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"At Christmas I no more desire a rose Than wish a snow in May's new-fangled mirth; But like of each thing that in season grows."


Only Fools and Horses

Started by Leej88, June 08, 2021, 05:27:09 PM

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kalowski

QuoteOnly Fools and Horses fans mourn the death of its star, David Jason, better known as wheeler dealer Derek "Del-Boy" Trotter.

The actor, who played the family's hapless but endearing middle man Derek since the beginning in 1980's Only Fools and Horses, died suddenly at the age of 61 on Wednesday. He died in the early hours of the morning at his London home.

Friends and co-stars of Jason have said the star "died doing what he loved, in the arms of a lover". The star was found dead at his home in St John's Wood, central London.

A post mortem has been carried out but the cause of death is still unclear.

Fans took to Twitter to pay tribute to the actor - who recently finished work on the latest series of Only Fools and Horses - and posted fond memories of his comedic ability.

One wrote: "RIP to you Derek and you will be missed. You were a true comic and will be much missed."

A BBC spokesman said the star had been receiving treatment for "stress and exhaustion" and the cause of death is not yet known.

"We are deeply saddened to hear of the death of our long-standing colleague David Jason. He was an outstanding and much-loved actor and comedian," they said in a statement.

"The BBC will pay tribute to him at the earliest opportunity. David will be remembered fondly by everyone who had the good fortune to work with him."

A source at his production company Red Production Company said: "It is a tragic, terrible shock. He loved doing the show."

The actor's daughter, Charlotte, 24, who is an actress and writer, broke her silence about the death to The Times.

"I think my mum and dad are very private people but it was a very private situation for them. I'm very sad for my dad," she said.

jenna appleseed

Quote from: canadagoose on July 20, 2021, 09:25:52 PM
Can you put it on an emperor burger?

That's exactly what Uncle Albert's thinking in that photo. They missed a trick not sticking that classic line on the box.

bonus fact: that episode has an extra non-special guest appearance of Paul McCartney being (three)wheeled on for a reprise of We're So Sorry, Uncle Albert, after the classic callback of him discovering this so called 'hot' chili sauce ruins your genuine Emperor Burger by making it taste just like an ordinary cheese burger.

For the end credits of the last ever, ever, no we really mean it this time, episode (ever), the usual theme tune was replaced by a special song reworking by McCartney dedicated to the broken down three wheeler seen getting towed away in the episode. "My car, he got three wheels, but he can't run".

(Paul McCartney nearly refused to appear in the series because he didn't want to be seen endorsing burgers made of penguins. Fortunately the BBC managed to solve this problem by throwing lots of money at him until he was finally convinced the burger was really made out of Linda's special cow friendly Vegan 'cheese'. )

franticplanet

Quote from: jenna appleseed on July 20, 2021, 09:16:30 PM


I remember they got a massive fine for the BBC for product placement, after building the whole episode around Eddie Del and Rodders testing out the sauces by sticking a funnel down Syd's Albert's urethra and pouring them in, bottle after bottle, "just to make sure."

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy fell down Rodney's hole.  Rodney usually spent his time cavorting in some public place, and eventually his bushy eyebrows would brush against the top of the water-filled hole at the back of the flat. The flat's only window, facing on to the rear of the garage, was often left open at this point, and as Del Boy stood in the confines of the hole, you could see not only his cap but even a more distinct peak of the rest of his face, reflecting the light from the naked bulb of the block's tiny lampshade. When he lifted his face out of the water, the resultant expression always looked somewhere between that of a starving dolphin and a deer who's just spotted a snack: he was always hungry, he was always slightly shocked, and he was always pleased.

This was a wonderful moment, because as ridiculous as it sounds, it perfectly captured the genius of the show. There's always going to be a trace of a food supplement in every television comedy show, whether it's kippers on the breast of a long-suffering subaltern, or a soup with flounders in John Cleese's Fawlty Towers. But Only Fools and Horses had a surplus, a surplus of food, because the flat's heating system was clearly,

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy fell down Rodney's hole.  The thought of Del putting himself through that nightmare had never occurred to me. But then, you're not watching Only Fools and Horses for intellectual stimulation, are you?

When watching last night's (Saturday) episode, I had to think for a moment about what had been happening during the whole season. Yes, I have enjoyed the episodes as I've gone along, but there's one that stands out from the others. The one that makes you go "Oooh!" before realising it's really got something to do with them being depressed about something.

The first is Del getting into a car after going to get some coffees from Mrs. Chums, only for a voice to suddenly yell at him. It's Rodney. And it is the most perfect entrance of all time. And this time he's not trying to rescue someone or do some other form of petty crime. Instead, he is begging for money. Rodney needs Del to help him with his friend Del Boy's Christmas lottery win.

Which is all well and good. If you have seen the first series of Only Fools and Horses, then you'll know that this plot is right up Del's alley. In the first series, Del would not take anyone's Christmas lottery

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy sold Rodney's liver to Morrissey.

The scene: Rodney and Del are in the car on the way to buy Rodney's liver from Morrissey, who supposedly has an inferior one, because when Del was a toddler, he was accidentally left on a train for three days by his parents (who, when he asked for a drink, realised they'd left him on the train) and came out a complete alcoholic.

Somewhere along the line, Morrissey's driver's side window suddenly whirrs up, and the same tune as when Troy's door goes up in the opening sequence plays, and we cut to Rodney, who has just been informed of Morrissey's new liver, and he falls down.

Morrissey: Who the f*** are you? What are you doing? Get out of the car! Who the f*** are you?

Rodney: Morrissey, sir! Rodney Trotter, sir! We're selling your liver!

Morrissey: Get out of the car! Get out of the car! Who the f*** are you?

Rodney: I'm a transplant surgeon, sir. We're the Rodney Trotter Transplant Company. We've been running an ad in the paper for years.

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy sold Rodney's liver to Morrissey.

Although I'm in no way comparing them, I can't help feeling that two people who've spent their entire lives living in their own personal fantasy have been living out their final days in an equally fantastic, but far more morbid, nightmare.

It's funny really, because before the show went off air, Ian Holm had told us that the second episode had been written in a farcical, slapstick style, like that scene, and it worked out very well. It made the show look more authentic, as the episode was being shot with a certain style and verve. It also gave us a glimpse into how Del and Rodney lived.

The whole reason they lived together in the first place was because Rodney had sold Del's liver to Morrissey - a man who'd been trying to sell his to Del for the best part of twenty years. In that series, we saw the wonderful moment when the Mancunian pop legend told his salesman, 'I won't do it for less than a tenner, Del Boy.'

It was a brilliant piece of writing, especially when you think about the number of times we'd seen the pair trade barbs, insults, banter and threats in previous episodes, and how well it served

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy sold Rodney's liver to Morrissey. It's funny, it's witty, it's richly satirical, but it's also emotional. Because there are people who actually want to be Morrissey. And their existence is proof that nobody should give a fuck about what he thinks.

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Morrissey: You're a wonderful singer, and your lyrics are particularly cogent. I'm sure that's the reason why I bought your first album.

Del Boy: Aw, you're just being sweet. You've only just got it on.

Morrissey: Yes, I do have it on. I bought it for its practical value as an instructional guide.

Del Boy: Oh, Morrissey, I'm sorry. I don't mean to insult you, but you know, I always think you look like you haven't washed in weeks.

Morrissey: (Pause.) But I don't know about your other album.

Del Boy: It's all right. There's a good song on it.

Morrissey: I'm sure it is. But I'm not sure it's one I'm going to be very familiar with.

Del Boy: (Smugly.) It's called Fuckin' Paedo

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Trigger ate Uncle Albert's beard.

What's not to like?

Here's a scene from the episode, "When the Whistle Blows."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-dsiA-sO-8

If that hasn't got you in stitches, what will?

If you've never seen the episode, the clip above is merely a montage of the comedy bits that take place throughout the episode.

I'm going to be blunt about this. In today's political climate, it seems like a lot of people are trying to ban beards. And, because I'm a real softy, I'd like to make the case that perhaps beards aren't all that bad, after all.

My particular theory here is that most people who want to ban beards are people who have been told they need to shave. Some folks go so far as to believe that shaving is somehow the path to health.

They're wrong.

Shaving is not a healthy activity. In fact, shaving is more likely to be harmful to your health. If you ask my personal physician, he will tell you that he has no medical problems associated with my beard. Not to brag, but
Quote
Of all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy and Boycie both got the same tapeworm.

It's a terrifically funny moment, of course, but it also features a nice illustration of two best mates showing their appreciation for one another by doing something silly for them. I recently interviewed Richard Holloway, who was both the stand-up performer who played Jack the Lazy in the episode, and the actor who played the fictional Chalky White.

"That's an unusual form of friendship, isn't it, Chalky?" asks Del.

"That's the way we roll," replies Chalky.

This exchange has always stuck with me, because it seems to sum up the theme of the series very nicely. To me, this scene symbolises a friendship which is all about doing stuff together, sharing the good times, and making the most of life.

One of the things I like most about Only Fools and Horses is how it explores a variety of themes, from exploring the pressures of family life, to the (then-controversial) topic of the menopause.

The classic 'Paul's Perm' sequence, featuring a sequence of iconic moments that are packed full of comedy and some genuinely moving moments

Quote
Of all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy and Boycie both got the same tapeworm.
It was, without doubt, the show's most spectacular visual gag.

For those unfamiliar with the series, there are only two regular characters – Del Boy and his sidekick Rodney. To explain what happens in that episode, it's probably easiest to set up the storyline first.

When Del arrives at a hotel, he realises that his stomach has been complaining for days, but no one else is showing any signs of illness. He decides to stay in his room and starve the thing out.

Unfortunately for Del, he makes a complete mess of things. He tries to shove a stack of hotel leaflets into his stomach as a snack, but this creates such a big reaction, he is rushed to hospital. He is also given a liver scan, to see whether the tapeworm is causing any damage to his liver.

In fact, he's so seriously ill, he is forced to leave the hospital early. So his pal Rodney sets up an internet dating service for them both, called 'Grandad at 90'.

The thing is, they didn't realise that Grandad was really the doctor. As it happens, the test results reveal that Del's tapeworm is

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy shot Rodney on purpose for no reason. As he crouched over the wound, his only utterance was "There goes my leaden innards". The reaction of the cast and crew was absolutely brilliant, their awe at Del Boy's sudden enlightenment, so much so that one of them had the poor sense to shoot Del off screen, while the rest of them gave it their full support. What a great moment in a great show.

It was, I'm sure you'll agree, one of the best moments in the show's eight year run, and now we've just been presented with our next big classic moment. What do you think?

Well, if the trailer's anything to go by, this series will be every bit as brilliant as its predecessor. If you thought that Gaz's return from jail in last year's 'The Day the Earth Caught Fire' wasn't going to give us any action then we can safely tell you that you don't know your sitcoms from your interplanetary junk mail. In a new year that will probably be up to par for Doctor Who fans too, with the announcement that Matt Smith is leaving the show at the end of
Quote
Of all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  time Del Boy shot Rodney on purpose for no reason. There are some fundamental problems with this story that can't be discussed too in-depth because they go beyond the very meaning of what we as a society consider to be morally acceptable or justifiable. Let me just come straight out with it – shooting someone without cause in any circumstance, even in self-defense, is completely unacceptable. That being said, only fool would find themselves in a position where they would need to pull the trigger in order to survive. So what went wrong here?

First of all, Rodney had proven to Del over and over again that he is a liability and that he shouldn't be trusted. For example, in the episode "European Import" Rodney was pushed too far and snapped. In the following episode, "Quiet Night", he killed a chicken for Del, knowing full well that Del could be charged for doing so, knowing full well that if he found out, he could lose his job and go to prison. So Rodney did a pretty bad thing. Del had already warned him a hundred times that Rodney wasn't supposed to take advantage of him. So it's not as though Rodney had no other choice. In fact, there were a couple of very good options here.

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  scene where Del tells Mike his penis is haunted by a camp ghost. This is in the episode 'Dance with the one who brung you', the episode in which Del decides to get his manhood shrunk and is eventually handed the entire castration kit. As the scene plays out, Del (Del Boy) is sitting on the edge of a bed, looking at his smaller-than-normal penis in a dressing table mirror. As he puts the kit down, the bathroom door opens and Del turns to look at the person who has just entered the room. He's staring straight at Del's penis, and it's as if the ghost of Jimmy Stone is gazing at him. "It was as if he had come out of nowhere," says Del. "And he was staring right at me, and he wasn't laughing, and he wasn't smiling, and he was very serious."

I think this is the first time that Del has spoken about Jimmy Stone in any kind of personal way. Although he has talked about him many times before, the episodes where he actually addresses Jimmy directly have all been in connection with some kind of supernatural incident. This was a perfect opportunity for Del to let out his feelings about Jimmy, and this episode (

QuoteOf all the classic moments from Only Fools and Horses, the one that I remember most fondly is the  scene where Del tells Mike his penis is haunted by a camp ghost.

For a moment, Mike pauses. Then, slowly, he realises what Del is on about. He looks at the bulge in his trousers and realises that, yes, his cock is actually infested with something that wants to kill him.

Mike's face is a mixture of fear and amusement.

"You what?" he says.

"A ghost. It's an Indian ghost," says Del. "That means it's not going to bother you," adds Rodney.

Rodney is right. Ghosts don't go around murdering people. So why do I feel a sense of relief as I watch Mike contemplate the implications of Del's advice?

Is it because I remember my own initial panic at Del's words? Or perhaps it's because I've had a bit of a dark week and Del's haunted penis story made me smile?

I suppose it's a bit of both.

Whatever the reason, it's brought home to me the importance of humour. Humour in its most benign form. The kind of comedy that makes you smile, rather

Fambo Number Mive

Del Boy offers to collect rubbish from businesses at a cheap rate than the council but he just packs it up Uncle Albert's arsehole and after 5 tonnes Albert's skin can't expand any further and he shits out a load of chemical waste all over Del Boy's new suit.

Meanwhile Boycie and Micky Pearce can't stop playing Parkour and Mike ends up breaking their balls. And Rodney tries to go an entire hour without masturbating - but Del's put him in charge of selling second hand adult magazines in the market. Can Rodney sell a sticky pile of Swank magazines without nipping off for a pull of the old penis?

Fambo Number Mive

Remember when Del Boy was in The Independent Group For Change?

QuoteDelboy has done many questionable things throughout his life including...

...The best friend of George W Bush, the most famous friend of Saddam Hussein, being paid more than a million pounds per month by the Iraqi government.

Being a member of what used to be called the Liberal Democrats, but now is called the Lib Dem Party.

Being a member of the Labour Party and then the 'Independent' Party.

Being in the New Statesman, the Guardian, and the Observer.

Not being in the Labour Party and the Guardian anymore.

Being friends with David Cameron (see below) and various people in the Conservative Party who share his views.

Not being in the Conservative Party any more (although he is still a member).

Having a TV series funded by both Channel 4 and the BBC...

Del Boy helped kill JFK

QuoteDel boy has done many questionable things throughout his life including...

  * • Stealing money for the mob in Sicily and, years later, helping the FBI in the JFK hit in Cuba
  * • Stealing a million dollars from a casino in Reno, and selling the car to a high-stakes game player who ran it through a series of dealerships before it was found in the garage of a dead junkie.
  * • Stealing an antique painting from a Manhattan art gallery for about $500.
  * • Hiring himself out as a hit man for a gang lord in South Central Los Angeles.
  * • Shooting and robbing a gas station at gunpoint, and then running away and shooting his robbery victim in the buttocks.

Now, back in New York, having been released on bail, his new employer is the infamous Tony Soprano. He's got a new car, a nice suit, and a good job, but the money from the heist in Reno has been spent, so for a year

mrClaypole

The episode where they dig up Grandad.  Uncle Albert slopes off dejected.

Viewing figures.  22.3 million

idunnosomename

Remember that episode where Del gets some 2-4-5 Trioxin off the back of a lorry and accidentally reanimates Cassandra's miscarriage? Then Peckham is annihilated by a tactical nuke. Of course you don't, it's not really canon with the series.

QuoteMarlene: Do you ever wonder about all the different ways of dying? You know, violently? And wonder, like, what would be the most horrible way to die?
Trigger: I try not too think about dying too much.
Marlene: Mm. Well for me, the worst way would be for a bunch of old men to get around me, and start biting and eating me alive.
Trigger: I see.

Fambo Number Mive

One episode I enjoyed was when Del Boy brought a new apron and cooked a meal in the buff for all the Nag's Head Regulars, followed by a "sexy dance" only to ask people to lick coffee off his hairy chest rather than gravy. Uncle Albert's fault of course.

willbo

Rodney moves into Rising Damp and loses his virginity to Miss Jones, then Rigsby and Del Boy wrestle for the right to keep him.

Fambo Number Mive

QuoteMy favourite quote from Only Fools and Horses is when Del, Rodney and Uncle Albert are in a pub and they see Del's old mate in the corner and Del goes:

'He's here isn't he?'

'You know him?'

'He's the one who came to my house with a gun when I was twelve, remember?'

'Well yes, of course I remember!'

'I've seen him a couple of times since then, but you've changed your face haven't you?'

'That's right! We've had plastic surgery.'

'That's right! You've had the nose changed to a banana, your ears were swapped for an arse-hopper, and you've been given a haircut.'
Remember when newspaper pundits were advising Corbyn to behave more like Rodney?

QuoteMy favourite quote from Only Fools and Horses is Rodney Trotter's response to being beaten up by the IRA after being caught stealing £13 worth of cigarettes in 1978. "No problem," he replied, "I've got another £13 on me," and promptly went and bought another pound of fags.

This is how the modern Labour party should behave, but instead of going for a vote of no confidence, Corbyn is doing something far more stupid.

The moment when he lost his nerve has been revealed. It was April 2017. With just weeks to go until the general election, Labour's campaign was lurching into action, Corbyn was out stumping the country and his opponents were gearing up for the fight of their lives.

He was going to need to pull something special out of the bag, because his party was in a dire state. The polls were a disaster, and after three years out of power, it was a very dark day.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

Quote from: willbo on July 22, 2021, 07:41:30 PM
Rodney moves into Rising Damp and loses his anal virginity to Rigsby, then Rigsby and Del Boy Turkish wrestle for the right to bum him.

Fambo Number Mive

Remember Only Fools and Horses Later? Where there was a bit more nudity and Del Boy sometimes said "fuck"?


JamesTC

First promo image of Rodders and Del in the new series


markburgle

Dark memories of series 24, late 90's. The Rodney mid-life-crisis LSD-binge plotline culminates with a bottle episode inside a psyhe-ward rubber room.

A hellish, looping 30 minutes in which every character besides Rodders appears only as warped hallucinations, uttering little besides increasingly aggressive catchphrases.

Climaxes with Rodders a gibbering wreck, seeing visions of his friends and loved ones bouncing round him on space hoppers chanting

PLONKER PLONKER
ROD-ER-NY TROT-TER
PLONKER PLONKER
DURIN NA WO-WAR

for literally 5 solid minutes while Trigger, adopting the pose of Munch's The Scream, just howls "DAVE" in his face over and over before a final, savage cut to black. No end credits that night, just the phone number for Samaritans.

Am I the only one who found that all a bit much?

Fambo Number Mive

Remember when Micky Pearce got his bum out in the Nag's Head and everyone applauded apart from Uncle Albert who said that he used to do that during the war, and then Del and Rodney had to stop Albert getting his bum out? That episode was censored on Netflix due to their being naked buttocks in it.


kalowski

Remember the US version
L-R: Del-Boy, Rodney and Uncle Albert

franticplanet

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 24, 2021, 04:54:03 PM
Remember when Micky Pearce got his bum out in the Nag's Head and everyone applauded apart from Uncle Albert who said that he used to do that during the war, and then Del and Rodney had to stop Albert getting his bum out? That episode was censored on Netflix due to their being naked buttocks in it.

It was made worse by Buster Merryfield suffering with a visibly prolapsed anus resulting from falling up the stairs at the Comedy Awards, which was poking out of his hole like a red inner tube on a BMX until David Jason popped it back in for him with a thumb.

Fambo Number Mive

Quote from: kalowski on July 24, 2021, 05:54:16 PM
Remember the US version
L-R: Del-Boy, Rodney and Uncle Albert


Loved the episode where they pissed on Del Boy's rug and Albert was waving his WWII revolver around.

kalowski

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 24, 2021, 06:28:17 PM
Loved the episode where they pissed on Del Boy's rug and Albert was waving his WWII revolver around.
"You plonker, Rodney, you're out of your element!"

There was that one where Del Boy leant his house to two mates who abused kids there, supposedly without his knowledge.

Fambo Number Mive

Remember when the Trotters went to a CAB meet and insulted one of the Cabbers?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOtVMoxEx3I


franticplanet

No income tax, no VAT,
My foreskin's tight, can't do a wee,
Black or white, rich or broke,
It don't pull back when I have a strooooooke

Quote from: Fambo Number Mive on July 24, 2021, 06:28:17 PM
Loved the episode where they pissed on Del Boy's rug and Albert was waving his WWII revolver around.

Del Boy [angrily jacking off Boycie]: This guy's fertile! I've seen jaffas before! Let me tell you: this guy fuckin' squirts
Rodney: put his todger down Del, its gone all red and everyfing

The wind blows Cassandra's miscarriage in Rodney's face.

Del Boy trashs a sportscar parked outside Johnny Speight's house, mistakenly thinking it belongs to his son. It's real owner, Carla Lane, rushes out and destroys the robin reliant with a cricket bat.