Author Topic: The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW: HAHALLOWEEN III: Shriekin’ of the Witch  (Read 30275 times)

Post #2, by Shit Good Nose, in the thread, "Tell me a bit about yourself?"

They beheaded the thread title.

(see football thread for context)

GoblinAhFuckScary

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'first Australian to go to space..... and back'

Some pretty sinister implications in that statement

See thread title for context.
Lisa Stansfield leaves the thread disappointed

They only want to help you Po-land

So stupid. So funny.


Blue Jam

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...a striking visual contrast to Jurgen, whose eyebrows not only lack religious significance but aren't eyebrows at all...

Paul Hollywood a vegan hater, Paul Hollywood full to the brim with dead cow, the personification of colon cancer and a ferociously shitless man. Astonishing that a man who's wallpapered himself brown in presumable solidarity with our diminishing hardwood forests would fly into a frothing banshee rage the minute the blood round his lips starts to dry. Let's hope Freya didn't bother picking floor lint off of her floor crackers, she's a beacon, would love to link hands in a daisy chain and have her guide us to a new era of peace and prosperity, want her to dress me in King of Hearts livery and place me in prime plush position atop an ornate toybox.

Maggie flubs the sticky toffee puddings, extraordinary, lowest of the low. Menstruation sin-cakes cum bin-cakes from the menopause set, freud rides again. Bleak future ahead for her, she's off the village fete circuit for sure, good chance even the lonely sorcerer who animated her will turn her back into a bogbrush.

Jesus wept... the only way Pijlstaart's Bake-Off recaps could be any better would be if Andrew was allowed to come back for every single series.

Better Midlands

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Jesus wept... the only way Pijlstaart's Bake-Off recaps could be any better would be if Andrew was allowed to come back for every single series.

a ferociously shitless man

Menstruation sin-cakes cum bin-cakes from the menopause set.

Amazing.


Glebe

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Norton Canes

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just heard that his last words were 'i bet you're loving this on the cookdandbombd forum'

Also I find it really, really difficult to piss in sight of people

Not sorted for ease of whizz.

Anti-vaxxers aleady highlighting dangers of being triple jabbed at walk-ins..

Pink Gregory

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COCK SPUNK.

presented without context

Glebe

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Hehe, cheers PG. Incredibly childish but it got a lol so job done!

Why would you be upset.  You don't know him.  Probably worth storing a bit of empathy for his family that did and might not have agreed with his politics.

And had to live with him, let's be fair, it can't all have been beer and skittles with a cunt like that.  No offence.

Particularly liked the thread title change to 'every cloud'.

https://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php/topic,90085.msg4717740.html#msg4717740

touchingcloth

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Particularly liked the thread title change

Buellers is a great one for that. A CaB Easter egg.

pigamus

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I met Sir David Amess at a charity do once. He was extremely down to earth, and then a constituent ran in and stabbed him to death.

Cerys

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In the same thread, Twit 2's post simply reading -

Quote
MAN

Johnny Foreigner

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Yes, what you’re saying there, au fond, is that you have to hand it to the stabber, generally speaking at the end of the day.

I love this kind of creative use of the plethora of clichés with which the English language abounds.

madhair60

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I will admit I'm as partial to gallows humour as anyone, but knowing this really changes everything, it's horrible to think that his final moments were full of terror.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

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Really taken aback by some of the comments in this thread. I stopped visiting politics threads, and indeed even following political news in the main, just because everything is now so divisive. This sort of tragic happening is the logical endpoint of the discourse of division. It's nothing but a terrible, unfair tragedy. Please, please, please try to remember that this poor man - a family man, let's not forget - has lost his life. Whatever your politics, I think you can agree that a man getting stabbed to death is a bad thing. And if not, I despair, I truly do. I only hope that this poor, poor man can't read this thread from where he is now (in hell)
the subtlety
it's sublime

pigamus

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I must admit he absolutely got me with that, and Lemon Drizzle remains got and probably will forevermore

canadagoose

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For some reason, this imagined title of Tony Gibber's TOTP theme "Now Get Out of That" gave me the giggles.

'Now Put Up With This' or whatever it's called

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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(in hell)

Made me laugh, but nothing concerning people being in hell beats cunt Alex Jones declaring John McCain is in hell.

pigamus

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Monday you can fall apart
Tuesday, Wednesday, break my heart
Thursday doesn't even start
It's Friday, I've been stabbed


Captain Z

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Jollity

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Not with that attitude he isn't!

I know enough old man pubs in the Holloway area, one day he'll strut his sexy socialist stuff into one of them and I'll snare the bearded beddable beast. I'm a leftist lothario and he's my Trotskyite target. Forget your allotment, Corbo, check out this mighty marrow. Is that a hardback copy of The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

Twit 2

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if the coffee thing isnt just especially for the trailer I will powerfuck my dads arse

FerriswheelBueller

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Gary Linekar and Willie Thorne touch on this in their straight-to-video feature 'Best of Friends'. Its the only point where the two best of friends disagree.

You can guess which side Thorne is going to be on when you see that he has framed photographs of the blasts from Hiroshima and Nagasaki in his snooker room at home (its also revealed that he wanted his snooker nickname to be 'The T-Bomb' instead of 'Mr Maximum' but Barry Hearn nixed it).

Oddly, there are two parallel horizontal lines to the left of the images. The camera then zooms out revealing more framed posters and symbols and we realise that we are looking at a pictorial equation: 'Map of Japanese advances as of 1942' + 'shot of Alec Guiness being beaten from Bridge on The River Kwai' + 'photo of Pearl Harbour bombing' = Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Thorne describes the montage as 'twelve foot of crime and fair punishment'.

Linekar is not a fan and puts the case that "two wrongs don't make a right". Thorne then argues that "its not two wrongs, Gary. It was more like 20 million from the Japs side." He goes on to describe how a land invasion of Japan would have seen British forces "butchered" and "taken prisoner and forced to build first rate infrastructure projects for the Japs war effort". Linekar is diplomatic but sceptical and puts the case of the human cost of the bombings with often graphic descriptions while Thorne racks up a half century break, scoffing and rolling his eyes at Linekar's argument.

It's clear Linekar is not breaking through until he stops the break stone dead with words which are now quoted at the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Park. "Willie, what if it had happened in Leicester?"

Thorne stops and the camera zooms into his face, he doesn't say a word for the next 83 seconds before we cut to a scene of Linekar and Thorne at a barbeque with their families.

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