Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 29, 2024, 02:02:52 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Celebrity encounters

Started by Bigfella, August 31, 2021, 03:54:44 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Janie Jones

I see a lot of Arsenal and Spurs footballers locally, I don't recognise them as individuals but you can always spot them because of the other-worldly level of fitness, nutrition and grooming they display and their expensive clothes. Then you notice everyone else looking and then you see the £400K car parked on double yellow lines outside the Thai restaurant.

Since lockdown ended, I sat on the next table to Gillian Taylforth in a gastropub. She's had a lot of work done on her face. Her companion had drunk far too much to drive later but still did.

My friend said Carol Vorderman came to his office for a meeting and her arse implants were troubling her, she was hoping to get them adjusted soon.

Norton Canes

Brain Molko, at a goth night at the Electric Ballroom in Camden. Didn't really know what to say so just blurted "Thanks for the music!". He replied by singing "Thank You for the music", the line in the Abba song.

Kylie Minogue on Camden market. She was tiny, and wearing a voluminous white parka. Mrs Canes shrieked "It's Kylie!!!" and she ran off.

Went to the legendary 20th anniversary Doctor Who exhibition at Longleat in 1982, queued for like two hours to get to the autograph table and when I did it was in the five minutes between Jon Pertwee leaving and Peter Davison turning up so although I got to meet Sarah Sutton and John Leeson I had to wait another thirty-odd years before meeting an actual Doctor Who when Colin Baker (I know) did a PA at Carnforth station.

(I mean a personal appearance - he wasn't just making announcements over the Tannoy)


Quote from: Jockice on September 01, 2021, 09:48:30 AM
That's nothing. I once gave Screaming Lord Sutch directions to Sheffield City Hall. Cynthia Payne was with him at the time.

Good one. I once handed a miserable-looking Gorden Kaye a dry and unappetising chicken drumstick. He was miserable-looking before I handed him the chicken drumstick, which did nothing to improve his demeanour.

Sonny_Jim

Quote from: paruses on August 31, 2021, 08:38:52 PM
Used to live next door to John Kettley. Really nice man.
What about Michael Fish?

My mate collared Paul Scholfield coming out of the stage door after his Dr Doolittle performance in Bristol and tried to get him to autograph his Gordon the Gopher puppet.   We were rather hoping he'd turn beetroot red and start foaming about how he hated the stupid thing, but he was surprisingly down to earth and very funny amiable about it.

Norton Canes

A few other miscellaneous ones from the years we lived in London in that there the 90's...

Nearly ran over Daniella 'This life' Nardini when she crossed the road in front of me as I was on my bike. Nearly crashed myself cycling through Camden and noticed Douglas Adams about to cross the road. ("Why did Douglas Adams cross the road?" seems like it should have a great punchline.) Liam and Leeroy standing outside our flat (by the Underground station) until I played Firestarter really loud. Shaun Hughes a few times, usually in restaurants. Mark Lamarr lurking in various Islington clubs.

Shall I do my Peter Cook anecdote again?


king_tubby

Quote from: Norton Canes on September 01, 2021, 10:41:02 AM
Brain Molko, at a goth night at the Electric Ballroom in Camden. Didn't really know what to say so just blurted "Thanks for the music!". He replied by singing "Thank You for the music", the line in the Abba song.

Wonder if that's the same time I saw him at a goth night at the Electric Ballroom in Camden where he slipped and fell in to a puddle of sick, the same puddle of sick my mate had slipped and fallen in to minutes before.

The Rik Mayall story made me cry. Thanks for sharing it, DrG.

I encountered Jimmy Savile in Otley market once. Wearing ultra short shorts and being fawned over by pensioners. Him, not me.

jobotic

Oh yeah when I was fifteen i had a Staurday job in a corner shop/general store in Whitstable. They used to deliver to Peter Cushing's house and one day he came in to settle up while I was on the floor pricing up the beans. Can't really remember what he said, and I only vaguely knew who he was at the time, but he was very polite and nice.

Norton Canes

Quote from: holyzombiejesus on September 01, 2021, 10:58:24 AM
Yes

Oh go on then

Perhaps just in bullet point form this time


  • 1985, so I was 16
  • After writing to Channel 4, I got a ticket to see their sketch show Who Dares Wins recorded in London
  • Was living in Bolton so had a long coach journey
  • Sat in audience, watched show - special guest that week was Peter Cook
  • Afterwards called taxi to get back to Victoria station - waited in by-now deserted TV studio reception
  • Peter Cook also arrives in reception and likewise calls taxi. For a whole ten minutes we sit there - no-one else, just me and comedy legend Peter Cook. But I'm too young to realise he's a comedy legend so I don't say a word. He leaves.

Sorry, there's no punchline.

Echo Valley 2-6809

Quote from: Sonny_Jim on September 01, 2021, 10:46:36 AM
My mate collared Paul Scholfield coming out of the stage door after his Dr Doolittle performance in Bristol and tried to get him to autograph his Gordon the Gopher puppet.   

Echo Valley 2-6809

Quote from: Utter Shit on September 01, 2021, 09:14:10 AM
I drunkenly waved at Cilla Black during Ladies' Day at Ascot in 2006. She waved back, which I think is definitive proof that her reputation as an awful woman who steals tables that people have reserved is completely undeserved.

She was a diva because her husband told her to be.  https://streamable.com/s9ixmx

Quote from: Sonny_Jim on September 01, 2021, 10:46:36 AM

My mate collared Paul Scholfield coming out of the stage door after his Dr Doolittle performance in Bristol and tried to get him to autograph his Gordon the Gopher puppet. 

Fair play to him for playing along with it but I bet he was a bit miffed to be a world-renowned actor who won an Oscar for his portrayal of Sir Thomas Moore in A Man For All Seasons and to be constantly mistaken for someone who got their break as a children's TV presenter.

Edit. Beaten to it by Echo Valley

Hobo With A Shit Pun

I was once very, very drunk with a mate and bumped into Mark McDonnell of sketch show Velvet  Soup on the streets of Edinburgh. I  quickly started shouting a terrible review he'd recieved from the Daily  Record at him, but ended my rant "which is absolute SHITE the ignorant CUNTS" (or similar) and he warmed to me considerably. So much so that my mate and his partner had to persuade each of us to carry on with our intended destinations, rather than nipping into a nearer bar together.

I also asked him why he'd sunk to playing the computer in lynda La plante's abysmal Killer Net, but he insisted he hadn't. He was right, and I'd been wrongly imagining that was him for years.

I once spilled a lass's drink in a pub, and before I could offer to replace it (putting my own round down and coming back), Simon Munnery had appeared and got her one. Desperado, as it happens.

Jockice

Quote from: Voltan (Man of Steel) on September 01, 2021, 10:41:24 AM
Good one. I once handed a miserable-looking Gorden Kaye a dry and unappetising chicken drumstick. He was miserable-looking before I handed him the chicken drumstick, which did nothing to improve his demeanour.

The ironic thing about the Sutch/Payne meeting was that they were appearing in a charity show at the venue that night, which I was covering for the paper. Yet, they didn't know me from Adam and it was sheer chance that out of all the people in the city centre that afternoon I should be the one they asked for directions. They were about 200 metres from the place. Obviously come out for a wander around while soundchecking or something and lost their bearings.

I didn't tell them who I was though. If Id' given them a bad review they may have murdered me/shagged me.

Norton Canes

Oh yeah and I used to work at a video editing facility opposite the old MTV building in Camden so we'd often see the musos du jour heading in for interviews. Me and a mate once harangued Edwin Collins from an upper storey window for his excessively pointy shoes. He had no idea where the voices were coming from.

Quote from: Jockice on September 01, 2021, 11:22:18 AM
I didn't tell them who I was though. If Id' given them a bad review they may have murdered me/shagged me.

Probably both and in that order.

seepage

Queued behind JoBoxers in the student canteen, confused why they were eating in the student canteen not elsewhere.

jobotic

Simon Munnery bought me a pint once - we both had a Kronenberg.

It was at an Edinburgh show that he had taken to the pub over the road so I was just part of the audience, but we both got to the bar at the same time.

Jerzy Bondov

I saw John Simm and David Morrissey hanging around together, a little boy got their autographs and they signed 'The Master' and 'The Doctor' respectively.
I quickly reminded David Morrissey that he didn't actually play The Doctor, his character Jackson Lake had merely absorbed the memories of The Doctor from a Cyberman infostamp.

I walked past Kevin Eldon on a bridge.

Jockice

Quote from: jobotic on September 01, 2021, 11:35:54 AM
Simon Munnery bought me a pint once - we both had a Kronenberg.

It was at an Edinburgh show that he had taken to the pub over the road so I was just part of the audience, but we both got to the bar at the same time.

I had a similar experience with Martin Stephenson. Again, I was reviewing the show, but again he could have had no way of knowing that.As far as he was knew I was just a fan who was at the bar next to him. And the last time I saw him he came out into the audience and put his hat on the mate sitting next to me.

(He's also friends with a musical cousin of mine (he's in a bluegrass band), but the only time I interviewed Martin I didn't know that, so never mentioned it. I can confirm however that another cousin on the other side of the family was in the band that became The Men They Couldn't Hang. I checked. All that musical talent in the family and it's totally bypassed me.)

Kankurette

Quote from: DrGreggles on September 01, 2021, 09:28:18 AM
It's the summer of 1993, and young Greggles has gone to see the first 'Bottom' live stage show - obviously starring Rik Mayall.

Rik had been my comedy hero since I was about 6 when my Dad let me watch 'The Young Ones', so here I was, over a decade later, with my first chance to see him live - and I was rather excited.

So excited in fact that I had got a train several hours earlier than I needed to (what if there was a delay?!) and had about 3 hours to kill until my mate arrived, so I started wandering around the city centre looking for something to pass the time.

As in pretty much all cities since, I headed towards the market in the hope of there being a record stall and, as I approached, I recognised a man who was buying some fruit.

It was RIK BLOODY MAYALL!

Not wanting to waste this golden opportunity, I walked up to him to tell him how I'd been introduced to his work when I was 6, and how important he was to me, and that he was essentially the reason why I was a comedy fan.

That's what I planned to say anyway...

Instead my voice regressed to a pre-pubescent state, my stutter returned,  and I was only able to utter "Hi Rik, I'm a big fan."

Rik looked at the nervous teenager in front of him, raised an eyebrow, gave (what can only be described as) a Rik Mayall smile, and said "And with good reason!"

I grinned for hours - and still do when I think about it. He'd essentially performed just for me - even though it was only for 5 seconds.

You know when they say "never meet your heroes"? Well, they are wrong.
Awwww!

I have a mate who met Rik a while back and he also had plenty of good things to say about him.

Gurke and Hare

I was once sitting on the upstairs front seat on the 41 bus, and Simon Munnery got on and sat across the aisle from me. He had a pool/snooker cue with him. I also saw him buying toothpaste in Boots in Edinburgh.

I was once in the same group of people meeting in the pub before going to the wrestling as Thom Tuck. We were on nodding acquaintanceship terms after that, but I imagine he forgot about me during lockdown.

I once saw Daley Thompson in the cinema in Nottingham. You know when celebs do that very keeping their heads down low profile trying not to be noticed thing? Well he was the opposite of that, he was being DALEY THOMPSON drawing attention to himself.

I once had a chat with a very drunk Richard Herring[nb]28 minutes past nine in the morning, it was[/nb] in the Pleasance Courtyard, but that's probably true of everyone who's ever been to Edinburgh for the Fringe.

I once saw Super Hans at Alexandra Palace Farmers' Market.

I once stood behind Claire Skinner in a cash machine queue, and she smiled nicely at me after she'd finished.

I once did a wee next to Steve Davis at York races.

Jockice

Quote from: Jockice on September 01, 2021, 11:53:19 AM
I had a similar experience with Martin Stephenson. Again, I was reviewing the show, but again he could have had no way of knowing that.As far as he was knew I was just a fan who was at the bar next to him. And the last time I saw him he came out into the audience and put his hat on the mate sitting next to me.

(He's also friends with a musical cousin of mine (he's in a bluegrass band), but the only time I interviewed Martin I didn't know that, so never mentioned it. I can confirm however that another cousin on the other side of the family was in the band that became The Men They Couldn't Hang. I checked. All that musical talent in the family and it's totally bypassed me.)

And just to annoy people on here I'll add that Martin is the true talent to come out of Kitchenware Records. Sod Smartarse McAloon.

shagatha crustie

Made eye contact with Rick Parfitt sitting outside in a bar somewhere on the Thames.

Annoyed Marc Riley when plastered at an Everything Everything gig.

Saw Bill Nighy walk into Waterstones in Leeds.

Saw Sophie Ellis-Bextor pushing a pram in Waterstones in Chiswick.

My partner saw Thom Yorke in M&S in Oxford (and followed him around, apparently, which I'm sure he loved).

None of these are very interesting or exciting, with possible exception of the Marc Riley one, which makes me cringe too much to relay.

jobotic

I saw Mark Williams rushing across a bridge in London (may have even been London Bridge) in the opposite direction to me, but he wasn't wearing a Birmingham City top and he didn't have a family carrying suitcases with him.

Kankurette

My mum sold Paul Heaton a cake at the Didsbury Festival, and I sat near him in my local veggie cafe once. He was with his wife and kids, so I left him alone.

Fambo Number Mive

Saw Neil Kinnock in Waterstones, just before hearing Tony Benn speak.

Saw Tony Benn twice, in London and Brighton.

Got my book signed by Greg Palast.


GoblinAhFuckScary

i was introduced to the singer from franz ferdinand at a warehouse thing a couple years ago. i was really fucked so kept singing mocking versions of his songs back at him

had a chat with thurston moore a lil while ago and he was much nicer than i expected since we were talking about james chance who i'd also recently met

carried stephen o' malley's (sunn 0)))) bags up to his hotel room

there's plenty of other situations but all i can think of rn is russell haswell gurning his teeth off at me

Kankurette

I shouted "We love you Kevin" at Kevin Pressman when he was goalkeeping coach at Millwall and they were playing Sheffield Wednesday, and he waved to the Wednesday fans as he walked past us. I don't think he heard me though.

Jockice

Quote from: Gurke and Hare on September 01, 2021, 12:08:24 PM
I once saw Daley Thompson in the cinema in Nottingham. You know when celebs do that very keeping their heads down low profile trying not to be noticed thing? Well he was the opposite of that, he was being DALEY THOMPSON drawing attention to himself.

I once did a wee next to Steve Davis at York races.

I was once in a traffic jam on the M62 next to El Hadji Diouf. I knew for certain it was him because he had his name in big letters across the car..

I once had a pee next to Bobby Moore. I mentioned this to a workmate once and he said: "So have I!"  Yeah, but I bet he's never had a pee between two members of Pop Will Eat Itself.