Author Topic: Welcome Home, Colin!  (Read 2566 times)

Welcome Home, Colin!
« on: June 07, 2021, 06:40:34 PM »
I wonder what sort of do will be laid on for this ol' scamp when he gets back into civvies?

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leicestershire-57384393

Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #1 on: June 07, 2021, 06:53:18 PM »
Call me controversial, but I must say I don't think much of this fellow.

Probably my least favourite Colin. Baker, Caterpillar and Firth are all ahead of him.

bgmnts

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #2 on: June 07, 2021, 06:59:10 PM »
Quote
"Even though some 30 years have passed, this isn't the sort of crime one can ever forget," he said.

"My constituents remember the victims, people who went to school with these victims.

"It would be immoral, wrong and frankly dangerous to release this disgraceful murderer of two children."

Thing is, though, what's the point of prison then? Why not just kill murderers?

Gurke and Hare

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #3 on: June 07, 2021, 07:05:09 PM »
Thing is, though, what's the point of prison then? Why not just kill murderers?

He'd probably agree with that though, the Tory fucker. I wish some media outlet would ask him exactly why he disagrees, pushing until they get an answer beyond just "I don't like it". Ask him specifically at what step of their deliberations the parole board has got it wrong. Has he read the 1100 pages of evidence that they considered?

Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #4 on: June 07, 2021, 07:05:55 PM »
Why not just kill murderers?

They probably will.

Butchers Blind

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #5 on: June 07, 2021, 07:06:49 PM »
Maybe get the word 'NONCE' tattooed on his forehead like that CaB favourite from a couple of months ago.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #6 on: June 07, 2021, 07:08:28 PM »
Apparently he will be given a new identity. From the courtroom artist's drawing, he now looks like the son of Dominic Cummings and Gregg Wallace.

imitationleather

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #7 on: June 07, 2021, 07:09:51 PM »
What name will he post on here under?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #8 on: June 07, 2021, 07:17:19 PM »
Colin Pitchfork sounds exactly like a CaB pseudonym.

Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #9 on: June 07, 2021, 07:18:05 PM »
He's too late for Wimblewrong.

bigfatheart

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #10 on: June 07, 2021, 07:26:47 PM »
Maybe he can replace Gary Lineker in the Walker's adverts, starting with a remake of this? He's more palatable and less threatening to most of the media.

imitationleather

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #11 on: June 07, 2021, 07:31:26 PM »
Maybe he can replace Gary Lineker in the Walker's adverts, starting with a remake of this? He's more palatable and less threatening to most of the media.

Finding a job after prison can be hard, but the BT Sport Champions League presenter job has just come up for grabs...

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #12 on: June 07, 2021, 07:32:04 PM »
If my last name was Pitchfork and I was planning on murdering people, I'd do it with a pitchfork.

imitationleather

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #13 on: June 07, 2021, 07:33:32 PM »
And we wonder why more double murderers don't pos... Actually there's bloody loads on here, aren't there?

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #14 on: June 07, 2021, 07:34:42 PM »
It must be difficult explaining to someone who was in prison for 33 years how the world has changed. It will be hard to find him a job, even though he was a skilled sculptor of cake decorations according to Wikipedia.

I remember watching that Netflix drama about a recently released murderer which changed my attitude on released prisoners, although there is a lot of difference between killing one person by accident and raping and killing two people. I wonder why he did it.

imitationleather

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #15 on: June 07, 2021, 07:37:50 PM »
even though he was a skilled sculptor of cake decorations according to Wikipedia.

His most recent commission:

Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #16 on: June 07, 2021, 07:41:51 PM »
He's going to fly off the handle once he sees Greggs has branched out into vegan food and salads.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #17 on: June 07, 2021, 07:51:50 PM »
Apparently he exposed himself to over 1,000 women. He strangled his victims in order to protect his identity.

Let's hope he is a changed man.

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #18 on: June 07, 2021, 07:54:07 PM »
Apparently he will be given a new identity.


Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #19 on: June 07, 2021, 07:57:25 PM »
Did the person who took the blood test for Pitchfork ever face any consequences?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colin_Pitchfork

O
Quote
n 1 August 1987, one of Pitchfork's colleagues at the bakery, Ian Kelly, revealed to fellow workers in a Leicester pub (The Clarendon) that he had taken the blood test while masquerading as Pitchfork. Pitchfork told Kelly that he could not give blood under his own name because he had already given blood while pretending to be a friend of his who had wanted to avoid being harassed by police because of a youthful conviction for burglary. A woman who overheard the conversation reported it to police.[2]

On 19 September 1987, Pitchfork was arrested.[7] During subsequent questioning, Pitchfork admitted to exposing himself to more than 1,000 women, a compulsion that began in his early teens. He later progressed to sexual assault and then to strangling his victims in order to protect his identity. He pleaded guilty to the two rapes/murders in addition to another incident of sexual assault, and was sentenced to life imprisonment.[8] The Lord Chief Justice at the time of his sentencing said: "From the point of view of the safety of the public I doubt if he should ever be released."[9] The Secretary of State set a minimum term of 30 years; in 2009, Pitchfork's sentence was reduced on appeal to 28 years.[10]

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #20 on: June 07, 2021, 07:58:50 PM »
What name will he post on here under?

Found him:
https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?action=profile;u=3522

He must have made an account on one of those small phones that people smuggle in inside their bottom.

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #21 on: June 07, 2021, 08:00:16 PM »
Is there a log somewhere of the rate of repeat offending incidents of people released after more than 20+ years inside?


Zetetic

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #22 on: June 07, 2021, 08:00:53 PM »
Did the person who took the blood test for Pitchfork ever face any consequences?
Ian Kelly was charged with obstructing the course of justice and given a suspended sentence of 18 months, based on a bit of Googling. (Can't find a very solid source.)

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #23 on: June 07, 2021, 08:05:53 PM »
Thank you.


Catalogue of ills

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #25 on: June 07, 2021, 08:43:47 PM »
What name will he post on here under?

Colin Allmusic

Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #26 on: June 07, 2021, 09:07:06 PM »
This case was in my local news throughout the mid-80s.  It livened up my ghoulish teens.

The Mollusk

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #27 on: June 07, 2021, 09:16:18 PM »
Not only did he kill two young girls, he’s also responsible for the 4.9/10 review for The Mars Volta’s first album. The man is a monster.

Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #28 on: June 07, 2021, 09:16:40 PM »
Colin Pilchard would be a nice unobtrusive name for his new identity.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Welcome Home, Colin!
« Reply #29 on: June 07, 2021, 09:18:39 PM »
Not only did he kill two young girls, he’s also responsible for the 4.9/10 review for The Mars Volta’s first album. The man is a monster.

Interesting to think how many reviews for things are made by convicts; I mean they've got the time.

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