Which one of you was this?

[DoesNotFollow]

Girlfriend's sister saw this on a walk. Come on, fess up.

[Butchers Blind]

That was Friday, is he still out there?

[flotemysost]

Is that his cock poking through the note?

[Video Game Fan 2000]

Naked wanking?

[Buelligan]

Imperial measurements, in this day and age?

[Bronzy]

Looks like someone has managed to escape from H.S. Art

[Video Game Fan 2000]

Imperial measurements, in this day and age?

I thought the author was just so enthralled by their autoerotic activities that they spontaneously drew a smiley face in the middle of the sentence.

[Hand Solo]

A purlieu is part of a forest isn't it? If only a poster on here had a particularly foresty sounding name that would give them away?

[Video Game Fan 2000]

As you can tell from my username I have repetitive strain injury and carpal tunnel syndrom and I haven't been able to wank without medical assistance since the turn of the century. As you can also tell from my username I am too poisoned by irony to feel genuine sexual arousal, I just visualize Zizek memes and send myself to horny jail.

[Video Game Fan 2000]

I'm going to point the finger at Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. It is clearly a second draft of "Leck mich im Arsch" in B Flat and is doubtlessly worth over three hundred and fifty thousand pounds to collectors of Insane Clown Posee memoriabilia.

[Hand Solo]

Silly goose should have used one of these:



Jam that up your arse and you're away.

[shiftwork2]

Is that a 6 or 8 inch shave cock?  We must know.

[DoesNotFollow]

I thought the author was just so enthralled by their autoerotic activities that they spontaneously drew a smiley face in the middle of the sentence.

This really cracked us up, cheers.

[Captain Z]

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Love tree chestburster.

More of that content

[flotemysost]

This reminds me, I used to pass a tree on my winter lockdown walking route with two round protrusions near the base which looked uncannily like a pair of pert, muscular human buttocks. Maybe one day someone will fasten a note around them soliciting al fresco bum jollies.

[steve98]

Is that a 6 or 8 inch shave cock?  We must know.

Clever of you to omit the inch symbol ('') this time, but really there's no need: no-one here's denouncing your depravity. No-one cares.

[Gurke and Hare]

Imperial measurements, in this day and age?

Along with selling beer in pints, cock size was one of the exemptions the UK got from the EU metrication regulations.

[Chairman Yang]

More worried about the lycra-clad arse holding the note aloft.

[Glebe]

It was me. Look I've been a bit desperate lately.

[Ferris]

Looks like someone has managed to escape from H.S. Art

Escaped? He's just been voted in as president!

[zomgmouse]

David Shrigley has let himself go

[Fambo Number Mive]

I thought it said suave cock.

Is the sucking and arse licking mutual? Or does the writer just want his cock sucked and arse licked?

[Butchers Blind]

I thought it said suave cock.

Is the sucking and arse licking mutual? Or does the writer just want his cock sucked and arse licked?

He's not made it plain and this could lead to confusion. Does he want to suck and have his arse licked or is after getiing sucked and arse licked?  He's gone to all the trouble in leaving a note but not made his intentions clear. Schoolboy error.

[Sebastian Cobb]

I reckon if he's taken to leaving notes on trees he'll take what he can get probably.

[Buelligan]

I love the penpersonship, not even lying.

[Dr Rock]

Naughty Groot

[dissolute ocelot]

I like how the Os in LOOKING look like screwed up eyes.

[Fambo Number Mive]

Does this person not have a phone or access to email? Would that not be easier (and more legal)  than walking around naked wanking his 6 inch suave cock hoping someone will respond to the note?

Also, what if another person is walking around naked wanking his cock but doesn't want sucking or arse licking?

[Butchers Blind]

Does this person not have a phone or access to email? Would that not be easier (and more legal)  than walking around naked wanking his 6 inch suave cock hoping someone will respond to the note?

Also, what if another person is walking around naked wanking his cock but doesn't want sucking or arse licking?

You're right, the woods should be segregated into sucking & arse licking or no sucking just arse licking.