Author Topic: The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW: HAHALLOWEEN III: Shriekin’ of the Witch  (Read 30333 times)

The Mollusk

  • I’m gonna have another Boost, John!
*pretends to have not been trying to think of a madhair-level thread title from the moment I woke up today*

Fuck it, post lol

Bill Wyman chat from the Rolling Stones thread

Apparently he poured almost his entire fortune in to developing a concept detector that could find hymens.

The Wyman Hymen Find Em™


  • Jess Phillips

That this appears to have actually come from the phrase ‘batting for Britain’ makes me want to locate a light fitting so I can swing from it.

Dex Sawash

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My favourite bit was when he drove the white lotus into the sea and it turned into a submarine.

Fambo Number Mive

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Having a short break in Shropshire so I was wandering around Ludlow today. They have blue plaques up everywhere but it’s mostly just ones from the local council explaining local town history. Dunno what the blue plaque society make of that, but more fool them if they haven’t trademarked it.

Did see Alastair McGowen in the flesh as well, but I don’t think that counts as he is neither a round blue plaque or able to do a passable impression of one.

Your second paragraph made me laugh as I imagined a blue plague with Alistair McGowen's face.

i like the idea of a blue plague. everyone catches a disease that make them do rude things

Echo Valley 2-6809

  • Part of no circle
^ From the same thread

There's one in East Dulwich on the road Bon Scott was found dead in a car but it doesn't look official. It says 'Bon Scott 1946-1980 Lead singer and lyricist for AC DC Never Forgotten. Nev'. The official ones don't usually have a bloke called Nev signing off at the end, I don't think. Unless they accidentally started writing 'Never Forgotten' again.

Also it says AC DC, not AC/DC. A pedant's nightmare, walking past that every day. Sort it out, Nev.


  • CaB rear of the year 2020
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  • Take it easy, but take it.
    • I am antsy for baseball in the off-season.
Posting in here so I get my regular CaB highlights.

Barry Admin

  • Fuck your shit tea
how do we patrol intimacy like a Brazilian death squad then what colors the transit van going to be

That's very good. Does The Spectator take pitches?


  • Kirkladn has a small penis
Simple, bindun a hundred times but it made me laugh and I want mah CaB funny updates:

I'd like to have a pointless argument please.

No you wouldn't!

I hope Ian Botham wakes up one day and his knob and balls are made of beef.


  • crazy bit of business
if this is good I will fuck my father, this is how confident I am of it being really good

The Rolling Stones thread has now become a Charlie Watts tribute thread, including this gem:
Hey, you, get off a my shroud.


  • Jess Phillips

The year is 2017. The location is an exposed clough.
Your groundskeeper is being wassailed for a successful year of ritual grouse slaughter and drainage projects.

Out of the mist runs a poor man, ravaged and bereft....

Between sobs and bodily voids you hear his story. "Drug-gaped and dunted, gobbed on and bunted, belted, cunted, snotwrung and shunted"

You are 'Uncle Festa'. You must solve the Sex Crime that has occurred on your land.

£235 pp
Groups of 6-18 welcome
Meals not included
Accommodation not included
Heating not included
Water not included
Basic shelter not included
Safety not included

I wouldn't stop there, there's a temporal and biological world of fuckdown.

- Roundness of the face
- Itchy lungs
- Jowl redaction
- Peppered alveoli
- Cobbler's Stoop
- Delusions of grandeur
- Henged gait
- Misshapen grogans
- Mingey countenance (not Mangey; see below)
- Zimmerman's Faucet
- Mange of the regions
- Excessive slurping of soup
- Despair and paranoia
- Suicidal thoughts
- Applications for membership of local Freemasons lodge
- Bollock hardness
- Bollock softness
- Excessively middling or mid-par bollock texture
- Headbutting walls and doors
- Monomania and transphobia
- Permanent loss of family and career
- Even pet hates you
- Penury Lice
- Fingal's Leer

xxxx xxx x xxx

  • Can we have a quick burn, sir?
“Reminds me I must pop in for some button mushrooms” by Shiftwork 2 in the Nirvana Baby Cock thread.[1]
 1. How the hell do you do cross-thread quoting?


  • I wasn't supposed to be around this long, so…
How the hell do you do cross-thread quoting?
Hit quote in Thread A. Copy. Hit reply in Thread B. Paste.

xxxx xxx x xxx

  • Can we have a quick burn, sir?
Ah, thanks.

Replies From View

  • Rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant.
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  • Gargoyles have milk bags.
Print cunt.  Goto 10

Sebastian Cobb

  • bad opinion haver
i like the idea of a blue plague. everyone catches a disease that make them do rude things

that's just david cronenberg's shivers there mate.

Dex Sawash

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Nuance is a furry animal that runs around in the back garden at night for you, isn't it?


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Also laughed @ th@


  • Lipsmackin' thirstquenchin' acetastin' motivatin'
Nuance is a furry animal that runs around in the back garden at night for you, isn't it?

I didn't get it...

Dex Sawash

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  • Aceveda's one-man campaign bankroll
I think they mean Andy Hamilton

Butchers Blind

  • Who blons a dumb de now?
I remember when the Mr porkys logo was a greasy, naked James corden who was being sodomised with a granny Smith apple by an angry butcher. Corden is crying.


  • The islets of Langerhans are the very best islets
I didn't get it...

I believe he is saying Crisps has very little experience of nuance, beyond being dimly aware of its existence.