Author Topic: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?  (Read 16576 times)

Brundle-Fly

  • "Why don't you do something to help me?"
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #300 on: May 03, 2021, 06:28:26 PM »
Billy Connolly used to talk on stage about doing The Last Chicken In Sainsburys when he was young, at least he seemed to be embarrassed about it though.

He wasn't embarrassed about streaking across Piccadilly Circus on live telly in 2001 for Comic Relief.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #301 on: May 03, 2021, 06:58:00 PM »
Classic CaB action.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #302 on: May 03, 2021, 07:22:03 PM »
She - "The Marchioness of Cholmondeley," no less - is much more equine-like than our Kate, and it's well know that Royal males do not have flings* with horse-like women.

That's a Harry Enfield character shurely

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #303 on: May 03, 2021, 07:24:39 PM »
Our Cartoon Royal Family.

Gurke and Hare

  • Fold water. Roll into small cubes.
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #304 on: May 04, 2021, 11:30:25 AM »
He wasn't embarrassed about streaking across Piccadilly Circus on live telly in 2001 for Comic Relief.

Is there a qualitative difference between streaking - or indeed being totally nude generally - with just getting one's knob out? Streaking isn't usually seen as sexually aggressive, is it?

Butchers Blind

  • Adios pantaloons!
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #305 on: May 04, 2021, 11:32:49 AM »
Is there a qualitative difference between streaking - or indeed being totally nude generally - with just getting one's knob out? Streaking isn't usually seen as sexually aggressive, is it?

Depends, if the ol' fella is ready for action then it might be.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #306 on: May 04, 2021, 02:04:52 PM »
Is there a qualitative difference between streaking - or indeed being totally nude generally - with just getting one's knob out? Streaking isn't usually seen as sexually aggressive, is it?

Fully nude isn't rude
Limp cock out, knockabout
Hard rod showing, prison going
Cock and socks, in the stocks

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #307 on: May 04, 2021, 02:51:53 PM »
Can I just say having lived for 5 years in the UK's PREMIER stag and hen do resort and longtime holder of Booze Britain's award for best Blind-d-date S4Cs theme park (Bournemouth) getting flashed by women off their moffs on 20 strawpeedos was quite a common occurrence.  Only boobs mind, which makes me wonder about the logistics and impact of flashing your muff compared to dangling your apparatus out your flies in low pressure sodium lighting.

I once had "The Stag & Hen" bus, a needlessly double decker bus regularly crammed with hand-reared wankers from the South coast Laandan[1] pull over to me on a Saturday night; open the doors and have three women screech in unison "Get your cock out!" (reader I didn't; sodium orange is not a flattering shade for me).  A drive by grotting if you will.  Bournemouth is basically set up to operate like this; a lot of bars provide the sexually aggressive (and loud) atmosphere  to get people lively and stimulated so they can sell more booze; you'll hear very little complaints from the men and women there (they are all smashed) and there is a really toxic mix between the stag and hen crowds with those that are not "eventing"; and a snowballing of "having it large bey!" occurring (btw you'll rarely meet anyone actually from Bournemouth on a night out they know to keep well away) and every night on season becoming party night (pew-pew-peeeeew party horn noise!).

I've seen some staggering stuff on those streets (I mean years ago, I don't know what the craic is now but at one stage it proudly twinned itself with Laganas ffs) I wouldn't recommend it.
 1. corrected for accuracy
« Last Edit: May 04, 2021, 05:04:26 PM by TrenterPercenter »

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #308 on: May 04, 2021, 03:05:24 PM »
As a Bournemouth/Poole resident for 40 years, I concur. The last place I want to be of a Friday night is Bournemouth town centre.

The council are already under fire for approving pop-up stalls selling booze on the prom this summer as an influx of tourists who can't get to Ibiza and Magaluf descend upon us. It's going to be utterly fucking wretched.

Ambient Sheep

  • RIP Marian Howard 1968-2021
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #309 on: May 04, 2021, 03:13:15 PM »
Can I just say having lived for 5 years in the UK's PREMIER stag and hen do resort [...] (Bournemouth)

Blackpool's on the phone, shurely?


Still, never knew all that about Bournemouth.  Awful shit.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #310 on: May 04, 2021, 03:13:56 PM »
Is there a qualitative difference between streaking - or indeed being totally nude generally - with just getting one's knob out? Streaking isn't usually seen as sexually aggressive, is it?

If he had his cock out; yes.
If he had his willy out; no.

Butchers Blind

  • Adios pantaloons!
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #311 on: May 04, 2021, 03:14:43 PM »
I once went to Bournemouth on a stag do but my cock stayed firmly in my trousers. Apart from when I needed to piss and this was in the designated areas. Thank you.

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #312 on: May 04, 2021, 04:11:13 PM »
Still, never knew all that about Bournemouth.  Awful shit.

Bournemouth and that area is naturally beautiful and people actually local to Bournemouth are by and large really nice; it's just Friday/Saturday nights in the town centre - don't let this put you of going there; you can find nice spots up and down from the main pier on the beach which keeps you well out the way of the tourists.

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #313 on: May 04, 2021, 04:12:39 PM »
As a Bournemouth/Poole resident for 40 years, I concur. The last place I want to be of a Friday night is Bournemouth town centre.

hehe I used to work at Liverpool Victoria and I'll always remember the Christmas Party booking team getting the long list out of places they'd been told to never come back too.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #314 on: May 04, 2021, 04:36:03 PM »
The title had me thinking the thread was about football scribe Nigel Clarke. Glad to be corrected.

Better Midlands

  • I'm not internationally known
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #315 on: May 04, 2021, 04:51:55 PM »
people actually local to Bournemouth are by and large really nice

Cheers

You can find nice spots up and down from the main pier on the beach which keeps you well out the way of the tourists.

There's spots between Southbourne and Hengistbury Head that are almost deserted, even at the height of summer or head to Sandbanks and walk back towards Bournemouth for five minutes and it's pretty empty.

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #316 on: May 04, 2021, 05:02:14 PM »
There's spots between Southbourne and Hengistbury Head that are almost deserted, even at the height of summer or head to Sandbanks and walk back towards Bournemouth for five minutes and it's pretty empty.

I know exactly where you mean! My usual spot was straight down the from the zig zag at East Cliff (it's me, I'm Cathy!) as I used to live on Northcote Road so it was very convenient and I was usually to lazy to walk up there.  It's a beautiful place; I miss it loads but my partner is originally from there so I'm still back there quite often.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #317 on: May 04, 2021, 05:25:38 PM »
Yeah, there's relatively quiet bits due to the lack of easily available food and drink, something the aforementioned vendors are hoping to address.

Personally, I like to visit the beaches out of town. Milford on Sea and Lymington are good to the east, Bridport, Ringstead, Osmington, Kimmeridge and Chesil beach to the west. Pebble beaches and no serious tourist attractions beyond the occasional fish and chip place or pub. Keeps the shitheads out. Lovely.

Endicott

  • I've done no research
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #318 on: May 04, 2021, 05:45:35 PM »
Still, never knew all that about Bournemouth.  Awful shit.

I was there once about 12 years ago. Wall to wall puking in the street[1].

Brighton, near the pier where the big clubs are, is similar, maybe not quite so bad. My mate lived in Hove so we would always be heading out of Brighton on a pub crawl back to Hove after about 7pm.
 1. until I came home hahahaha

Echo Valley 2-6809

  • Part of no circle
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #319 on: May 04, 2021, 05:56:25 PM »
Fully nude isn't rude
Limp cock out, knockabout
Hard rod showing, prison going
Cock and socks, in the stocks

I remember that from Brian Cant's last Play Away.

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #320 on: May 04, 2021, 06:07:36 PM »
I was there once about 12 years ago. Wall to wall puking in the street[1].
 1. until I came home hahahaha

Turning into a bit of Bournemouth chat but those from there or interested in this should watch the horror film "K-Shop"; it's actually a pretty decent film and a modern spin on Sweeney Todd.....with kebabs and racism.   However more than that it is set in something-on sea (Bournemouth) and is a social commentary on the place; the villain is a pwopa lad who is buying and converting all of the towns heritage building into degenerate mega clubs (it's got the Old Fire Station in it as the main club - oh how art mimics life) anyway check it out it's good in lots of ways and you'll be able to work out which chippy it is all filmed in.

https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/k_shop

Famous Mortimer

  • War - it's fantastic!
    • International Syndicate of Cult Film Critics
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #321 on: May 04, 2021, 06:36:32 PM »
Turning into a bit of Bournemouth chat
Yes, by you. Congrats on diverting another thread.

Mr Banlon

  • If you're gonna go nog, you gotta go Mingus
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #322 on: May 04, 2021, 07:00:19 PM »
Three tenpin bowling alleys in Bournemouth and seven lawn bowls clubs. Bowly Bournemouth bastards with their underhand ways.

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #323 on: May 04, 2021, 07:50:01 PM »

Brundle-Fly

  • "Why don't you do something to help me?"
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #324 on: May 04, 2021, 11:18:35 PM »
Turning into a bit of Bournemouth chat but those from there or interested in this should watch the horror film "K-Shop"; it's actually a pretty decent film and a modern spin on Sweeney Todd.....with kebabs and racism.   However more than that it is set in something-on sea (Bournemouth) and is a social commentary on the place; the villain is a pwopa lad who is buying and converting all of the towns heritage building into degenerate mega clubs (it's got the Old Fire Station in it as the main club - oh how art mimics life) anyway check it out it's good in lots of ways and you'll be able to work out which chippy it is all filmed in.

https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/k_shop

I enjoyed watching that tonight. Thanks TP.

TrenterPercenter

  • Rock the CABLADs
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #325 on: May 05, 2021, 12:43:13 PM »
I enjoyed watching that tonight. Thanks TP.

Your welcome and glad you enjoyed it :) it's good isn't it (poss worth the slight diversion of the thread).

Brundle-Fly

  • "Why don't you do something to help me?"
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #326 on: May 05, 2021, 01:23:40 PM »
Your welcome and glad you enjoyed it :) it's good isn't it (poss worth the slight diversion of the thread).

Yes, very well directed and acted, unpretentious, dark comedy. Reminded me of the film Piggy (2012) Interesting to see Euan Mackintosh getting star billing on IMDb when he's only in it for three minutes.

R.I.P. Horror films thread in Deeper In Movies etc

Anyway, Noel Clarke. Like I said in the old Bill Cosby thread. It's heartbreaking when you get an inspiring high-profile black role model like this to let down that community so spectacularly, particularly as Clarke achieved so much at a young age.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #327 on: May 05, 2021, 01:46:11 PM »
I’ve never been to Bournemouth but I’ve had random men shout at me to get my tits out, or hit on me for a joke, if that happens.

DoesNotFollow

  • Everybody in the whole of NASA was in the pork pie
Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #328 on: May 05, 2021, 02:17:38 PM »
Loving all the Bomo(and Poole) CaB crew chat, makes me feel all fuzzy.

That's all.

Re: I hear you're a pest now, Noel Clarke?
« Reply #329 on: May 05, 2021, 10:53:09 PM »
There's one Bournemouth every minute.

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