Relaxation without drink

[bgmnts]

Does anyone know how to relax and be more confident and less anxious in social situations without alcohol? Since taking sertraline and shit I've developed acid reflux recently and so alcohol is a no no and if I'm ever in a social situation again I would probably come across as anxious and nervous and unapproachable despite not feeling that way consciously.

So is there a drink or a technique that has the same effect as booze?

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

Temazepam?

[TrenterPercenter]

Mindfullness can be good for anxiety - need to practice it a bit though in advance.  Have you looked into getting some CBT I know long waiting list but might be worth getting on that list sooner rather than later; anxiety is treatable.

You might also want to check out this forum which has really helpful people on it helping each other our with all aspects of anxiety (including health anxiety which I've seen a few people on here have mentioned having problems).

https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?28-Social-Anxiety
https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/forum.php

All the best bgmnts

[peanutbutter]

These are all quite generic:
- becoming the person who does most of the organising so you can ensure social situations occur in better places and at times you find easier to deal with
- replacing actual social situations with having regular activities you do with people. Informaly things like hiking, cycling, I gather climbing is increasingly becoming an option here too; more formally joining some clubs
- other drugs


For me personally I reckon the real solution is either just getting the adhd diagnosis so I can justify drugs, and/or really good CBT to rewire my brain a bit. I'm quite okay in one-on-one circumstances though so I tend to only do the first one of those things at the cost of having no friend groups (instead a whole load of individual friendships that are way more work to maintain)

[Rizla]

[TrenterPercenter]

Worth saying anxiety is normal; everyone has a certain level of anxiety and these levels will change through the day.  Anxiety is caused by your nervous system misinterpreting threat.  You know all this but here is the thing; because we are all victim to this system it is in our interests and part of our duty to be understanding of others struggling with things.   So it's fine to be anxious and it's ok to let people know if you are feeling that way - it's isn't you, it is something that is happening to you and anyone worth being around should be able to empathise, understand and help you feel safe.

[purlieu]

Since taking sertraline and shit I've developed acid reflux recently

Worth talking to your doctors about changing your SSRI if there are side effects like this. Obviously don't know your history etc. but if it's the first you've been on and it's causing you other health problems then it might be worth looking at something else. Fluoxetine is exceptionally good for anxiety in my experience, I was really laid back and easy going when I was on it.

[Cloud]

Don't want to get the site into trouble by spelling it out, but over the years I've seen quite a few with (over-)anxiety issues saying that a particular plant helps them out.  Arguably safer than alcohol, too.

[Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse]

Have you looked into getting some CBT

How will cock and ball torture etc. etc. OH HAHA I THOUGHT YOU MEANT SOMETHING SEXUAL

[TrenterPercenter]

Don't want to get the site into trouble by spelling it out, but over the years I've seen quite a few with (over-)anxiety issues saying that a particular plant helps them out.  Arguably safer than alcohol, too.

Exact opposite for me and a lot of people; makes me intensely anxious and paranoid.

[Jasha]

You'll never feel more at peace than immediately after cracking the porcelain on boxing Day

[Chollis]

Get on the amphetamines?

[Zetetic]

Don't want to get the site into trouble by spelling it out, but over the years I've seen quite a few with (over-)anxiety issues saying that a particular plant helps them out.

Given the rest of the site, I dread to think what this "plant" is. Some sort of racism or violent sexual crime?

[purlieu]

Don't want to get the site into trouble by spelling it out, but over the years I've seen quite a few with (over-)anxiety issues saying that a particular plant helps them out.  Arguably safer than alcohol, too.

One of the biggest anxiety triggers for me, behind caffeine. Sadly can't touch the stuff anymore.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Given the rest of the site, I dread to think what this "plant" is. Some sort of racism or violent sexual crime?

Obviously means mucking around with machinery.

[poo]

Last thing I would do to anyone with anxiety is hand them a spliff

[pancreas]

I have heard

Pregabalin
Kratom

[Huxleys Babkins]

Given the rest of the site, I dread to think what this "plant" is. Some sort of racism or violent sexual crime?

Paedoeony

[imitationleather]

Get on absolutely hero doses of xanax ASAP.

This is good advice, trust me.

[Shoulders?-Stomach!]

Engage in some activities that don't really involve intoxicants on any level above, say, popcorn and fizzy drinks- anxiety inducing though doing so may still be.

Try to make connections and bonds with people without the aid of crutches. There is nothing more relaxing than feeling confident and secure among friends, liked, trusted, valued. That confidence comes from having recent learned knowledge of trying something new or different and succeeding. You remove the things to feel anxious about by proving to yourself they were not as formidable or threatening as you feared. This lowers the bar for your whatever comes next. Also important to be looking for small opportunities to do this.

You have to be prepared to fail and let that failure wash over you and try again. Most of the time I find people are receptive, patient, eager to interact with others, but bad at breaking the ice (myself included).

Following this doesn't mean you will suddenly be fixed and won't ever feel like that again. For example, I have recently felt really uncomfortable and like a spare part at an event where I didn't know anyone, and struggled to get any conversation going. It happened that I was the only one there not working in that sector and perhaps a combination of my failure to try and a few people just moving on to network with more useful people (Alcohol didn't help then either, it was just something to hold to pretend I wasn't just standing alone for absolutely no reason)

I suppose what I'm getting at is that in order to feel less anxious, build up some confidence and self-assurance through gradual steps and lived experience of recent success and achievements.

It's natural to respond to anxiety and low confidence by having a damage limitation mentality where your own negative view of yourself becomes a defensive shield, unfortunately it is also a cocoon people rot inside.

If you can make some progress by confronting the hard road then you will naturally find less reliance on booze and dregs.

[idunnosomename]

Big ol wank

[Twit 2]

speed bomb

[Janie Jones]

Get on absolutely hero doses of xanax ASAP.

This is good advice, trust me.

Ruby Wax gave the same advice in a recent interview. Unfortunately you cannot obtain this legally in the UK without paying for a private prescription.

[Zetetic]

Plenty of other near-functionally-equivalent benzos, however, where functional-equivalence includes "extremely addictive, probably particularly if regularly taken in specific contexts".

A light dose of any opioid will tend to be pretty relaxing as well, and you can make those yourself in a matter of seconds. But it's also not very sustainable as an approach to managing social anxiety, unfortunately.

[purlieu]

Yeah, I've been prescribed diazepam for anxiety in the past and it definitely helps short term, although your body builds up a tolerance to it very quickly. The last couple of times I took it I ended up with horrible depressive comedowns afterwards, though, so I'm not going near the stuff again.

[Dex Sawash]

Maybe wear a Big Bird costume and see if that helps

[imitationleather]

Maybe wear a Big Bird costume and see if that helps

Gonna give this a go myself actually. Nice one.

[robhug]

Given the rest of the site, I dread to think what this "plant" is. Some sort of racism or violent sexual crime?

Its obviously a reference to aged brummie songsmith Robert

[thenoise]

I echo advice to do non drinky things and hobbies. Sitting in a pub around people getting pissed while you drink orange juice is not a sustainable solution.

Becoming one of those healthy people seems to be a good way to meet people who don't want to drag you to the pub once a week. Probably meet them at running clubs or smoothie bars or something. No idea.

[idunnosomename]

Squeeze my lemon