Things You Assume Everybody Else Does

[Sebastian Cobb]

Piss in the shower.

Have shower after shit if ran out of bog roll and need one rather than going to shop.

Did this 5 times the other day, quite inefficient really.

[JesusAndYourBush]

I assume everyone's like me and doesn't use these modern suggested response buttons on Gmail/Outlook for fear of looking like they're lazily using automatic responses

Are those buttons a real thing?  I've only ever seen them on obvious spam messages.  For example one the other day with the message "Hello! My name is Jessica" from a Russian email address and no other text and 3 buttons "Hi, How are you?", "How are you?" and "Hello how are you?" which I'm not going to click because they could do all sorts of untold virusy stuff.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Are those buttons a real thing?  I've only ever seen them on obvious spam messages.  For example one the other day with the message "Hello! My name is Jessica" from a Russian email address and no other text and 3 buttons "Hi, How are you?", "How are you?" and "Hello how are you?" which I'm not going to click because they could do all sorts of untold virusy stuff.

They're added by the email client. I'm sure there may be exploits but gmail/ms do add them and this was just a boring conversation between me and my boss.

[flotemysost]

Cleaning your fingernails using a toothpick.

Nope, I use the point of the nail scissors, or just my other nails. When I haven't just painted them of course. Nail polish hides a multitude of sins.

Maybe I'm the weird one then, for always keeping a scrubbing brush at the side of the bathroom sink for this purpose. Just a cheap one from Poundland or somewhere, though admittedly I'm currently rocking a bougie Body Shop wooden number. Soap and water, good scrub after washing your hands, not necessarily every time but definitely if there's tangible grub there. I have pretty short nails anyway so it's not normally too often.

I remember staying with a friend once and asking if she had a nail brush. "What, you want to paint your nails?" "No no, a nail brush, like in the bathroom, for cleaning under them." She was mystified. And I once lived in a flat where one of the other flatmates had been innocently using my nail brush (in the shared bathroom) to scrub the toilet for weeks until I realised.

Piss in the shower.

Sometimes you don't realise you need to go until you're in the shower and the water's flowing. And when I say you, I mean me.

[Small Man Big Horse]

Race flush when having a piss.

Not all the time, that'd get boring, but I definitely do that on occasion.

I mentioned to my mates once that I never pre-heat the oven and simply add 10 minutes or so onto the cooking time, and they looked at me like I was a madman.

Likewise, and I can't understand why anyone wouldn't.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Maybe I'm the weird one then, for always keeping a scrubbing brush at the side of the bathroom sink for this purpose.

I thought those things were an anachronism my parents still had until I had a builder housemate who also did 'groundwork'. In fairness I borrowed it a couple of times after trying to un-break a car/bike etc.

I suppose this is verging slightly close to minor (funny) outcry on twitter recently where "black twitter" started kicking off after discovering a lot of white people don't bother to wash their legs, or use flannels.

https://twitter.com/search?q=white%20people%20legs
https://twitter.com/search?q=yt%20people%20legs

*looks shifty*

[Jasha]

wanking thread

Cleaning your fingernails using a toothpick.

Unfold a paperclip and use that, then carefully bend it back into shape and replace on someone else's document

[Sebastian Cobb]

Unfold a paperclip and use that, then carefully bend it back into shape and replace on someone else's document

Use a biro then just accept the ink will go away eventually.

[mr. logic]

Wait for my turn to talk in a conversation.

[flotemysost]

I suppose this is verging slightly close to minor (funny) outcry on twitter recently where "black twitter" started kicking off after discovering a lot of white people don't bother to wash their legs, or use flannels.

https://twitter.com/search?q=white%20people%20legs
https://twitter.com/search?q=yt%20people%20legs

*looks shifty*

The flannel thing I can relate to, I also assumed this was a very standard thing to have as part of one's bathroom/washbag arsenal, but I've been laughed at more than once for it.

Also shower caps. I guess a lot of people with poker straight or very short hair or any hair can wash it every day, or at least if it gets damp it won't really change the texture, so the idea of needing to protect your hair from humidity seems alien and my Fifties soap ad getup must look ridiculous.

Tbf if I didn't shave my legs in the shower every day I'm not sure if I'd be making a conscious decision to wash them. CANCELLED

[pigamus]

Pardon my ignorance but why do black people require intensive leg washing and flannel use?

[Sebastian Cobb]

Also shower caps. I guess a lot of people with poker straight or very short hair or any hair can wash it every day, or at least if it gets damp it won't really change the texture, so the idea of needing to protect your hair from humidity seems alien and my Fifties soap ad getup must look ridiculous.

I used to wash my 'short back and sides' hair pretty much every time I went in the shower but now it's down to my shoulders fuck that, even getting the bottom half of it wet is a pain in the arse, never knew how long a pony tail can hold damp either (only do this if i need it out my eyes).

Also learned to wash my hair the day before going out. In fact the way it looks then is the only reason I haven't fucked it off.

[thenoise]

Pardon my ignorance but why do black people require intensive leg washing and flannel use?

Black people don't wash their hair[nb]quite as often. Apparently. They still need to condition though.[/nb]. The plot thickens...

[AllisonSays]

I mentioned to my mates once that I never pre-heat the oven and simply add 10 minutes or so onto the cooking time, and they looked at me like I was a madman.

For the same reason you wait for oil to heat before frying onions; the effect produced is different. Cold oven slowly heating up makes things soggy or crispy or otherwise fucked up. You madman!

[flotemysost]

Black people don't wash their hair[nb]quite as often. Apparently. They still need to condition though.[/nb]. The plot thickens...

Yeah, it's just a different texture and porosity, shampooing too frequently would dry it out. Plus the actual process of washing it is a whole other matter. I have quite curly hair (I'm not black) and that's a pain in the arse enough as it is, the thought of being able to just get up at a normal time in the morning and wash it before going to work like so many people do is a distant dream.

[Sherringford Hovis]

Pardon my ignorance but why do black people require intensive leg washing and flannel use?

Go call a person of colour "Ashy" and they'll explain it to you.

[Ambient Sheep]

I'm white and have always washed my legs.  I'm confused.

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

^ Cultural appropriation bastard

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Race flush when having a piss.

Posts you can sing to the tune of " Cupid" by Sam Cooke ( or " Lost Cat" by Catatonia).

[Barry Admin]

I suppose this is verging slightly close to minor (funny) outcry on twitter recently where "black twitter" started kicking off after discovering a lot of white people don't bother to wash their legs, or use flannels.

https://twitter.com/search?q=white%20people%20legs
https://twitter.com/search?q=yt%20people%20legs

*looks shifty*

I don't really know why, but this very much amused me, in the wee small hours of this morning.

[Blue Jam]

I have pretty short nails anyway so it's not normally too often.

Ah, this probably explains it for me, cheers. I keep my nails very short for werk because the feeling of long nails straining the tips of my nitrile gloves makes my skin crawl, and I also have to wash my hands a lot.

I also like to keep my toenails short because I hate the feeling of toenails straining at my socks.

I am beginning to see a pattern here... never had those long acrylic nails done, don't mind them on other people but if I had them myself I'd probably last ten minutes before wanting to rip them off.

[Sebastian Cobb]

I know long nails are manky but I hate having freshly cut nails, makes it hard to pick anything up.

[Blue Jam]

I hate fresh-cut nails and cannot rest until I have filed all the sharp edges. I don't know how people can use clippers or scissors and not do that. Freshly-cut toenails against socks... *wince*

I don't know how people can bite their nails either. If I have a ragged bit of nail I'll chew it off but I really hate the feeling, it's only marginally preferable to having a sharp bit of nail. Also how do nail-biters peel oranges?

Go call a person of colour "Ashy" and they'll explain it to you.

I'm white AF and also get powdery legs, it just doesn't show up as ashy on my blue-white skin and is instead only visible as a dusting of dead skin cells inside my trouser legs when I take them off after a hard day's shedding. Mmmm, lovely.

I guess people with hairy legs don't get this so much- or do hairy peeps just get leg dandruff instead?

[Sebastian Cobb]

I've got laminate floor and during lockdown and wearing shorts I thought I was malting leg hair but then it got longer and I realised it was my bloody beard.

[Lisa Jesusandmarychain]

Mourns for the rest of their natural life for a sibling who died far too young from this fucking disease that seems hell- bent on decimating us all, and wishing that you could have been a better sibling at the time, whilst being grateful for all the times that the sibling in question actually said " It's ok, bruv ( or...erm...indeed, sis), we were both at fault, let's get on with doing proper family things from this point hereonin, eh?", but knowing that at the same time you're going to be saying " I could have done more" in the same way that Liam Neeson  delivered them lines at the end of " Schindler's List", and knowing full well you'll be muttering those lines to yerself, and metaphorically whipping yourself for that totally avoidable neglect for the rest of your life, until you, yourself, recieve the sweet release of corporeal termination.


Everyone else does this, right? ( well, possibly not Only Child types).

[TrenterPercenter]

I'm waiting for the bloke off Mumsnet to post here - the one that used to wash his cock in the glass on the bedside table.[nb]Although having watched lots of Sean Lock clips recently, this may have been him...[/nb]

"penis beaker"

[Dex Sawash]

Scotchbrite pad is the ticket for post nail trim edge treatment. Make a claw fist and rub your nails in a circle for 10 seconds. Meant for sanding by hand but can also sand your hands.

[holyzombiejesus]

Re black people and washing their hair, when I worked in a children's home we had to buy special shampoo for the Afro Carribbean and dual heritage kids, and staff said they had to go to a stall in the Arndale market to get it. They showed me a diagram in a book once which showed how different 'afro' and 'white' hair was. Was also told they needed to moisturise their skin with cocoa butter to stop it drying out.

[pigamus]

But if your skin is prone to dryness and cracking shouldn't you be washing your legs less rather than more?

[Alberon]

But if your skin is prone to dryness and cracking shouldn't you be washing your legs less rather than more?

Nope, just need to moisturise them after. Like I should but rarely bother.