Author Topic: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.  (Read 10991 times)

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #30 on: June 04, 2021, 06:50:21 PM »
Not so much a joke but another bit of restraint is the little glimpses we get of Leopold.

Gurke and Hare

  • Fold water. Roll into small cubes.
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #31 on: June 04, 2021, 06:50:46 PM »

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #32 on: June 04, 2021, 06:54:16 PM »
Love the bit in "Dead Bart" when they're trying to get on the airplane.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #33 on: June 04, 2021, 07:01:03 PM »
Love the bit in "Dead Bart" when they're trying to get on the airplane.


Schrodingers Cat

  • Hail majestic corporate light!
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #34 on: June 04, 2021, 07:02:24 PM »
Quote from: Cayman Islands accountant
Oh I’m sorry, I can’t divulge information about that customers secret, illegal account.

Oh crap! I shouldn’t have said they were a customer.

Oh crap! I shouldn’t have said it was a secret.

Oh crap! I certainly shouldn’t have said it was illegal.

Aah, it’s too hot today

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #35 on: June 04, 2021, 07:05:25 PM »

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #36 on: June 04, 2021, 07:05:58 PM »


I suspect I'm not alone in being unable to watch that gif without adding Homer's girlish giggle.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #37 on: June 04, 2021, 07:13:43 PM »
"Sorry about the running you over prank"

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #38 on: June 04, 2021, 07:20:09 PM »
"Mr Simpson, don't you worry. I watched Matlock in a bar last night. The sound wasn't on, but I think I got the gist of it".

Anything Lionel Hutz says.

Anything Phil Hartman says, really.

Jerzy Bondov

  • best not bother
    • righto so ive got five minutes off work and uh yeah im gonna have a cheeky volvic
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #39 on: June 04, 2021, 07:25:58 PM »

If pushed I would say that’s my favourite bit of comedy ever.

“See you in the car!
Best wishes
Milhouse”

dead-ced-dead

  • My legs hurt
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #40 on: June 04, 2021, 07:29:02 PM »
"Mr Simpson, don't you worry. I watched Matlock in a bar last night. The sound wasn't on, but I think I got the gist of it".

Anything Lionel Hutz says.

Anything Phil Hartman says, really.

God, I miss him. He was perfect. In NewsRadio, too.

Jerzy Bondov

  • best not bother
    • righto so ive got five minutes off work and uh yeah im gonna have a cheeky volvic
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #41 on: June 04, 2021, 07:32:53 PM »
Every time we do this thread it’s all the same jokes and I love it and read every single one.

Alright you listen up you little FREAKS. The fun stops here. You’re gonna SHUT your stinkin TRAPS and behave DAMMIT! This is one substitute you’re not gonna SCREW WITH. Marge Simpson.

Wonderful Butternut

  • Summer Night City!
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #42 on: June 04, 2021, 07:33:02 PM »
"Gee... I don't know what you have planned for tonight Homer, but count me out. Didn't you buy any meat?"

- Marge opening Homer's "shopping", which was condoms, porn mags, enema kits, "panty shields" (sanitary towels?) and a bottle of whiskey that he bought to 'act casual' when buying illegal fireworks.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

  • Living proof of everything wrong with the world
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #43 on: June 04, 2021, 07:35:50 PM »
Dee dee diddle-ee dee diddle-ee-dee-de-dee

CLONG

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVJzt7y2gR0

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #44 on: June 04, 2021, 07:47:26 PM »


The Mollusk

  • ♫ The incredible edible ... rump roast! ♫
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #45 on: June 04, 2021, 08:14:26 PM »
It feels almost redundant to quote Steamed Hams, but it's amazing how the original scene, despite being memed into the void, has lost none of it's original power and brilliance.

The little noise Chalmers makes just as Skinners climbing out of the window. "AAH-hmmm"

Hahaha that Chalmers noise comes into my head all the time! I thought it would be way too small and insignificant to even mention in the “extremely small moments” thread, but I love it.

It’s not redundant to mentioned Steamed Hams by the way. It’s one of the greatest comedy scenes ever written.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #46 on: June 04, 2021, 08:42:52 PM »
Have the Rolling Stones killed
But sir those aren't -
DO AS I SAY

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #47 on: June 04, 2021, 08:46:16 PM »
It's just a goddamn popularity contest with you kids.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #48 on: June 04, 2021, 08:49:05 PM »
Krudler.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #49 on: June 04, 2021, 08:50:43 PM »
This is my favorite Simpsons exchange:

Quote
Bart: I’m sorry for all the trouble I’ve caused you, Krusty, but you know, my mom says God never closes a door without opening a window.

Krusty: No offense, kid, but your mom’s a dingbat! There’s no silver lining here. I was a big cheese. A huge cheese! And now look at me!
I got to ride the bus like a schnook.
I got to live in an apartment like an idiot!
I have to wait in line with a bunch of nobodies to buy groceries from a failure!

Bart: It doesn’t matter what you did wrong, though, as long as you’re on TV people will respect you.

Krusty: [spits] Bah. What good is respect without the moolah to back it up. Everywhere I go I see teachers driving Ferraris, research scientists drinking champagne. I tried to drink a Coke on the bus, and they took away my pass!

[breaks a bottle of scotch]

That’s no life for a famous clown.

It should be etched into a gold plate and launched in to space with a picture of Monica Vitti so the aliens know not to blow us up.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #50 on: June 04, 2021, 08:52:04 PM »
He took Bart to that wasn't part of our deal blackheart that wasn't part.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #51 on: June 04, 2021, 08:53:17 PM »
A friend of mine just does not like Krusty and thinks everything with him in is pure failure. Consistent on this point for 20 years. Weird.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #52 on: June 04, 2021, 08:55:21 PM »
What you talking about? You are the one who double dared us.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #53 on: June 04, 2021, 08:56:33 PM »
To be fair Krusty and Burns were the first characters to become complete shit.

But Krusty Gets Kancelled is my joint fav with Last Exit To Springfield and Bart the Fink the last perfect episode.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #54 on: June 04, 2021, 08:57:29 PM »

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #55 on: June 04, 2021, 08:58:49 PM »
"Please, please, kids. Stop fighting. Maybe Lisa's right about America being a land of opportunity, and maybe Adil has a point about the machinery of capitalism being oiled with the blood of the workers."

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #56 on: June 04, 2021, 08:59:21 PM »
For god's sake sir they are 2 seats I like to put my feet up.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #57 on: June 04, 2021, 09:00:48 PM »

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #58 on: June 04, 2021, 09:02:03 PM »
Bart the Fink has -

"Crap, I shouldn't have said it was a secret"
"That's no life for a famous clown"
"Arrr, he'll be dancing for hours"
"My beloved pornography!"
"People die all the time, just like that"
"Tax avoision"
"Garnish my celery?"
"Not me, though. I loved Krusty"
Newhart cameo
and
Krusty's Dean Martin anecdote.

Re: Best jokes in classic Simpsons.
« Reply #59 on: June 04, 2021, 09:03:44 PM »
Krusty's private plane is called the I'm-On-Rolla Gay.

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