Main Menu

Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 29, 2024, 02:21:09 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Hair cu(n)ts

Started by Shit Good Nose, August 31, 2021, 03:35:36 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Shit Good Nose

A new barbers has opened on our high street today.  We have a very bustling and popular high street with a lot of businesses that have been around for years and have weathered the covid storm quite well.  BUT we already have three barbers (all within a few minutes' walk of each other), two ladies salons and two beauty salons that also do hair.  So either these new guys are delusional or I'm massively out of touch with demand for hair cuts.

Anyway, the main reason I'm posting this thread is because this new one has adopted the Turkish barber style of marketing, i.e. photos of all the different cuts they can do plastered on the inside of the windows.  The only problem is that this new barbers only appear to be offering one single cut (the one with the very close cut sides and quite a lot left on top - a sort-of stepped down pompadour I guess [although I'm sure it has a proper name of its own]) and all the photos they've put up have males of different ages and races ALL sporting exactly the same cut.  So rather than them advertising their ability to do any hairstyle you want, they're advertising their ability to do one single hairstyle but it doesn't matter how old you are or what type of hair you have, you can still have the stepped down pompadour.

I'm sure it isn't actually the ONLY cut they do, but it just seemed like a really odd marketing choice, especially given the already established competition in the almost immediate vicinity.  Weird.

Sebastian Cobb

Do people ever use those photos? I figured it's just a load of tat they stick up to make it unmistakably a barbers.

Hat FM

can bald men get this cut if they go in? just asking for a forum.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: Hat FM on August 31, 2021, 03:58:21 PM
can bald men get this cut if they go in? just asking for a forum.

Yes but it's probably better to wait until the afternoon rather than going first thing.

Shit Good Nose

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on August 31, 2021, 03:59:00 PM
Yes but it's probably better to wait until the afternoon rather than going first thing.

Nope, it's an all dayer.  They just use shit in the morning, squeezed out of a piping bag.

The Mollusk

All Turkish men have exactly the same haircut so that is all they'll do. In my less affluent years I frequented the Turkish barber because it's half the price of any more upmarket place and even though I asked for certain cuts or styles they always inevitably ended up looking strikingly similar to the pictures in the window. Even when they ask if I want gel putting in and I told them no they still did it.

It is worth going in at least once and getting them to do the thing where they whack your ear with a flaming lump of matter and singe off all the little hairs though.

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: The Mollusk on August 31, 2021, 04:26:07 PM
It is worth going in at least once and getting them to do the thing where they whack your ear with a flaming lump of matter and singe off all the little hairs though.

If you think that one's unpleasant don't get the 'nose hair wax'.

ProvanFan

I like the window photos of this one on Sauchiehall Street


The Mollusk

Quote from: Sebastian Cobb on August 31, 2021, 04:34:23 PM
If you think that one's unpleasant don't get the 'nose hair wax'.

I've got enough of that stuff already without them shoving more in!

seepage

Quote from: ProvanFan on August 31, 2021, 05:02:36 PM
I like the window photos of this one on Sauchiehall Street



What are they doing to Limmy?

Butchers Blind

Will only use a barber where they're wearing a barbers uniform attributed to the shop. Most of those £12 barbers are dressed like they come in off the street so not sure how qualified they are.

Dr Trouser

Turkish barbers don't actually make money cutting hair, they're notorious fronts for anything goes sex dens. Be really careful when picking your style from the pictures as it's a code.

Sebastian Cobb

Just remembered going to a Turkish place to get a cutthroat shave and the bloke didn't really say anything other than when he paused mid-shave to opine 'you are very bony my friend' in a slightly ominous fashion.

Elderly Sumo Prophecy

Quote from: Shit Good Nose on August 31, 2021, 03:35:36 PM
The only problem is that this new barbers only appear to be offering one single cut (the one with the very close cut sides and quite a lot left on top - a sort-of stepped down pompadour I guess [although I'm sure it has a proper name of its own])

The Iced Gem, also known colloquially as the "Shitcunt".

PlanktonSideburns

Love a Turkish style haircut. Savage treatment, no choice in how it's going to be, random stuff put in your hair, and booted into the street. Used to love getting one just before playing a gig to make me feel extra sharp

non capisco

I went into a barbers in Central London I haven't been to in about a year today and they must be absolutely on their arse because they reacted like I dunno Han Solo himself had walked in. 'ROOOOOOSSSSSSSS! SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN ROSS! ONE OF THE GIRLS SAID THEY SAW YOU YESTERDAY WITH TOO LONG HAIR THEY SAID HE IS A CUSTOMER I SAY WHAT HE LOOK LIKE SHE SAY BLONDE HAIR BLUE EYES I SAID IT MUST BE ROOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSS! I KNEW YOU WOULD BE COMING, ROOOOOOOOSSSSSS! SIT DOWN, ROSS! REMEMBER THE TIME YOU LEFT YOUR JACKET AND HAD TO COME BACK FOR IT, ROSS?[nb]nope[/nb]' Do you know what, I liked it. I had no idea this guy even knew my name. (It is Ross.)

I saw the guy who plays Chabuddy from People Just Do Nothing walking about the other week and a load of kids were shouting "Yo, Chabuddy! Chabuddy! Where's your peanut dust?" at him and I thought "Would I like being mildly famous or would I find it a galactic sized pain in the anus? That looks shit, all kids shouting at you." Turns out I'm a raving egomaniac and I'd probably wallow in it all like a shallow little worm.