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Things that are NEVER funny.

Started by Jockice, May 13, 2021, 03:01:36 PM

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Jockice

The Secret Diary Of...famous person. Or even worse of famous person's spouse. Yes, I'm looking at you Catherine Bennett from The Observer.

'Adult' versions of fairy tales etc. Usually with sexual references and swearing. As my mum once said when there was an item about one on telly: "Why would anyone want to do something like that?" I'm with her all the way on this.

Woody Allen.

Adults talking in baby voices/babies talking in adult voices. (With a special place in hell for attractive women who think that talking in a baby voice is not only funny, but somehow sexy. It's not. At all.)

madhair60


Video Game Fan 2000

Familiar thing but the genders are swapped.
Weed as a punchline.

Kankurette

I like adult/darker versions when they're done more seriously, like Angela Carter's takes, but the 'lol millennial Goldilocks who builds a workers' cooperative with the bears' or whatever is really overdone. I got given a book of millennial fairy tales and they just weren't funny.

Also, racist jokes. Low-hanging fruit but I just don't get them. Or kitchen jokes, which female footballers, pundits and football fans get a lot. Nobody tells Robbie Savage to get back in his garden shed when he says stupid shit about football. Nobody says Hugo Lloris should be wearing washing up gloves instead of goalkeeping gloves. It's not even a punchline. 'Hurr hurr woman do housework, me funny.' Shut up.

Cold Meat Platter

Soyboy leftist cucks trying to meme


Jockice

Quote from: madhair60 on May 13, 2021, 03:02:50 PM
Often funny. Both ha-ha and oo-er.

I disagree. Like Neil Hannon in music, I have friends who'll swear that he is a genius, but I'm not having it. He just gave me the creeps before it was even confirmed that he was an actual real-life creep. I may have thought Jimmy Savile was okay as a youngster but I always knew Allen was a wrong-un.

French And Saunders, whether solo or as a double act, have never made me laugh either.

Dusty Substance


Old people swearing.

Children swearing.

Noel Fielding.

Kankurette

I wouldn't say stand-up comedy is never funny - I loved Eddie Izzard back in the '90s and saw a few of her videos - but I rarely find it funny. A lot of the time I'm just sitting there feeling awkward. I don't know why I can't get into stand-up, I've just never been that into it.

I never found The Mighty Boosh funny either, except that song about eels.


JamesTC

It can be very easy to click on this and just think it is a new page of the things that are always funny thread.


Gurke and Hare

Quote from: Jockice on May 13, 2021, 03:01:36 PM
The Secret Diary Of...famous person. Or even worse of famous person's spouse. Yes, I'm looking at you Catherine Bennett from The Observer.

Also Craig Brown in Private Eye.

Any other stuff Craig Brown does.

the science eel

that bit on Mock The Week where they have to 'take the floor'

Mr Trumpet

Prank phone calls taking the piss out of people trying to do their low-paid jobs


DrGreggles

Quote from: the science eel on May 13, 2021, 03:38:08 PM
that bit on Mock The Week where they have to 'take the floor'

Or just Mock The Week generally.

chveik


Greg Torso

Writing 'Parklife' after someone's done a long post.

the science eel



Catalogue Trousers

Paul Joseph Watson's attempts at humour.

popcorn

wikipedia vandalism. lol it says the wrong thing now!

lankyguy95

Quote from: somone on May 13, 2021, 04:22:50 PM
Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post. Writing 'Parklife' after somone's done a long post.
'Parklife'

JesusAndYourBush

Quote from: C_Larence on May 13, 2021, 03:41:20 PM
Improv

Especially if you decide to do a 'hoe down'.  Never funny.

Greg Torso

#25
*

peteprodge

"...I think a little bit of wee came out! LOL"

Greg Torso

#27
'

Gulftastic

Jokes where the punchline is someone famous who received opinion has dubbed as ugly. Peter Bearsdley was often the go to in my day. Not sure who they'd use now.

Jockice

#29
Quote from: Kankurette on May 13, 2021, 03:05:29 PM

Also, racist jokes. Low-hanging fruit but I just don't get them.

Can I include doing shit impressions of people's accents while mentioning regional/national stereotypes and phrases you have rarely or never heard in the region or nation you come from. It never ceases to amaze me how many English folk think it's hilarious to talk in shit Scottish/faux Jock, saying 'och aye the noo' while mentioning kilts and bagpipes and expect me to find it amusing too. It wasn't funny the first time someone did it, let alone the millionth.

Oh, hold on. It's my thread. I can include anything I want.