Dogtanian and the Three Muskehounds - Now in Soulless CGI!

[phantom_power]

Well is the intended audience for this children and adults? I just don't understand why anyone here gives a shit about a Dogtanian film "looking" shit. Anyway, to each his own.

I don't really give a shit. Someone posted a video. I watched it and thought it looked a bit rubs and commented accordingly. I did caveat that it looks like it is fairly true to the original in spirit, that was also badly animated but simple fun

You are right that kids don't care about these sorts of things but that doesn't mean we can't comment on it, or that good animation isn't better than bad animation

[El Unicornio, mang]

I mean, the animation on the original cartoon is a lot worse than this, from a technical standpoint.

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

It's not the animation that irritates me, it's the grating voices and Dreamworks dialogue. Oh this is going to be LOADED with "zingers" isn't it and Dogtanian is going to be obnoxious and all the characters are going to be flat and one-dimensional, which, okay, they probably were in the original too but come on. A bit of subtlety wouldn't hurt and might make it less painful for the adults who have to sit through this.

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Although the theme tune with the nonsense lyrics still kills.

Without cheating (ie without looking up the lyrics) everyone now please have a go at working out what the lyrics are.  You are even allowed to listen to the theme tune itself as an aide memoire.

Post your results in this thread, and then maybe we can get Elton John to sing them or something.

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I said at the time but when my son was four I put on a film called Leo the Lion (with who he shares a name) and he was excited to watch it. He was soon disappointed but I was angry. The animation was actually painful to watch. Some of the time you couldn't tell what was going on apart from that it was causing a headache.

Consequently this entire anecdote is a lie.

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Kids love farting, it's obligatory. Hey Duggee? Farter. Sarah and Duck? Constantly farting. Mr Tumble? Big farter. Octonauts? Octofarters more like. Go Jetters? Go Farters. And so on and so forth. Essential.

You try saying Transfarters though in this day and age and you get thrown in the North Sea.

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Given that they're supposed to be musketeers, why do they have swords rather than muskets?

Given that they're all dogs, why have they specifically named one of their kind "Dogtanian"?

[philm]

Given that they're all dogs, why have they specifically named one of their kind "Dogtanian"?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manfred_Mann_(musician) Manfred Mann?

[Johnny Textface]

You are right that kids don't care about these sorts of things but that doesn't mean we can't comment on it, or that good animation isn't better than bad animation

I'm afraid it does. Sorry about that.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Without cheating (ie without looking up the lyrics) everyone now please have a go at working out what the lyrics are.  You are even allowed to listen to the theme tune itself as an aide memoire.

Post your results in this thread, and then maybe we can get Elton John to sing them or something.

All for one and one for all, Muskahounds are always something, something something something something, something something something, something something something something, something something something, something something something, right up your fucking nose hole.

Pretty sure I'm right there, though might have forgotten the odd bit.

[dissolute ocelot]

Didn't know till now that Dogtanian was based on a real dog person, Charles de Batz de Castelmore d'Artagnan.

According to this, French musketeers like other musketeers fought primarily with muskets (either as infantry or dragoons, i.e. mounted troops who get off their horses and shoot people), but were also known for their high spirits, bants, larks, and being less posh than other elite regiments, which is where the books come in, even if they make lots of stuff up. Should probably get James Corden to play Dogtanian then.

[Ron Maels Moustache]

Without cheating (ie without looking up the lyrics) everyone now please have a go at working out what the lyrics are.  You are even allowed to listen to the theme tune itself as an aide memoire.

Post your results in this thread, and then maybe we can get Elton John to sing them or something.

Oh, too easy!

One for all and all for one
Muskehounds are always ready
One for all and all for one
Helping everybody
One for all and all for one
It's a pretty story
Sharing everything with fun
That's the way to be

One for all and all for one
Muskehounds are always steady
One for all and all for one
Helping everybody
One for all and all for one
Could sound pretty corny
If you've got a problem chum,
Think how it could be

Duddadum, duddadum
They cross their hearts and pray
Duddadum, duddadum
They cross their swords night and day
Duddadum, duddadum
They drink their beer and swear
They're faithful to their king

Duddadum, duddadum
No matter what you say
Duddadum, duddadum
They're never far away
Duddadum, duddadum
They're always ready to fight
Or to sing

(first two verses repeat til end)

[Johnny Textface]

Didn't The Stone Roses cover it?

[dissolute ocelot]

^Did you write into Philip Schofield for a free lyrics sheet?

[madhair60]

One for all and all for one,
pumping salty cum into a fucking dog mate
Yes mate I'll do the time I don't care, I need it
I need this
I need it
I don't care
I'll give it all away for this, all of it
If you don't know, you don't know
You don't know.
Helping everybody

[Johnny Textface]

One for all and all for one,
pumping salty cum into a fucking dog mate
Yes mate I'll do the time I don't care, I need it
I need this
I need it
I don't care
I'll give it all away for this, all of it
If you don't know, you don't know
You don't know.
Helping everybody

Seems a bit Radiohead

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Duddadum, duddadum
They cross their swords night and day

There is no way you worked this out for yourself.  Anyone using only their ears hears - at best - "they cross their swords night ending".


You must have cheated at some point - sorry!

Duddadum, duddadum
They drink their beer and swear

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Didn't know till now that Dogtanian was based on a real dog person, Charles de Batz de Castelmore d'Artagnan.

According to this, French musketeers like other musketeers fought primarily with muskets (either as infantry or dragoons, i.e. mounted troops who get off their horses and shoot people), but were also known for their high spirits, bants, larks, and being less posh than other elite regiments, which is where the books come in, even if they make lots of stuff up. Should probably get James Corden to play Dogtanian then.

I always thought the d'Artagnan / Dogtanian link was very obvious (they clearly worked backwards from that pun to create the show), but Muskahounds?  Doesn't work mate, even at a stretch.  Maybe that's a translation issue though.

[non capisco]

There is no way you worked this out for yourself.  Anyone using only their ears hears - at best - "they cross their swords night ending".

I remember there were loads of bit in the original Dogtanian where two of them mucked about at a urinal trough making their piss streams meet. Happened at least once an episode.

[rectorofstiffkey]

I always thought the d'Artagnan / Dogtanian link was very obvious (they clearly worked backwards from that pun to create the show), but Muskahounds?  Doesn't work mate, even at a stretch.  Maybe that's a translation issue though.

Explanation from TV tropes below.  It sounds like the original Spanish version worked  better overall for puns.  I agree with you about Muskehounds but can't do better.  Mutt-eteers?  Musketerriers?

Dogtanian is "D'Artacán" in the original Spanish. It's a pun in the original name "D'Artagnan", and the word "can" ("dog").
Also, the musketeers were called "mosqueperros", a pun using "mosqueteros" ("musketeer" in Spanish) and "perros" ("dogs").
The three musketeers had punny names in Spanish too: Antos, Pontos and Amis. The puns come from the original character names and dog breed names.

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I'd have got half way through that creative pun process (which I'm envisaging on pub napkins, way before any kind of pre-production took place) and thinking shall we just fuck this off?

And there would be two others who'd keep going with it and I'd probably just leave the project at that point.  They would be the most boring people ever.

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^Did you write into Philip Schofield for a free lyrics sheet?

Did Schofield ever do such a thing?  I remember going mad for Andy Crane's photocopied handwritten lyrics for Willy Fog. 

Willy Fog Day was our Woodstock.  If you weren't there you wouldn't understand.

[idunnosomename]

Don't dogs make musk from their anal glands? Should've done something with that.

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Very good observation.  If musk is known for inducing tears they fuckin missed a trick there.  Good marketing opportunity too.

[Butchers Blind]

I just didn't like the relationship between horse and dog in the cartoon.

[dissolute ocelot]

Did Schofield ever do such a thing?  I remember going mad for Andy Crane's photocopied handwritten lyrics for Willy Fog. 

Willy Fog Day was our Woodstock.  If you weren't there you wouldn't understand.

I must have been thinking of Willy Fog, yes. Who was from the same company BRB. Apparently they also did a show about El Cid, called Ruy, the Little Cid, which I don't think ever made it here, and David, el Gnomo (which got an English dub with Tom "Happy Days" Bosley as the Gnome and Christopher Plummer narrating).

[idunnosomename]

You speak about David the Gnome as if it isn't iconic. However all I remember is the final episode where they die and turn into trees

I think it might have been more popular in the US on Nickelodeon than here though

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I just didn't like the relationship between horse and dog in the cartoon.

I never liked the assumption that viewers should just go along with it, like it was a normal and acceptable state of affairs.

It's much like the peculiar discrepancy between Goofy and Pluto.  Fine if they are meant to inhabit separate and incompatible universes, but they hang out in the same public parks, Pluto shitting in the undergrowth while Goofy gets to do it in his upright pair of bipedal underpants.


Except Dogtanian's treatment of horses is worse because those dogs actively hate those horses and have spitefully enslaved them.  Do you ever witness Goofy enslaving Pluto?  No, you do not.

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I must have been thinking of Willy Fog, yes. Who was from the same company BRB. Apparently they also did a show about El Cid, called Ruy, the Little Cid, which I don't think ever made it here, and David, el Gnomo (which got an English dub with Tom "Happy Days" Bosley as the Gnome and Christopher Plummer narrating).

Speaking of Willy Fog, did this movie ever happen?  https://www.filmstories.co.uk/news/around-the-world-with-willy-fogg-is-becoming-a-feature-film/

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You speak about David the Gnome as if it isn't iconic. However all I remember is the final episode where they die and turn into trees

I hope the process was painful.  Gnomes are such cunts.


Surprised he wasn't called Gnavid the Gnome.  Normally writers use Gnasher speech for gnome names in order to subtract our will for life.