Figurative (not actual) death on stage/TV

[Jockice]

Worst reaction I've ever seen was circa 1982 when for some reason droll Scottish comedian Arnold Brown was chosen to support high-flying electro-poppers Yazoo on their first proper tour.

Not one laugh was to be had for the entire set, except when he told one joke (about Marilyn Monroe) and a member of the audience shouted out a better punchline. Otherwise he performed to utter silence. It was if the audience couldn't even work up the enthusiasm to boo him.

I've since seen Brown at a comedy club and he was actually quite good, but that Yazoo night was as clear a wrong time, wrong place event as I've ever seen in my life.

As for music, in the late 80s I saw a band called Slab also perform their formless Pop Group style stuff to almost total silence. The only real cheer of the night came when the singer announced 'This is our last song.' I was still waiting for the first one.

And as for TV, there's the one posted here recently of that unfunny wanker Victor Lewis-Smith going down like a bowl of sick on a Jonathan Ross show. Good. And I speak as someone who has always disliked Ross, even when all my mates were telling me how brilliant he was.

[Brundle-Fly]

That pensioner comedian on Britain's Got Talent. They add all the silly ragtime music over it in the edit to make it comedic but there was probably just silence and nervous laughter in the Apollo auditorium. Haha, look at the befuddled old man allowing nerves to get to him. Not a grain of sympathy, certainly not in this clip and ITV chose to show this on Saturday night TV.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSQWAYQfFiE

[Shit Good Nose]

As I've mentioned before I was one of those unfortunates that saw Sarah Silverman be (deservedly) shamed off the stage back in 2008.  Quite what anyone sees in her I didn't understand then and still don't now, and I think that show made a few people (including myself) realise they'd believed the hype way too much.  One of the worst live events I've ever experienced and I now tend to avoid anything she has any significant involvement in.

I also saw Lee Hurst during that enormous UK tour he did off the back of falling off his chair.  Absolute silence for most of it.  Dave Johns' twenty minute support slot went down much better with everyone.

[PlanktonSideburns]

What was the silver man show like?

[Wonderful Butternut]

Remember Linkin Park opening (technically co-headlining, but they went on first - so it was really opening) for Metallica round 2003.

This is basically the crowd reaction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCgTdlhrQ3s&ab_channel=AdultSwim

[Shit Good Nose]

What was the silver man show like?

Abysmal.

So I was told (I was only familiar with her from The Aristocrats and literally nothing else) it was mainly material that was already old at that point (after a bit someone in the audience shouted "that was funny...ten years ago"), very lame make-fun-of-someone-on-the-front-row hack stuff, very awkward improv and then a completely pointless few minutes of audience Q&A, except by then the audience was way too fucked off to be bothered.  She left the stage to barely any applause, several boos and loads of people getting up to leave before she'd even reached the curtains.

And no - I didn't see, nor was I sat next to any of the celebs who were apparently there.

EDIT - if memory serves another CaBber was also at that gig and was in a (small) pocket of the audience that received her much better than most others, but the main consensus was definitely that she was shit.  Some of the reviews over the following days......

[Brundle-Fly]

A friend of mine went to see a production of the comedy  My Night With Reg at the Criterion theatre in the West End. He said about half an hour into it, he noticed the dialogue was becoming a bit stilted and John Session's character was getting vaguer and vaguer. He also looked like the proverbial rabbit caught in headlights. The chuckling audience didn't appear to notice but my mate is an actor, had seen the play before and thought something was definitely awry when there was one too many pregnant pauses.

Eventually, one of the cast members put a maternal arm around Sessions who was as white as a sheet, and said in character, 'Sorry everybody, we're just going to have a little breakypoos', the audience laughed confusedly, the cast all gathered around John, comforting him as they made their exuent into the wings and the safety curtain came down. There was an announcement of a twenty interval to take place.

After the break, Sessions returned to the proceedings giving a bravura performance for the rest of the night, and received a standing ovation when he took his bow. To have been a fly on the wall in that dressing room,eh?  A playlet in itself.

[Brundle-Fly]

Remember Linkin Park opening (technically co-headlining, but they went on first - so it was really opening) for Metallica round 2003.

This is basically the crowd reaction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCgTdlhrQ3s&ab_channel=AdultSwim

Video unavailable message. That is a harsh reaction

[touchingcloth]

Piers Morgan's "is the answer 'jam'? People don't actually like you - does anyone here like him?" to Ian Hislop on HIGNFY is magical.

https://youtu.be/N6TcgfjcOPU

[C_Larence]

Rob Delaney on Jimmy Kimmel's late night show.
https://youtu.be/DASV-Ru6a_c

For quite a while it was impossible to find a video of it on youtube, as Delaney apparently had them all taken down. I think I originally watched it on liveleak, which is apt considering how badly he dies. I assume this one has only been allowed to stay up because the title is so flattering, albeit extremely incorrect.

[kalowski]

I saw a band called the Milltown Brothers at Sheffield University circa 1991. They were fairly ordinary indie fare but no one in the tiny audience were interested. The singer was leaping about trying to inject some energy and stood on one of the guitarist's pedals, fucking up his sound. Everyone laughed at this. Near the end the keyboard player shouted "fuck you" at the bored audience and stormed off with a couple of songs to go.

Edit: fucking hell, they're still going!

[mothman]

In 1988 a food poisoning incident saw me stuck in Rio de Janeiro for a few days longer than planned, so I took the opportunity to go to one night of the Free Music Festival (it wasn't free, that was the name of a cigarette brand). First up were Paralamas do Successo, a Brazilian band who were new then but already huge (I think they performed at the 2012 Olympics closing ceremony as part of the handover ceremony?), they had the whole audience (it was held at the Carnival venue) jumping. Absolutely terrific.

Next up were UB40, at their peak, not the embarrassment they became later. The whole crowd sang along. The Pretenders were in another night, so Chrissie Hynde came on for "I Got You Babe." Also terrific.

And to close off the night: Simple Minds! Again, at their height, they'd released the Live In The City Of Light album the year before... and they died on their arses. Very slow, melodic certainly, but God so tedious. We just retired to one of the bleachers and largely ignored the set, and left early. A massive letdown.

[PlanktonSideburns]

Abysmal.

So I was told (I was only familiar with her from The Aristocrats and literally nothing else) it was mainly material that was already old at that point (after a bit someone in the audience shouted "that was funny...ten years ago"), very lame make-fun-of-someone-on-the-front-row hack stuff, very awkward improv and then a completely pointless few minutes of audience Q&A, except by then the audience was way too fucked off to be bothered.  She left the stage to barely any applause, several boos and loads of people getting up to leave before she'd even reached the curtains.

And no - I didn't see, nor was I sat next to any of the celebs who were apparently there.

Man, there's something ace about a dying on stage story

That bundle fly one about sessions turnaround is aces

Will have to post about ginger baker's final tour complete with sofa and oxygen bottle later

[idunnosomename]

Shirley Ghostman

[Egyptian Feast]

Most acts I saw support The Fall absolutely died on their arses (except I, Ludicrous and Pins), sometimes hilariously so. They often seemed to be chosen deliberately to wind up the crowd and frequently continued playing past the point when the main act was supposed to have shown up. They were always dreadful, like the very youthful landfill indieish band, who had to have featured kids of a Smith acquaintance or relative, performing to shouts of "pull your trousers up" until cracking and berating the crowd for not showing respect to MES, which obviously went down well.

My favourite was the young Asian DJ who seemed to have brought his whole family down with him to play at the O2 (obviously not the arena part). The league of bald-headed men were particularly pissed-up that evening. One twat came so frequently close to crashing into my partner I had to become a barrier around her up front (I'll never forget his stupid, vacant O face). The kid wasn't playing anything awful, but his set went on and on as per usual, the league were getting impatient and the atmosphere was getting unpleasant. Someone had brought a bag of frozen veg and started chucking it around, so bits of broccoli and corn cob were dotting the stage. His older brother came out at one point and made slit-your-throat gestures to the crowd, richly deserved. Eventually, the DJ set-up was wheeled off all of a sudden, the kid giving us the finger all the way until he disappeared from view. He should've been brought back in place of that cunt who did all that video bollocks, Elvis going 'werp' for half an hour shit.

[Jockice]

I saw a band called the Milltown Brothers at Sheffield University circa 1991. They were fairly ordinary indie fare but no one in the tiny audience were interested. The singer was leaping about trying to inject some energy and stood on one of the guitarist's pedals, fucking up his sound. Everyone laughed at this. Near the end the keyboard player shouted "fuck you" at the bored audience and stormed off with a couple of songs to go.

Edit: fucking hell, they're still going!

I may have been at that. I definitely saw The Milltown Brothers in Sheffield in front of a tiny audience. But I have absolutely no recollection of the events described. I did see Radiohead get not much reaction from a tiny audience at Sheffield University in the early 90s though, with Thom Yorke stomping about like a little diva before and after the set. Nobody dared go near him because he looked so damn furious.

[kalowski]

I may have been at that. I definitely saw The Milltown Brothers in Sheffield in front of a tiny audience. But I have absolutely no recollection of the events described. I did see Radiohead get not much reaction from a tiny audience at Sheffield University in the early 90s though, with Thom Yorke stomping about like a little diva before and after the set. Nobody dared go near him because he looked so damn furious.

I had joined the "Ents"' team, meaning a made a load of cheese butties for the band to eat backstage, and as a result got a free ticket.
I left the "Ents" team not long after
I had to slice the cheese with a plastic knife!

[Phoenix Lazarus]

I did see Radiohead get not much reaction from a tiny audience at Sheffield University in the early 90s though, with Thom Yorke stomping about like a little diva before and after the set. Nobody dared go near him because he looked so damn furious.

No surprises!  Creep!

[Replies From View]

You always look like you're breathing so it is very very bad acting if you ask me

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

Video unavailable message. That is a harsh reaction

In the video, heavy metal fans storm the stage to murder the nu-metal douchebags opening for their idols.

At the actual concert the Metallica fans (the ones who had paid for standing room, unlike the people who had paid for seats and fucked off to the bar/get food for the opening act) booed and threw bottles, which was really fucking disrespectful to both Linkin Park and those of us (i.e. me) who were there to see Linkin Park. Even Chester Bennington thanking Metallica for "letting" LP play at "their" show did nothing to assuage the shitheads.

[Avril Lavigne]

Janeane Garofalo was apparently very bad at Latitude festival according to my brother and seemingly pretty much everyone else who attended, so much so that she quit after a few minutes. There used to be footage available online but I can't find any now, though there are still some articles about the incident:
https://www.chortle.co.uk/news/2009/07/20/9319/garofalo_bombs_at_latitude

What I recall from the footage was that she just sounded like she was talking to a friend about incidental things that had been on her mind recently with no conclusions or punchlines.

[Small Man Big Horse]

As I've mentioned before I was one of those unfortunates that saw Sarah Silverman be (deservedly) shamed off the stage back in 2008.  Quite what anyone sees in her I didn't understand then and still don't now, and I think that show made a few people (including myself) realise they'd believed the hype way too much.  One of the worst live events I've ever experienced and I now tend to avoid anything she has any significant involvement in.

I remember reading reviews of that Silverman gig and wincing a lot, I almost bought tickets but I'm so glad I didn't as it seemed like she really was taking the piss and trying to get away with the bare minimum, and clearly wasn't aware that at the prices she was charging the audience would (understandably) expect at least 90 minutes if not two hours of strong material.

To defend her slightly though I think she's a really great stand up now, she's moved away from shock humour and has moved in to  storytelling mode, and her book The Bedwetter is a very funny read.

[Avril Lavigne]

I remember reading reviews of that Silverman gig and wincing a lot, I almost bought tickets but I'm so glad I didn't as it seemed like she really was taking the piss and trying to get away with the bare minimum, and clearly wasn't aware that at the prices she was charging the audience would (understandably) expect at least 90 minutes if not two hours of strong material.

To defend her slightly though I think she's a really great stand up now, she's moved away from shock humour and has moved in to  storytelling mode, and her book The Bedwetter is a very funny read.

I've always felt like that whole catastrophe was mostly down to bad management & publicity. There was all this press hype around her doing her first UK shows and even at the time I thought too much was being made of that, before taking into account the ridiculous ticket prices, as if she was at a major star level when she was really still a fringe comedian with a few movie and TV appearances under her belt. She wasn't at all ready for that kind of tour but the hype and cash-potential won out over common sense.

[Jockice]

I can never remember the name of the show but in the early to mid 90s there was a late night show on Channel 4 presented by Johnny Vaughan and a regular item was Collins and Maconie doing a topical news review thing while sitting on a raised platform. Vaughan would introduce them by saying how funny they were, which seemed not to be a view shared by the studio audience.

Yet both of them (and Vaughan) seem to have gone onto fairly successful careers. Maybe 'making it' really is just a matter of persistence. Because if I got that (lack of) reaction once, let alone week after week, I'd probably never leave my bedroom again.

[Shit Good Nose]

I remember reading reviews of that Silverman gig and wincing a lot, I almost bought tickets but I'm so glad I didn't as it seemed like she really was taking the piss and trying to get away with the bare minimum, and clearly wasn't aware that at the prices she was charging the audience would (understandably) expect at least 90 minutes if not two hours of strong material.

To defend her slightly though I think she's a really great stand up now, she's moved away from shock humour and has moved in to  storytelling mode, and her book The Bedwetter is a very funny read.

I've always felt like that whole catastrophe was mostly down to bad management & publicity. There was all this press hype around her doing her first UK shows and even at the time I thought too much was being made of that, before taking into account the ridiculous ticket prices, as if she was at a major star level when she was really still a fringe comedian with a few movie and TV appearances under her belt. She wasn't at all ready for that kind of tour but the hype and cash-potential won out over common sense.

Whatever circumstances can or can't be blamed, there's no getting away from the fact her material was super fucking weak, and that's coming from someone who had never heard ANY of it before.  I've seen plenty of try-hard support acts die on their arse in my time, but none of them were as bad as her.  Hell, even Lee Hurst managed one good bit.

I honestly would've been fucked off if I only paid a tenner to see that in a small club.

[non capisco]

I can never remember the name of the show but in the early to mid 90s there was a late night show on Channel 4 presented by Johnny Vaughan and a regular item was Collins and Maconie doing a topical news review thing while sitting on a raised platform. Vaughan would introduce them by saying how funny they were, which seemed not to be a view shared by the studio audience.

It was the second, studio based series of Naked City and Collins and Maconie's section was called 'The Hipster's Guide'. The first thing I thought for this thread as well, it absolutely tanked week after week.

[Avril Lavigne]

Rob Delaney on Jimmy Kimmel's late night show.
https://youtu.be/DASV-Ru6a_c

For quite a while it was impossible to find a video of it on youtube, as Delaney apparently had them all taken down. I think I originally watched it on liveleak, which is apt considering how badly he dies. I assume this one has only been allowed to stay up because the title is so flattering, albeit extremely incorrect.

I swear a huge contingent of US comics make careers out of just talking about food. I tried listening to a Jim Gaffigan set once and the entire premise seemed to be 'It's funny that I eat food'.

[GoblinAhFuckScary]

[Phoenix Lazarus]

Who/what is that!?

[Egyptian Feast]

Who/what is that!?

Ashlee Simpson in the final moments of her career.