Author Topic: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.  (Read 8876 times)

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #60 on: June 04, 2021, 09:04:06 PM »
Jimbo's real name is Corky.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #61 on: June 04, 2021, 09:04:53 PM »
Homer, there's a man here who thinks he can help you.
Batman?
No, he's a scientist.
Batman's a scientist.



I'm tired of being a wannabe league bowler. I wannabe a league bowler.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #62 on: June 04, 2021, 09:06:53 PM »
Maybe if you didn't poop so much you wouldn't be so small oh!

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #63 on: June 04, 2021, 09:07:18 PM »
(three children are shouting and irritating their father while he is driving the family car)
Children's Angry Dad: If YOU kids CAN'T keep your hands to yourself, I'm gonna TURN THIS CAR AROUND, AND THERE WILL BE NO CAPE CANAVERAL FOR ANYBODY!!!
(kids go quiet; Nelson slaps the man's head from Bart's car without the father observing it)
Children's Dad: THAT'S IT! BACK TO WINNIPEG!
(he turns the car around)

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #64 on: June 04, 2021, 09:07:31 PM »

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #65 on: June 04, 2021, 09:09:47 PM »
It's literally the eleventh hour, 10 PM

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #66 on: June 04, 2021, 09:11:02 PM »
Lousy Smarch weather.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #67 on: June 04, 2021, 09:14:41 PM »
senor plow no es macho, solamente un borracho

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #68 on: June 04, 2021, 09:16:12 PM »
And now, to top off our most propane-explosion-free science week ever, our grand finale

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #69 on: June 04, 2021, 09:17:08 PM »

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #70 on: June 04, 2021, 09:30:35 PM »
Aw, my favourite Arnie Pye moments are from season 12 onwards.

"I can't see through metal, Kent!"

and

"You wanna know what I see, Kent? I see a slow news day with nothing to fill it!"
"Arnie, you're supposed to be filming people coping with the loss of their church."
"And how am I supposed to do that? Do I have a magic lens that can see into people's souls? Well yours would be black, Kent, black as the ace of spades!"

idunnosomename

  • PIZZA BEAN
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #71 on: June 04, 2021, 09:31:43 PM »
This is an ARM. Drawn by NOBODY. It is worth NOTHING.

Blumf

  • Not long now
    • IGNORE ME!!!
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #72 on: June 04, 2021, 09:41:46 PM »

Blumf

  • Not long now
    • IGNORE ME!!!
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #73 on: June 04, 2021, 09:43:42 PM »

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #74 on: June 04, 2021, 09:44:21 PM »


He has all but two lines, but he might be my fave one shot character. As with a lot of these, the perfect delivery, (by Hank Aziria?), nails it.

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #76 on: June 04, 2021, 10:02:47 PM »


Still the name I use on any video game.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #77 on: June 04, 2021, 10:07:18 PM »


He has all but two lines, but he might be my fave one shot character. As with a lot of these, the perfect delivery, (by Hank Aziria?), nails it.
As someone whose dad plays keyboards, I have to agree.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #78 on: June 04, 2021, 10:10:13 PM »
Mr. Simpson a cat is a living thing
I don't care
Now to get me some sweet
No Mr. Simpson that's sexual harassment if you keep it up I'll scream so loud the whole country will hear.
Like the Man in the Whitehouse not likely hahahahahaha

dead-ced-dead

  • My legs hurt
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #79 on: June 04, 2021, 10:23:20 PM »

The Mollusk

  • guaranteed tremendous
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #80 on: June 04, 2021, 10:23:41 PM »
Krusty's private plane is called the I'm-On-Rolla Gay.

I used to fly to Vegas in it with Dean Martin! One night he looked out the window, and the moon hit his eye like a big pizza pie... We wrote a song about it! But I ended up infringing on one he’d written years before.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #81 on: June 04, 2021, 10:25:01 PM »
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeelo
Has the whole world gone gay?
Your all sick
Oh be nice

The Mollusk

  • guaranteed tremendous
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #82 on: June 04, 2021, 10:25:07 PM »
Moe: Come on, you gotta give me back my floor! My customers are walkin’ around on the pipes!

Repo guy: Hey, next time pay your bills.

Moe: But I don’t want to!

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #83 on: June 04, 2021, 10:27:14 PM »
"But Blanche, you gotta help me, I'm sixty-four grand in the hole!"

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #84 on: June 04, 2021, 10:31:38 PM »


"Where'd you get those cloaks?"

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #85 on: June 04, 2021, 10:36:17 PM »
This isn't a joke exactly, but the bit in "Homer vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandment" where the dodgy cable guy waltzes into the house with a stolen car radio, explains "Your door wasn't locked in any serious way", and murmurs "even better" after Homer lets slip that Ned isn't home gives me PIF vibes.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #86 on: June 04, 2021, 10:37:02 PM »

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #87 on: June 04, 2021, 10:43:29 PM »
'Hi, everyone. If I could just say a few words, I'd be a better public speaker'

Not sure why this, among all of those to choose from always stands out but it makes me laugh every time. I love the fact Bart laughs when no one else does. It's a nice moment.

'Curse you magic beans!'

'You know Lisa...music helps Daddy think'

Also Homer crying at the backwards flushing toilet in Bart Vs Australia is another throwaway moment that always gets me but I see that episode is now officially 'problematic' so I should probably remember not to laugh next time.

Jerzy Bondov

  • best not bother
    • righto so ive got five minutes off work and uh yeah im gonna have a cheeky volvic
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #88 on: June 04, 2021, 10:45:58 PM »
You’d better run, egg!

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #89 on: June 04, 2021, 10:49:14 PM »
You can't even laugh at a person saluting a backwards flushing toilet without being arrested and thrown in jail.




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