Author Topic: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence  (Read 383 times)

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Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« on: April 27, 2021, 01:11:18 PM »
Hi I’m looking to eat the oldest tree that is still in existence.  Individual tree, please, not an ancient organism that comprises many newer trees at the surface of this earth.  I am only interested in having the oldest tree right there in front of me then getting it all inside my mouth and tummy, yum!


Who’s gonna help me research this.  Gonna be a blast!!

Lemming

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #1 on: April 27, 2021, 02:33:00 PM »
The Great Basin Bristlecone Pine can live to over 5000 years old, apparently, making it your best bet.

Looks like shit, though. It's going to taste like dogshit, and not in a good way.

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #2 on: April 27, 2021, 04:33:32 PM »
By your logic, if I am eating a month-old baby I am eating someone aged 105 years, because humans “can” live up to that age.



Sourcing for me the oldest tree in existence would be grand

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #3 on: April 27, 2021, 05:52:52 PM »
Can I have some?

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #4 on: April 27, 2021, 06:03:21 PM »
Can I have some?

My ambition is to eat an entire one of it.  I believe that if I share any I won’t be getting the full benefit.

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #5 on: April 27, 2021, 06:09:56 PM »





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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #6 on: April 27, 2021, 06:35:14 PM »


If it's not a tree then why is it assuming this has anything to do with it.

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #7 on: April 27, 2021, 06:35:37 PM »
If it's not a tree then why is it assuming this has anything to do with it.

Mind y'business!

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #8 on: April 29, 2021, 10:06:43 PM »
Mind y'business!

Excuse me... I am looking to eat the oldest tree in existence.  I don't know what those things have to do with it if they're not trees.  They're getting defensive about something that doesn't concern them.  If they're not trees then I wasn't addressing them, was I.  Their reaction just makes them seem guilty, if anything.

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #9 on: May 01, 2021, 05:06:06 PM »
Excuse me... I am looking to eat the oldest tree in existence.  I don't know what those things have to do with it if they're not trees.  They're getting defensive about something that doesn't concern them.  If they're not trees then I wasn't addressing them, was I.  Their reaction just makes them seem guilty, if anything.

You're in luck, Replies! Just found and ancient oak in Staffordshire that dates back 1,000 years! Enjoy!

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2021, 08:21:14 PM »
Is it the oldest tree in existence?

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2021, 08:31:04 PM »
Is it the oldest tree in existence?

Oldest tree I could find, mate. Oldest tree I could find.

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #12 on: May 01, 2021, 08:32:01 PM »
Oldest tree I could find, mate. Oldest tree I could find.

Hi so I am looking to eat the oldest tree in existence if anyone can help me at all

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #13 on: May 01, 2021, 08:39:44 PM »
Hi so I am looking to eat the oldest tree in existence if anyone can help me at all

Yeah just as well mate turns out it was just another 'human' tree!


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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #14 on: May 01, 2021, 09:03:57 PM »
Bollocks to you with your wilful time wasting.  I have one simple ambition with this thread and you keep scuffing dust onto it.

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #15 on: May 01, 2021, 09:26:56 PM »
Bollocks to you with your wilful time wasting.  I have one simple ambition with this thread and you keep scuffing dust onto it.

Listen sunshine I'm not the one looking to eat the oldest tree in existence. That's a pretty lofty ambition, you're just gonna have to take the knocks and bumps as you go.

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #16 on: May 01, 2021, 09:34:34 PM »
I don't like your answers.  Next person please.

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #17 on: May 01, 2021, 11:20:39 PM »
This any one else have an answer for this jerk?

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #18 on: May 02, 2021, 11:58:33 AM »
I said no thank you to further interruptions from you

Glebe

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Re: Looking to eat the oldest tree in existence
« Reply #19 on: May 02, 2021, 12:04:06 PM »
Enjoy your freaking Oldest Tree in Existence... all crumbly.

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