Author Topic: "Hi guys"  (Read 3961 times)

Glebe

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #60 on: October 03, 2021, 05:00:28 PM »
FUCK OFF CUNT.

New page twat, ffs...

Sebastian Cobb

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pancreas

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #62 on: October 03, 2021, 05:28:21 PM »
Just remind people what time of day.

Morning
Afternoon
Evening

Then add either

M'lady
or
Sirrah.

Sorted.

madhair60

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #63 on: October 03, 2021, 05:31:49 PM »
Just remind people what time of day.

Morning
Afternoon
Evening

Then add either

M'lady
or
Sirrah.

Sorted.

FUCK TIME

BITCH.

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #64 on: October 03, 2021, 05:51:35 PM »
WE HAVIN FOLKS?

Jerzy Bondov

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #65 on: October 03, 2021, 05:54:46 PM »
Son came home in a huff because his teacher has been calling him 'honey' and 'flower'. IM NOT A HONEY he says. My wife's a teacher and she says she calls her students 'chaps' even though she works in a girls school. Fucks sake our future is in the hands of these wasters.

I worked in an office where we ironically started saying 'greetings' as a hello, which obviously then became habitual and not ironic. Now I work somewhere else but can't walk into the office without saying GREETINGS

Glebe

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touchingcloth

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #67 on: October 03, 2021, 06:02:57 PM »
I worked in an office where we ironically started saying 'greetings' as a hello, which obviously then became habitual and not ironic. Now I work somewhere else but can't walk into the office without saying GREETINGS

For some reason the kids in my office don’t say “thank you” but “thanking you”. I don’t know if it’s ironic or what, but I’m sure as shit going to murder them soon.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #68 on: October 03, 2021, 06:03:38 PM »
For some reason the kids in my office don’t say “thank you” but “thanking you”. I don’t know if it’s ironic or what, but I’m sure as shit going to murder them soon.

Oh god just remembered I went through a phase of this. I am so, so sorry.

touchingcloth

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #69 on: October 03, 2021, 06:04:59 PM »
Oh god just remembered I went through a phase of this. I am so, so sorry.

You’ve stopped it now, though, and that’s what counts. Thanking you.

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #70 on: October 03, 2021, 06:09:22 PM »
ASSS'LOUTELY FOLKS

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #71 on: October 03, 2021, 06:18:14 PM »
Right, that's a flight of tasting Sliders, a loaded half shell and a fluid quart o' Guac.

Would you like that all together or just as it comes?

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #72 on: October 03, 2021, 06:28:30 PM »
"Can I just ask if there are any allergies?"

Unbearable.

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #73 on: October 03, 2021, 06:29:47 PM »
ABSLUTELY NO PROBLEM GUYS YEP [claps once]

Mr Banlon

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #74 on: October 03, 2021, 06:36:01 PM »
Weirdly though, I do quite like it in kebab shops when they call me “boss”.
"Yes Boss." Is the standard greeting from non-chain shop and takeaway staff round these parts.

Shoulders?-Stomach!

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #75 on: October 03, 2021, 06:39:31 PM »
"If I can just ask you to pop your card in there"

Scum.

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #76 on: October 03, 2021, 06:44:15 PM »
"Thanks very much, enjoy the rest of your day."

Where will it end

Glebe

  • You must have realism, Spike.
Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #77 on: October 03, 2021, 06:46:29 PM »
"If I can just ask you to pop your card in there"

"What if I refuse?"

"Then I hope you don't enjoy the rest of 'your' day."

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #78 on: October 03, 2021, 06:57:56 PM »
good choice, good chooooooooice

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #79 on: October 03, 2021, 07:21:20 PM »
Alright troops


FerriswheelBueller

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #80 on: October 03, 2021, 07:24:22 PM »
Are you getting “hi! I’m Jake and I’ll be your server today! Any questions about the menu?” yet? Because that’s every fucking meal over here.

It’ll come for you lot if it’s not there already.

Glebe

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #81 on: October 03, 2021, 07:28:48 PM »
"Hi guys, I will be invading your space and patronising you for the rest of the afternoon while Coldplay plays on the speakers, enjoy your meal!"

canadagoose

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #82 on: October 03, 2021, 07:30:39 PM »
Are you getting “hi! I’m Jake and I’ll be your server today! Any questions about the menu?” yet? Because that’s every fucking meal over here.

It’ll come for you lot if it’s not there already.
At chain restaurants that's pretty much par for the course. Same with anywhere vaguely trendy around here.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #83 on: October 03, 2021, 07:31:25 PM »
My secret to success - go to a restaurant where you are manifestly unwelcome and the staff are surly.

They’re there to get paid money, not because they have an abiding passion for customer service, you’re there because you’re lazy and want to eat their slop, not because you’re on a gastronomic quest.

It’s a lot more honest, believe me.

canadagoose

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #84 on: October 03, 2021, 07:32:21 PM »
My secret to success - go to a restaurant where you are manifestly unwelcome and the staff are surly.

They’re there to get paid money, not because they have an abiding passion for customer service, you’re there because you’re lazy and want to eat their slop, not because you’re on a gastronomic quest.

It’s a lot more honest, believe me.
Ach, I reckon I'd hate that. I hate feeling like I'm imposing and I reckon that would just make me want to eat everything quickly and end up with indigestion.

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #85 on: October 03, 2021, 07:33:22 PM »
At chain restaurants that's pretty much par for the course. Same with anywhere vaguely trendy around here.

Yeah fair enough it’s got a reek of chain bullshit doesn’t it?

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #86 on: October 03, 2021, 07:36:36 PM »
Ach, I reckon I'd hate that. I hate feeling like I'm imposing and I reckon that would just make me want to eat everything quickly and end up with indigestion.

Maybe “disinterested” is a better way of putting it. I used to live near koreatown and the place was chock full of tiny dumpling stores lit by fluorescent lights and staffed by bored teenagers who chain-smoked cigarettes by the back door. It was boss, no pretence at all.

“More dumplings (because I am scum) please”
“Ok, but only because I’m being paid to do this”

canadagoose

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #87 on: October 03, 2021, 07:37:55 PM »
Maybe “disinterested” is a better way of putting it. I used to live near koreatown and the place was chock full of tiny dumpling stores lit by fluorescent lights and staffed by bored teenagers who chain-smoked cigarettes by the back door. It was boss, no pretence at all.

“More dumplings (because I am scum) please”
“Ok, but only because I’m being paid to do this”
Yeah, maybe that would be not so bad. Maybe the food would make up for it.

Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #88 on: October 03, 2021, 07:40:37 PM »
My secret to success - go to a restaurant where you are manifestly unwelcome and the staff are surly.

A good French restaurant in Britain will do the job

FerriswheelBueller

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Re: "Hi guys"
« Reply #89 on: October 03, 2021, 07:43:35 PM »
Yeah, maybe that would be not so bad. Maybe the food would make up for it.

The place I’m thinking of was cheap and spicy, much like the clientele. Recommend.

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