Author Topic: Only Fools and Horses  (Read 24431 times)

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #420 on: June 17, 2021, 03:03:25 PM »
Remember when David Jason got shingles and Harry Seacombe stood in as Del for three episodes? Nobody noticed till months afterwards.

Hello folks! It's the famous Del Boy here. Del Boooooooooooooooooooooooy! Speaking to you from the Nags Head. Ahum. Now where is that brother of mine, Rodney? You PLOOOOONKEEEER! [hits excruciating high notes all glasses in bar shatter. Not a single regular viewer notices the difference or why Del Boy is black and white when the rest of the program is in colour]

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #421 on: June 17, 2021, 03:24:26 PM »
Remember that episode when they were desperately looking for another flat because they all could have sworn that Nelson Mandela house had been knocked down years ago?

I can.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #422 on: June 17, 2021, 03:30:31 PM »
Remember that series when the Trotters became a born again Christians and suffixed all of their catchphrases with "Amen"?

"Rodney, you plonker! Amen."

"Drink up Trig, drink up, we're leaving. Amen."

"Rodney, I've lost our baby. Amen."

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #423 on: June 17, 2021, 03:44:22 PM »
Just thinking about that episode where Boycie is radicalised by Al Qaeda and he suicide bombs the Nag's Head with an explosive device hidden in his moustache. The scene where Albert's sat in the rubble, tears streaming from his eyes, trying to get Elsie Partridge to wake up is heartbreaking.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #424 on: June 17, 2021, 04:36:52 PM »

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #425 on: June 17, 2021, 04:53:57 PM »
Aha.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #426 on: June 17, 2021, 05:03:01 PM »
An underrated episode is the one where Del Boy takes over from Mike as the manager of the Nags Head. He hits on the brilliant idea of making it a venue for indie bands, but unfortunately after an infamous mancunian frontman gets plastered and raises havoc, he is forced to bar the Fall.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #427 on: June 17, 2021, 05:03:01 PM »
Anyone remember the Christmas special where Del comes home with a PC and he's playing Yoshi's Island on ZSNES and Rodney ends up spending the next six hours trying to set up Retroarch for him?

"Stone the bladdy crows, Rodney, anuvva crash back to the bleedin' desktop?"

"I dunno, do I Del, I downloaded the full Dreamcast BIOS pack and everyfing!"

"Dunno why you boys are so obsessed wiv da bladdy Dreamcast. Do-win-da-woh all we 'ad was Sega Master System II's wiv Alex Kidd built in and we lavved it. You'd finish a level and e'd be sat vere eatin' an Emperor burgah."

"Oh, shut up you soppy old tart!"

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #428 on: June 17, 2021, 05:06:33 PM »
It was never the same after Del regenerated into Reg Varney

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #429 on: June 17, 2021, 05:08:38 PM »
Getting guest stars to play Boycie was a good idea in theory but Andrew Dice Clay was never going to work.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #430 on: June 17, 2021, 08:53:38 PM »
Yeah, but getting Tarantino in was a hell of a coup. Bit harsh killing “Gary”, but at least it led to this classic scene…

DEL: Mmm! Mange tout, Boycie! This is the creme de la menthe! Usually, me and Rodney would be happy with a cheeseburger, but he springs these Emperor burgers on us! What takeaway is this?

BOYCIE: Knock it off, Del Boy.

DEL: What?

BOYCIE: I don't need you to tell me how bleeding good my burgers are, okay? I'm the one who buys them, I know how good they are. When Marlene orders a takeaway, she buys crap. Me, I buy the gourmet expensive stuff because when I eat it, I want to taste it. But you know what's on my mind right now? It isn’t the burgers in my kitchen, it's the dead Gary in my garage.

DEL: Oh, Boycie, don't even worry about that--

BOYCIE: No, I want to ask you a question, Derek. When you came pulling in here, did you notice a sign out in front of my house that said Dead Gary Storage?

DEL: Boycie, you know I haven’t seen--

BOYCIE: Did you notice a sign out in front of my house that said "Dead Gary Storage"?!

DEL: No, I didn't.

BOYCIE: And do you know why you didn't see that sign?

DEL: Why?

BOYCIE: Because it’s not there. Because storing dead Garys isn’t my bleeding business, that's why!

idunnosomename

  • FROG ON THE BIG WHEEL
Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #431 on: June 17, 2021, 09:18:15 PM »
BAKA NO HORSURU!! GANBARE!!!

DEL-SAN: UUUUU-WAAA! RODNEY-KUN, HALF-PRICE CRACKED ICE KUDASAI!!!

RODNEY-KUN: *SWEATDROP*

DEL-SAN: ANTA-PLONKA? *HITS HIM WITH MASSIVE MALLET*

ALBERT-SAMA: AHHH! CRUSTY GIRLS PANTIES???

*everyone faints*

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #432 on: June 17, 2021, 10:29:40 PM »



Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #433 on: June 18, 2021, 02:46:05 PM »
Tell me how anyone...get me a jury... tell me how you can say "in Peckham" and I'll go down on you. If you'll excuse me for saying so.

Don't you want to be saying it over a big bowl of cracked ice? Isn't that the fun of it?

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #434 on: June 18, 2021, 03:14:50 PM »
loss.jpg followed by alex kidd emperor burger is this thread's falling through the bar

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #435 on: June 18, 2021, 03:26:14 PM »
There is an Only Fools And Horses grumble film parody called Only Fools And Arses. Parts of it appear to have a laugh track.


Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #436 on: June 18, 2021, 03:37:06 PM »
There is an Only Fools And Horses grumble film parody called Only Fools And Arses. Parts of it appear to have a laugh track.

For authenticity they should have recorded it in front of a live studio audience.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #437 on: June 18, 2021, 03:45:18 PM »
tell me how you can say "in Peckham" and I'll go down on you.


Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #438 on: June 18, 2021, 04:59:38 PM »
There is an Only Fools And Horses grumble film parody called Only Fools And Arses. Parts of it appear to have a laugh track.

Trigger (polishing medal): I've maintained this nob for 20 years. It's had 17 new purple heads and 14 new shafts in its time, plus a couple of replacement balls.

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #439 on: June 18, 2021, 05:26:39 PM »
Del-End Boy and Rod-Knee.

This may be kink-shaming, but who watches an episode of Only Fools and Horses and feels turned on? Turned on enough for there to be demand for a grumble parody?

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #440 on: June 18, 2021, 05:37:48 PM »
Considering how many fetishes come from exposure to media when people are really young, do you think there is someone who can only really run the flag up if a chandelier falls on them?

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #441 on: June 18, 2021, 05:38:18 PM »
[Blue Jam bad sex]
"I've got one pair of aces..."
"Yes!"
"And another..."
"Don't stop!"

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #442 on: June 18, 2021, 05:38:46 PM »
If Del had four aces and called it as two pair, wouldn't he lose?

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #443 on: June 18, 2021, 05:41:45 PM »
Del Boy falls through the bar (while his big stiff prick sprays spunk everywhere!!)

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #444 on: June 18, 2021, 05:45:14 PM »
Trigger does o face.

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #445 on: June 18, 2021, 07:44:54 PM »
Albert reacts


Better Midlands

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #446 on: June 18, 2021, 07:59:37 PM »

Fambo Number Mive

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #447 on: June 21, 2021, 05:47:25 PM »
Talk To Transformer adds to the OFAH theme lyrics

Quote
Stick a pony in me pocket,
I'll fetch the suitcase from the van.
Cos if you want the best 'uns,
But you don't ask questions,
Then brother, I'm your man.
Cos where it all comes from is a mystery,
It's like the changin' of the seasons,
And the tides of the sea.
But here's the one that's drivin' me beserk,
Why do only fools and horses work?
Of course, at first sight, that sounds odd,
'Cause horses are generally reckoned to be dumb;
But my rider on his back was clever enough.
So what's the matter with a bit,
When it's bent just like this?
Now, look here,
A bit, or biter, as the case may be,
Is not a bit and a horse.
Rather, it's a beast who makes himself
the go-between
With that brute called the bit.
And how did this piece of double-talk get its name?
Well, if you ask me,
You're a bigger fool
Than I ever was;
For

Quote
We've got some half price cracked ice and miles and miles of carpet
tiles,
T.V.s, deep freeze and David Bowie L.P.s,
Ball games, gold chains, whatsnames, pictures frames and leather
goods,
And Trevor Francis track suits from a mush in Shepherds Bush,
Bush, bush, bush, bush, bush, bush, bush ...
No income tax, no V.A.T.,
No money back, no guarante'e' of future develo
p.
Take the bus to Stratford, or the tube to Newham or Leyton,
Or you can walk down the dock quays and the Jubilee line will take
you anywhere.
Soon, you'll be able to get from
Billingsgate to Westfield, anywhere in the country, any-wher!
All you need do is download a special map!
FOR SALE...
- Clothes/sun creams/glasses/jelly babies/cushions/shoes/birds nests/dung/golf clubs/slippers/car trouble
- Dollar coins/Christmas crackers/compost/T.V.s/cash money/jelly

idunnosomename

  • FROG ON THE BIG WHEEL
Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #448 on: June 22, 2021, 10:32:54 AM »
More jelly, Del?

Yes Rodders!!

As well as the birds nests?

Yes Rodders!!!

And the dung?

YES RODDERS

Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #449 on: June 22, 2021, 10:36:50 AM »
The famous Emperor Burger scene was cut out of repeats as a mark of respect to Leonard Pierce who died of an Emperor Burger related illness.

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