love all this shit happy).

[Jollity]

I hope the queen can hang on until after Eurovision. I don't want us to have to withdraw out of respect and then have James Newman be our entry for 2022 as well out of respect to him. No disrespect to James Newman, honest - but I reckon we'll be missing a trick if we don't send a sea shanty next year. "Wellerman" is number one in Germany, Austria, Belgium (edit: not Belgium any more, it's number two now) and I think Swizerland. There's clearly an audience for it.

Oh, and maybe the queen could have her ninety-fifth birthday before she goes. I'm sure she'd like that.

[mothman]

If an entrant were to die suddenly before the contest, could they and their song be replaced with a banging sea shanty? Asking for a friend. I mean I'm legally obliged to stress that I don't want James Newman to die, obviously.

[Dr Rock]

Will people dislike Charlie and just bin the whole thing.

Almost certainly. He'll be sticking his nebby nose into things that are none of his business, and they won't be able to hide Camilla away as much. Abolition within five years.

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Would it be wrong to pray that they all get wiped out in a freak shaving accident, leaving only Andrew and Camilla to continue (keep the people that love all this shit happy).

they don't have beards do they?  why would they survive this incident?

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oh it's a freak one; of course.



explains it

[Jollity]

If an entrant were to die suddenly before the contest, could they and their song be replaced with a banging sea shanty? Asking for a friend. I mean I'm legally obliged to stress that I don't want James Newman to die, obviously.

There was one year where the Icelandic entrant died just before the contest, and he was replaced by some of his musician friends doing the same song, so they'd probably do that. Not as interesting. Though I don't mind the song especially, but I just had a thought about James Newman being chosen for Eurovision every year and never being able to go because something terrible keeps happening. "James Newman doing Eurovision" as a harbinger of doom.

I don't expect the queen gives a shit about any of this, but I find it more interesting than the royal family, so fuck it.

[Chedney Honks]

Long live the King

[pigamus]

Don't wish to be a source of concern in your life, dear RFV, but what you've just posted here carries a death sentence.  Have a lovely day, it may well be your last[nb]I won't might make a thread laughing about your demise, I promise you that.  Something good has to come out of all this negativity.  If you are married to a woodlouse, tell it to get its hair done, there may well be photographs.[/nb].  Leave the house now.

It's only illegal if you lick her and put her upside down on an envelope

[mothman]

There was one year where the Icelandic entrant died just before the contest, and he was replaced by some of his musician friends doing the same song, so they'd probably do that. Not as interesting. Though I don't mind the song especially, but I just had a thought about James Newman being chosen for Eurovision every year and never being able to go because something terrible keeps happening. "James Newman doing Eurovision" as a harbinger of doom.

It could be worse, we could be stuck forever with Suri or Siri or whatever her name was[nb]Short-haired blonde lass.[/nb]. Song so boring, I forgot how it went while I was still listening to it. It would be like The Silence, we'd forget we had an entrant and keep nominating new singers only to be told, "No, sorry[nb]Only it'd be in French, probably? "Non, je suis desolee"[nb]iOS really wants to correct this to "he suits Desiree"[/nb] or some shit like that.[/nb] - you already one... remember...?"

OK so how about, we force bribe ask the songwriter to say he's so heartbroken by James's death[nb]Again, legally required, not want dead.[/nb], they simply can't bear to think of anyone else singing that song so could we do a different one please?