CaB intra-mural softball signup: 2021

[Ferris]

I'm taking a back seat this year and will be coaching and developing strategy but probably won't be playing.

Please post your stats and motivation to succeed in here, and I will post a final team sheet by end of the day.

We cannot lose to those cunts from PC Gone Mad again. It just can't happen.

Good luck!

[popcorn]

Name: popcorn
Batting average: a billion
Speed: max
Balls: big
Motivation: fear

[Ferris]

Congrats - you've made the team.

[Mr Farenheit]

I'm taking a back seat this year and will be coaching and developing strategy but probably won't be playing.

Please post your stats and motivation to succeed in here, and I will post a final team sheet by end of the day.

We cannot lose to those cunts from PC Gone Mad again. It just can't happen.

Good luck!

Pitching arm: 2kg
Jowls: 4kg
Red cards: 7
Been run over (on field): 4 times
Been run over (outside stadium): 5 times
Run people over: 7 times (car park)
Softballs worshipped: 4
Catchers sacrificed: 4
Coaches stabbed: 3 (opposing team) 7 (own team)
Stadiums razed: 2
Innings played: none
Softball frenzy factor: 7 (wild about softball)
Tattoos: 1 ('WILD ABOU' knuckles, 'TSOFT BALL!' toes)

Motivation to succeed: I've been dreaming about softballs my whole life. I can't stop now!

[Ferris]

Also made the team but on the bench for now.

[Replies From View]

I have zero motivation for this.  PE is a horrible subject and people deeply into their sports need to man the fuck up. 

Change my mind.

[Greg Torso]

Name: Gregorio F. Torzó
Height: 5' 4"
Waistline: 53"
Life expectancy: 39
Familiar: monitor lizard
Most runs in game: 144 (Budapest v Vilnius, 2003) NOT OUT
Sponsors: Silk Cut, Toolstation
Uniform: gold with silver piping, anything else I don't fucking run for shit
Rallying cry: PAY ME MOTHERFUCKER OR I DON'T MOVE FROM THIS MOUND


edit: I will not take less than CAPTAIN OF THE TEAM

[Ferris]

I have zero motivation for this.  PE is a horrible subject and people deeply into their sports need to man the fuck up. 

Change my mind.

Captain material, welcome aboard.

Name: Gregorio F. Torzó
Height: 5' 4"
Waistline: 53"
Life expectancy: 39
Familiar: monitor lizard
Most runs in game: 144 (Budapest v Vilnius, 2003) NOT OUT
Sponsors: Silk Cut, Toolstation
Uniform: gold with silver piping, anything else I don't fucking run for shit
Rallying cry: PAY ME MOTHERFUCKER OR I DON'T MOVE FROM THIS MOUND


edit: I will not take less than CAPTAIN OF THE TEAM

Sadly, not captain material. We need someone to scrub the bogs in the changing rooms if you are interested though?

[Greg Torso]

Offer rescinded immediately. Say goodbye to all that lovely Toolstation sponsor money. Have fun in the bunkers at Ljubljana.

Walking out of your life forever, chief.

[Glebe]

NAME: Glebe Arbuthnot Braithwaite Glebington IV

PITCH: 25

BATTING AVERAGE: 2

WIND SPEED: 100

ODDS: 100%

[Ferris]

Offer rescinded immediately. Say goodbye to all that lovely Toolstation sponsor money. Have fun in the bunkers at Ljubljana.

Walking out of your life forever, chief.

Our search for a bog-scrubber continues...

NAME: Glebe Arbuthnot Braithwaite Glebington IV

PITCH: 25

BATTING AVERAGE: 2

WIND SPEED: 100

ODDS: 100%

Straight onto the roster, congratulations.

You have a way about you - say, how'd you like to design the uniforms?

[touchingcloth]

Name: Touching Cloth

Games played: 0

Any other notes? I'm always doing big watery shits. I really can't hold it in, and any amount of exertion just makes me shart explosively into my pants.

[Mr Farenheit]

Also made the team but on the bench for now.

Thanks, coach!!

[Bernice]

hi coach, it's me

[Ferris]

Name: Touching Cloth

Games played: 0

Any other notes? I'm always doing big watery shits. I really can't hold it in, and any amount of exertion just makes me shart explosively into my pants.

Looks like we just found our water boy! Welcome to the team.

[Ferris]

hi coach, it's me

I like your hustle - you're in.