Author Topic: Adrian Chiles  (Read 2478 times)

TrenterPercenter

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Adrian Chiles
« on: July 21, 2021, 05:52:47 PM »
What is the craic with this lad then eh?

Constantly writing shite for the Guardian; and it's weird shite too; like he's talking to himself in the mirror and writing it all down for us to experience.  It's tragic; he has morphed into a real life Grandpa Simpson with man tits.  I really thought he was married to the Editor of the Guardian for some reason, and his little column was Viner's way of giving him something to do, but I've got this wrong he used to be married to a BBC big wig yet is single at the moment (after dating Catherine Tate - who knew!).  Anyway I appreciate he has got ADD so perhaps he has been getting on the phetamines which is making him write stuff like this....











I dunno a part of me likes the whole "fuck it, speak your brains" attitude, but he can barely squirt out a couple of paragraphs before his mind fart ends; is it meant to be joke? I'm not so sure.  Does anyone know what it all about are they chronicling his breakdown for scientific purposes or do they honestly think we need to hear his ideas on how to pick up dogshit (this isn't a joke he has an article on this also).

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #1 on: July 21, 2021, 05:54:51 PM »
"Fear of being boring"

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #2 on: July 21, 2021, 05:55:28 PM »

Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #3 on: July 21, 2021, 05:57:58 PM »
Each one sounds like a segment in This Time With Alan Partridge

bgmnts

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #4 on: July 21, 2021, 05:58:35 PM »
In regards to clubbing he isn't wrong. I suppose a broken clock is right twice a day.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #5 on: July 21, 2021, 05:58:48 PM »
Researching who he was married too I saw an article about how he still travels to his parents house weekly to get his washing done.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #6 on: July 21, 2021, 06:03:22 PM »
Each one sounds like a segment in This Time With Alan Partridge

He has an article in which he references Alan Partridge whilst writing about himself in an incredibly Partridge manner.
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2021/apr/08/there-are-meant-to-be-three-phases-of-tv-celebrity-but-ive-discovered-a-fourth

Quote
Now, though, rather like Spinal Tap’s amps going up to 11 instead of just 10, I’ve discovered a fourth phase, which I’ve just entered. I have a part in a sitcom in which I play myself as presenter of a breakfast television show. I write this on location, sitting in a makeshift dressing room having just had my makeup done by a nice woman who happened to have made me up back in the day, when I was a real breakfast television presenter. Outside I can see the small van they have given me to drive. On the side it says: “Wake Up with Adrian Chiles.” I might be wrong, but even for Alan Partridge I don’t believe it quite came to this. Naturally I’m fantasising that someone senior on the crew is going to look up from a monitor and say: “Eh, what have we here, then? This lad could go far.”

No sign of this so far, I’m afraid, and I’m freezing to death. I can’t say I’m not enjoying it, though. One of the extras has just spent three weeks saying nothing on the set of Batman, the costume woman’s from Venezuela and the stunt bloke once pole-vaulted for Great Britain. All interesting chats – a change is a good as a rest.

PlanktonSideburns

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #7 on: July 21, 2021, 06:04:33 PM »
Is he just an unusual nice man, and people have been like, yea let him write for the guardian, he's nice

Cuellar

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #8 on: July 21, 2021, 06:06:50 PM »
I thought the story was he was going out with Viner

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #9 on: July 21, 2021, 06:12:21 PM »
Is he just an unusual nice man, and people have been like, yea let him write for the guardian, he's nice

He isn't unusual though; he is very usual.  Its sound like the overheard mumblings from your neighbours shed before his wife starts shouting at him from the house about when he wants his Bovril.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #10 on: July 21, 2021, 06:14:16 PM »
I thought the story was he was going out with Viner

Yes just checked again and he is; so my "occupy him" before he buys another train set theory is still in play.

Zetetic

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #11 on: July 21, 2021, 06:14:55 PM »
Would happily chuck Adrian and Aditya a couple of dollars a month if they fucked off the G and got on Patreon or OnlyFans.

Zetetic

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #12 on: July 21, 2021, 06:15:47 PM »
He serves the same purpose of offering succour to the talentless, like myself, as Sam Wollaston did only without wasting anyone's time to nearly the same extent.

PlanktonSideburns

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #13 on: July 21, 2021, 06:21:59 PM »
He isn't unusual though; he is very usual.  Its sound like the overheard mumblings from your neighbours shed before his wife starts shouting at him from the house about when he wants his Bovril.

God point

My original Statment, but with this addendum

Gurke and Hare

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #14 on: July 21, 2021, 06:25:15 PM »
Nothing wrong with buying train sets.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #15 on: July 21, 2021, 06:35:07 PM »
Would happily chuck Adrian and Aditya a couple of dollars a month if they fucked off the G and got on Patreon or OnlyFans.

"Hi it's me, Adrain Chiles, subscribe to my Onlyfans and watch me eat some cheese and crackers, slowly. Ever wondered what my favourite crackers for cheese are? Become a premium subscriber and I'll tell you not only about the crackers but the boxes they come in, rating motifs, packaging material quality and 'openupability'.  Need to know what I'm up to? Keep up to date on my movements with a Chiles chat message; I'll let you know when I'm walking the dog with a "just walking the dog" text.  Get my thoughts on how difficult it is nowadays to buy decent trainers for size 8 and a half feet and I've also got some tips on how to appropriately use talcum powder for those of you feeling more adventurous"

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #16 on: July 21, 2021, 06:36:50 PM »
Pub bore stops drinking so they give him a column.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #17 on: July 21, 2021, 06:37:07 PM »
Nothing wrong with buying train sets.

And people wonder why no Hornby enthusiasts post on here.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #18 on: July 21, 2021, 06:38:09 PM »
Nothing wrong with buying train sets.

Alright Pete Waterman.

Zetetic

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #19 on: July 21, 2021, 06:44:05 PM »
"Hi it's me, Adrain Chiles, subscribe to my Onlyfans and watch me eat some cheese and crackers, slowly. Ever wondered what my favourite crackers for cheese are? Become a premium subscriber and I'll tell you not only about the crackers but the boxes they come in, rating motifs, packaging material quality and 'openupability'.  Need to know what I'm up to? Keep up to date on my movements with a Chiles chat message; I'll let you know when I'm walking the dog with a "just walking the dog" text.  Get my thoughts on how difficult it is nowadays to buy decent trainers for size 8 and a half feet and I've also got some tips on how to appropriately use talcum powder for those of you feeling more adventurous"

Yes.

Paul Calf

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #20 on: July 21, 2021, 06:46:25 PM »

pigamus

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #21 on: July 21, 2021, 06:47:22 PM »
At some point ITV decided he was a star, which was and remains very odd

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #22 on: July 21, 2021, 06:48:25 PM »
At some point ITV decided he was a star, which was and remains very odd

He was basically fine when he was not that accessible and on Working Lunch, the BBC should've never promoted him beyond that.

Zetetic

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #23 on: July 21, 2021, 06:49:04 PM »
That brings back memories.

Very, very, very, very depressed teenaged memories.

In retrospect, should've gotten into self-injury sooner.

Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #24 on: July 21, 2021, 06:49:48 PM »
I can only imagine he made a deal with the devil to be the highest paid man in light entertainment, jet about to host the football and have a go on Catherine Tate. Now with the spoils enjoyed, he is cursed to write about quiche and toenails for the rest of eternity.

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #25 on: July 21, 2021, 06:51:42 PM »
This bit of wiki trivia tickled me:
Quote
A feature of his presentations is his Birmingham accent. He also speaks Croatian, despite having a self-confessed imperfect understanding of the language's verbs, declensions, and cases.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #26 on: July 21, 2021, 07:10:49 PM »
"£50 a month will get you unlimited access to the Chiles quiche hotline; call anytime to find out what quiches I've eaten over the years and what flavour I might consider trying at some point that's not Cheese and Onion.  Looking for something a bit more controversial? Have your own custom made "quiche discussion" video in which I address you POV style by name as we vigorusly debate whether quiches should be heated or left cold. Have you ever made a quiche? Sounds like fun, I haven't and wouldn't be able to comment on this but I have got a list of my top 5 supermarket quiches for my super fans accounts."

mothman

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #27 on: July 21, 2021, 07:11:09 PM »
I can only imagine he made a deal with the devil to be the highest paid man in light entertainment, jet about to host the football and have a go on Catherine Tate. Now with the spoils enjoyed, he is cursed to write about quiche and toenails for the rest of eternity.

There’s a list to be compiled of those who made their names in light entertainment at the BBC but who then basically fucked their careers by being tempted over to ITV. Chiles, obviously. Des Lynam…

Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #28 on: July 21, 2021, 07:28:28 PM »
I read every single one of those headlines...in the style of Kilroy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yF6cBf133rA

Sebastian Cobb

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Re: Adrian Chiles
« Reply #29 on: July 21, 2021, 07:31:03 PM »
There’s a list to be compiled of those who made their names in light entertainment at the BBC but who then basically fucked their careers by being tempted over to ITV. Chiles, obviously. Des Lynam…

Pity Jonathan Ross bucked the trend isn't it?

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