have you ever gone "hang on. I'm a cunt"

[madhair60]

not in a sort of singular incident way, but in a way where you've realised that you've been exhibiting behaviour that might actually be borne of prejudice you didn't even realise you had? I'm not doing the vague shit, I realised today that I think I am actually prejudiced against a certain group of people (not a race...) and it's actually the reason I thought I wasn't (lived experience of them) that means I was... I know, makes no sense. But basically I'd been around someone so long that I'd taken their experience as the baseline experience and been sort of snippy and intolerant of others who didn't reflect that, or didn't live up to that, which I now realise (i know, pull your finger out madhair) was and is completely unfair and horrible.

So I suppose what I'm wondering is whether you've ever taken stock of relatively long-term behaviour of your own and gone "hang on. I'm a cunt", and changed your ways.

[bgmnts]

Yeah that happens regularly I'd say for me.

[Buelligan]

Yep.

I'm like this because of all that honing.

[Paul Calf]

Yeah. Frequently.

Significantly, when I realised that I'd lived in London too long and become part of the problem but it happens at least once a year.

[Dr Trouser]

So I suppose what I'm wondering is whether you've ever taken stock of relatively long-term behaviour of your own and gone "hang on. I'm a cunt",

Oh yes, and quite regularly

and changed your ways.

err no

[Jerzy Bondov]

Is this aimed at me?

[Buelligan]

No, someone else here.  You know who you are. 

Or

Oh, why's that then?

Probably go with the second one, safer.

[ImmaculateClump]

Oh, yes. I'm a constant work in progress.
Isn't that normal though? Wouldn't you have to have some sort of personality disorder to think you were peak human?

[Johnny Yesno]

Well, someone else would have been along sooner or later to help that mountaineer, probably.

[DrGreggles]

Nah, I'm lovely.

[frajer]

Definitely caught myself thinking things while in high dudgeon that my rational mind snags on and goes "hang on, that's not right or fair at all you silly cunt."

But I think the truly cuntish seldom if ever pull themselves up on it. Guess that's why they're cunts.

[paruses]

Yes. But have got better over the last year. Bear in mind I am self-certifying that.

[Chedney Honks]

No, because God made me this way so I have an excuse for the rest of my life.

[Icehaven]

Sort of. That old Elmore Leonard quote "If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you're the asshole" occasionally applies to me. I just convince myself sometimes that every stranger, without exception, is a horrible self-centered prick that hates me on sight so I shouldn't feel bad about not considering their feelings or inconveniencing them, which is obviously totally hypocritical and if followed through would result in me having the same shitty attitude I'm imagining everyone else has. In my defence it's usually prompted by one person actually being an asshole, but I need to not let that turn into everyone being one by default until proven otherwise.

A perfect example of this is how often, when I see someone running for a bus, I truly hope they don't catch it. Why? Why don't I want them to catch it? If they fell over and split their head open I'd be horrified and rush to help them immediately so I'm not just a nasty git who revels in misfortune, but I really don't want them to catch the bus. Maybe because I've run for and missed so many buses it's just comforting to see it happening to someone else rather than me, but it's still not very nice is it. 

[Jerzy Bondov]

Yeah I could strive every day to be a better man, to acknowledge my weaknesses and confront my darker impulses, but I can't be bothered and it's boring so I'm just going to keep sitting around on my fat arse making insensitive comments and playing shit video games until I die and so what

[Endicott]

Of course. I probably still am, in some new way I haven't noticed yet. The trick is to spot it, fix it, and get on with life without feeling too bad about it. Sometimes easier said than done.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

That old Elmore Leonard quote "If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you're the asshole

That seems appropriate, sometimes it feels like that, I've usually checked myself as a result.

It sometimes comes down to having an overly developed sense of courtesy and etiquette. I can't even watch one car tailgating without thinking 'cunt, hope he gets brake tested'. People who push in queues, littering, letting erratic dogs run wild and scare people, stopping at the bottom of an escalators, failing to make space for people getting off trains, etc. I suppose some days when you're pent up about other, bigger things you go looking for these people as excuses to let off steam. You can see why some people are given to road rage. Line them up: grave, grave, hell, prison, ground, sea grave, and so on.

As a lot of these pieces of etiquette are quite easy if you are considerate it's tempting to fall into the trap of thinking 'I am the one who is trying to help society function and yet I am surrounded by these feckless worms'. That's basically when you become the cunt.

I have been quite shy and guarded around people when meeting for the first time and that has been mistaken for people thinking 'aloof cunt that thinks he's above us', whereas it really isn't, I have just developed neuroses about people talking about me behind my back due to some school bullying and a damaging phase of friendship at work, and observed that I can be quite annoying in person when not reined in. My instincts are 'god, don't say anything to give someone a reason to dislike me' which has become 'don't say anything' or 'be guarded and closed off' and they end up not liking me anyway. Fuck sake. I do tend to get on more immediately well with hyper social people because they break that down quicker.

[Barry Admin]

Yes. But actually this kind of constant dwelling is what fucks me up. Most people are just like, "oh, might've been a cunt there... Anyway, on to the next thing."

[Bazooka]

Yes but I stopped drinking and am now a Puritan.

[pancreas]

I constantly call myself a cunt out loud. Too far gone to do anything about it, but it's good to be honest at least.

[Buelligan]

And there was the thing with the dying man's organ, pancs.  I'll say no more.

[touchingcloth]

Very regularly. I have said before that BlackLivesMatter challenged and continues to challenge my ideas that as a liberal and mixed race person I can't possibly be a racist. In a similar way I'm often horrified and depressed when I realise some internalised misogyny in myself. I know the cause of all that is really down to society, man, rather than me deliberately being a cunt, but I think it's useful to realise these things when if you don't recognise and deal with them as from the outside they can make you indistinguishable from actual proper cunts.

[Mr Banlon]

Sam & Dave decide to spice up their old back catalogue

[crankshaft]

Yes. But actually this kind of constant dwelling is what fucks me up. Most people are just like, "oh, might've been a cunt there... Anyway, on to the next thing."

Me too. Lockdown has suited me in one sense because I have been able to isolate myself and not interact with anyone, but it hasn't stopped my brain playing the greatest hits of every minor embarrassment I've ever suffered, all day, every day. I can't seem to break free.

I've been a cunt many times. Haven't we all? I'm not proud. Sometimes it's just because I'm in a bad mood. Sometimes it's because my lack of social skills short-circuits and I react in completely the wrong way without meaning to. But you can't exactly explain that to people, either before or after.

[Kankurette]

On a regular basis.

[chveik]

i can't relate at all, sorry

[Jerzy Bondov]

I could put loads of work into self-improvement and still be a cunt, or get even worse somehow, or I could just carry on like this

[Twit 2]

I constantly call myself a cunt out loud. Too far gone to do anything about it, but it's good to be honest at least.

I am always happy to call you a cunt, ease the load.

My preferred insult to myself is "You fucking dickhead," sometimes blurted out randomly when I'm driving along or doing the washing up.

[Barry Admin]

Me too. Lockdown has suited me in one sense because I have been able to isolate myself and not interact with anyone, but it hasn't stopped my brain playing the greatest hits of every minor embarrassment I've ever suffered, all day, every day. I can't seem to break free.

I've been a cunt many times. Haven't we all? I'm not proud. Sometimes it's just because I'm in a bad mood. Sometimes it's because my lack of social skills short-circuits and I react in completely the wrong way without meaning to. But you can't exactly explain that to people, either before or after.

Torture, isn't it?

Just remembered that someone said to me yesterday: "the problem with you is that you're a really nice guy most of the time, so when you have a bad day, or have to be more forceful or whatever, everyone takes it personally. If you were an unabashed sociopathic cunt then everyone would just find it funny and deal with it." And then he drew a comparison to a nutjob who takes pride in his total lack of empathy and arsehole status, and sure enough, everyone does eat that shit up.

Suspect he's onto something, considering another thread on here this week, tbh.

[The Mollusk]

I'm going to say "absolutely not even for a second" feeling confident that no one has made that joke yet in this thread.