#craftywank vs Penis Balls

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

the hellscape of that period shaped and distorted the rest of my life to date with a thankfully fading intensity. But I'd say personally that it all gave me an absolute hatred of bullying and complete instinctive support for anything approaching an underdog (thus strong attachment to left-wing politics)

Snap

[kngen]

Yeah, well, I'm not much of a fan of such humour, but enjoyed this greatly. Grimes is a professional troll, who got the shit trolled out of him and immediately went to lolsuit threats. This is a nice little cathartic win for a lot of folks, and does a great job of showing him up to be an enormous hypocrite.

He rants and raves constantly about so-called "cancel culture", then shits his drawers in rage and threatens a lolsuit when he's the subject of a bit of mild shit-posting.

Great stuff.

Also, rather wonderfully, by saying that he'll get a lawyer to 'prosecute' Penis Balls, he completely exposes the extent of his own ignorance about such things. Too many crafty wanks, not enough book learning, clearly.

EDIT: Also, Crafty Wank doesn't immediately suggest bullying to me. As a nickname, it almost conveys a certain amount of respect for his audacity. If he was called 'Desk Nonce', that might be a bit different ...

[imitationleather]

I just dunno how someone can possibly want to make a living the way Grimes does. He never gets a single moment to clock off and stop being a fucking total melt.

Even the people on his side hate him, and he must surely be aware of this.

[imitationleather]

When you think of undergraduate Grimes having his head flushed down the loo by the shocking calibre of people that must populate a Libertarian Soc it's impossible to feel anything other than deep pity and desperate sadness.

[peanutbutter]

I'd be massively surprised if Darren Grimes wasn't about as much of an awful cunt as he is now the day he started school tbh, just reminds me far far too much of kids that were horribly arrogant cunts on day one and never really changed, overly boosted ego at home or whatever. Obviously bullying him is still bad but I can fully imagine him not being super graceful on any of the occasions where his bullies took a hit of their own or being able to empathise much with any other kids who were being targeted.

[Midas]

Dear reader, I've made peace with my conflicting thoughts and made my post multiple choice. Delete as applicable. <3

• Funny


• Fatuous Twatter S4C


• Heh, get this in the "Teaching kids resilience" thread!!!


• Blah blah problematic to indulge in pleasure-seeking from blah blah childhood bullying blah blah humilate ourselves blah pseudo-intellectual blah gibberish blah blah retrospectively hold to account blah blah the regressive blah socio-political blah landscape blah he campaigns for blah blah


• It'd be funny if he tossed himself off - a bridge!!!

[Barry Admin]

The bullying didn't happen, it's a troll.

[Butchers Blind]

Everytime I see this thread title I mistake it for a Wimblewrong match.

[BeardFaceMan]

I think the main thing to take from this is that schoolyard nickname standards are slipping in this country.  How can he be Crafty Wank if he was caught doing it?

[idunnosomename]

My name is Penis Balls.

[MoreauVasz]

I am team Buelligan on this one.

I am perfectly happy thinking that Grimes is a shit and that people are behaving badly towards him. The crafty wank stuff is just silly but the whole videoing him taking a shit and putting it on the Internet? Fucking hell.

For fuck's sake get off twitter, it is messing with your moral compases.

[Mobius]

I think he's a complete fucking prick and a horrible person so I'm delighted to hear he's being bullied and hounded, and I hope more right wing people get treated similarly.

[stonkers]

The bullying didn't happen, it's a troll.

[idunnosomename]

darren has finally retweeted the DMs with Penis Balls and is claiming they are fake. also that people have been telling him to kill himself.

nobody wants you to kill yourself Darren, they just want you to stop pretending to be a political commentator on the internet off the back of vote leave and turning point money, because you're a fucking idiot and shit at it

[Barry Admin]

I am team Buelligan on this one.

I am perfectly happy thinking that Grimes is a shit and that people are behaving badly towards him. The crafty wank stuff is just silly but the whole videoing him taking a shit and putting it on the Internet? Fucking hell.

For fuck's sake get off twitter, it is messing with your moral compases.

Do you think this really happened too? (Same author/thread.)

[The Lurker]

darren has finally retweeted the DMs with Penis Balls and is claiming they are fake.

That's exactly what someone who had a crafty wank at school would say tbf

[idunnosomename]

oh i still think those dms are real

[Mister Six]

I had the hell bullied out of me at school, so I agree with Buelligan in the abstract - however in this particular case, I think it's justified to bring up this stuff on Twitter. Exposing these pompous Twitter fascists as cowering little losers does puncture the bubbles of "respectability" they inflate online, and helps defang them.

Comparisons with body shaming aren't accurate because public masturbation is a completely reasonable thing to find distasteful, unlike the shape of a person's body. I don't see this promoting or sustaining any kind of oppressive attitudes, in schools or elsewhere.

Plus, as mentioned, it looks like it's just someone trolling a troll rather than actually digging up their childhood trauma in any case.

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

I am team Buelligan on this one.

I am perfectly happy thinking that Grimes is a shit and that people are behaving badly towards him. The crafty wank stuff is just silly but the whole videoing him taking a shit and putting it on the Internet? Fucking hell.

Ah, now, this I agree with. That video shouldn't have been made or posted and nobody should go looking for it or repost it, that was and would be a fucked up thing to do.

Exposing these pompous Twitter fascists as cowering little losers does puncture the bubbles of "respectability" they inflate online, and helps defang them.

Comparisons with body shaming aren't accurate because public masturbation is a completely reasonable thing to find distasteful, unlike the shape of a person's body. I don't see this promoting or sustaining any kind of oppressive attitudes, in schools or elsewhere.

I also agree with this. Fascism, or more accurately, totalitarianism in general, can't weather mockery at all. That's why Winnie the Pooh is banned in China. Imagine being that much of a little fucking child, being so enraged by a comparison with a cartoon bear that you ban all mention of him from your country.

[Barry Admin]

oh i still think those dms are real

That's the only bit that strikes me as potentially genuine, yeah.

There are messages & tweets that purport to be authored and sent by me. They are fake. There are also a whole load of threats of violence. Guess what?  @Twitter reckons they're unable to spot any issue with any of this. It's one rule for the Left and quite another for all others.


The number of messages I've had over the past 24 hours advocating that I kill myself, from the same lot that tweet blue hearts or messages about the need to 'be kind', is frankly staggering. I might be many things, but I know I'd never sink anywhere near as low as these people.



Hi Simon, you're sharing fake messages and doing so gleefully, even reposting them in attempt to bully someone (I assume) you disagree with politically.

I was never called '#craftywank' at school, sadly, just 'poof', 'faggot' and beaten for being 'gay'. Hope that clears that up.

Just fuck off you little bollocks. As if a) he actually got people seriously telling him to kill himself and b) Twitter gives a fuck about the political orientation of complaints like these, which will be handled by AI and farmed out anyway. Tosser.

See what I mean about them always retreating to the "be kind" position? You have to give them a bit of shit back and stand up to their nonsense, you can't just "be kind" all the time and presume cunts are gonna want to follow that example, as laid out by Machiavelli.[NB]In a broad sense anyway; I'm not suggesting you should get as down and dirty as he advocated for. :-)[/NB] Rip the piss out of them and they quickly display their absolutely massive hypocrisy.

[jobotic]

See this is who we're all feeling sorry for - a man who pretends that his political opponents have been telling him to kill himself. A fucking cunt.

[Mr Banlon]

Would not surprise me if all this was made up by Grimes himself. The crafty wanker.

[mothman]

There's a line from Red Dragon that always occurs to me at times like this. It's something like:

My heart bleeds for him, as a child. Someone took a kid and manufactured a monster. At the same time, as an adult, he's irredeemable [...] As an adult, someone should blow the sick fuck out of his socks.

(that's the version from Manhunter, all I could dig up in a hurry)

Grimes. This is someone who has chosen, as an adult, to bully others. To punch down, always. To whip up hate against the dispossessed and the unfortunate. It may not be true. But what of it? It's not like he's ever been troubled by facts or truth or honesty.

Like quite a few others here, I was bullied. Relentlessly, remorselessly. Most of it I've chosen to forget. But it haunts me to this day. You'll note however I've not become a hate-spewing right-wing tosspot.

So, fuck him. Let #craftywank live forever associated with him. Let it come up in searches for his name, like what happens if you Google "Santorum."

[RicoMNKN]

I don't think you have to worry to much about any abuse sent to a "freedom of speech" edgelord. It's what they claim to want. Perhaps call him Crafty Wank with a Stephen Fry meme about offence pinned to it.

[Old Thrashbarg]

Thay story about #craftywank isn't true, but I feel that what it tells us about #craftywank is true.

[Barry Admin]

Christ, even Carole Cadwalladr has tweeted it out, she loves it!

https://mobile.twitter.com/carolecadwalla/status/1415408119203631104

Oh. You don't know about #craftywank?!? ENJOY

[Thursday]

Yeah, I'm not against fucking with Darren Grimes, but it's a bit concerning how easily people actually believe this isn't it?

[idunnosomename]

Carole Cadwalladr pushed that Brexit was done by Russian troll farms for uh, some reason. rather than, you know, a linking of interests between Eurosceptic politicians and plutocrat cunts with their massive print media arm in aid of massive deregulation of laissez-faire capitalism.

[Barry Admin]

Yeah, I'm not against fucking with Darren Grimes, but it's a bit concerning how easily people actually believe this isn't it?

Kind of, but it's just Poe's Law in a sense.

That's one of the reasons I use smilies and stuff more frequently now - soften the text a bit, and remove some of the uncertainty.

[Kankurette]

I was bullied so badly from age 13 to 15 that it permanently affected my ability to form friendships with other people. Somehow I didn't decide to make the world worse for everyone except me and my fascist cronies.

Everybody who had a shit childhood or adolescence eventually becomes an adult and has to decide whether to lie around blaming their lousy life choices on people calling them Craftywank or Daddy not reading them bedtime stories or the other girls making you feel like you were stupid and annoying and inflicting your horrible self on everyone around you, or to take control and own what they do.

Same. I was bullied very badly at school and twats like Grimes were awful to me because I wasn't their idea of what a girl should be. I'm extremely paranoid because of it. I was the subject of lots of oh so heelarious banter about sausages, because when I was asked if I liked sausages I took it literally and didn't realise they meant 'wanking yourself off with a frozen sausage', as opposed to eating one. I didn't turn into a right-wing grifting cunt. Grimes is no better than the kids who bullied him.

Also, jerking off in class is fucking gross. It's sex pest behaviour.

It's being adopted not for the face value purpose but in efforts to expose how Grimes can't live to the standards he sets for others, how the mean society he desires can hurt him too.

Amazing if you can't see that.

This.