The girl with the vaginal smearing

[Johnny Yesno]

Anyway, I don't fear the smell of women. The stinky ones should have a bath, though. That goes for the stinky men too.

[Blue Jam]

Just a friendly reminder that I have a lot of people[nb]Eleven.[/nb] on ignore. If you are one of these people I won't see your replies to me. Cheers.

[Johnny Yesno]

It's okay, I can't smell people over the internet.

[Johnny Yesno]

Time for some music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V00BEZV3jqs

[dissolute ocelot]

fuckin love this dumb brain of mine sometimes.  Swap and swab are two words to try to definitely remember not to mix up in certain circumstances.

I always enjoyed Noel's Multicoloured Swab Shop myself.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Pretty bad time to do a smells exhibit, what with covid messing up people's noses.

[Blue Jam]

Pretty bad time to do a smells exhibit, what with covid messing up people's noses.

Whether that's a joke or not, that's actually a really good point.

[Buelligan]

Pretty bad time to do a smells exhibit, what with covid messing up people's noses.

It's not the smell that changes peoples' minds, it's the thought behind the smell, aah.

[David Pielingtonburygrot]

Ooh, she's here again/The girl with the vaginal smearing in her eyes

[fit bird]

What if you take all the words out of it?  Just think about the ideas using your own words?

Yeah, not bad, snails on drugs & the smell of ants & that.

[TrenterPercenter]

I'd actually challenge you (and anybody else) to tell the difference.

Hmmm possibly a good idea for a gameshow.

[Chollis]

Hmmm possibly a good idea for a gameshow.

https://youtu.be/jl1Zfz-Widc

[Paul Calf]

Reeves and Mortimer to present?

The Smell Of Primary Sexual Organs.

[David Pielingtonburygrot]

Maybe we should consider whether laughing about artists' lifestyles or naughty words is the main thing here.  In this world, that we live in, right now.

Can probably consider this before end of play today, but am a little slammed, so might pass this one onto Gregory in marketing. Should have something ready before CoB.

[Shit Good Nose]

I used to be quite into my fragrances when I could afford it some years ago, and some of the more top-end expensive ones (Czech & Speake No. 88 perhaps being the most famous example) contain a chemical (the name of which I can't remember) that smells like a mixture of body odour, rotting flesh and poo (not our poo, he smells FAR worse).  Now, this chemical is only ever used in VERY VERY small amounts and it gives the fragrance a deep but subtle note of earthy sweetness and a hint of natural human odour (it should be noted that C&S 88 is a unisex scent, and the chemical is used in fragrances for both men and women separately as well).

So if anyone wants to buy into mine and bgmnts' high-end fragrance - Nobarse - then let us know.  (bgmnts - I'll let you decide the price, but no less than £1 per ml yeah?)

[Blue Jam]

I don't know if it's fair to call this artist a "hack" exactly, but this idea certainly isn't half as clever or original as she thinks it is. Come to think of it, this thing of analysing scent molecules and recreating a smell is not unlike Nathan Fielder getting a lab to create "poo-flavor" frozen yogurt.

On second thoughts, Nathan Fielder is quite possibly an actual genius. And "Dumb Starbucks" was technically a work of art. Talent borrows genius steals and all that.

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Hmmm possibly a good idea for a gameshow.

Cock, Muff, Bumhole.

[TrenterPercenter]

I don't know if it's fair to call this artist a "hack" exactly, but this idea certainly isn't half as clever or original as she thinks it is. Come to think of it, this thing of analysing scent molecules and recreating a smell has more in common with Nathan Fielder getting a lab to create "poo-flavor" frozen yogurt.

https://youtu.be/NO8V72pDw1o?t=170


I think it's all fine really; I mean I really don't think men are scared of the smell of vaginas anymore than women are scared of the smell of willies but I get where she is coming from and why not.  I'd go for sure.

[TrenterPercenter]

Cock, Muff, Bumhole.

That is what I was trying to think of!!

[derek stitt]

Would not a Queef machine add to the art, help the volume of the sculpted air reach all parts of the space etc?

No apologies for lack of wit queefs are funny, queefs are silly.

[Blue Jam]

I used to be quite into my fragrances when I could afford it some years ago, and some of the more top-end expensive ones (Czech & Speake No. 88 perhaps being the most famous example) contain a chemical (the name of which I can't remember) that smells like a mixture of body odour, rotting flesh and poo.  Now, this chemical is only ever used in VERY VERY small amounts and it gives the fragrance a deep but subtle note of earthy sweetness and a hint of natural human odour (it should be noted that C&S 88 is a unisex scent, and the chemical is used in fragrances for both men and women separately as well).

I know 88 well, a really well-blended masculine rose scent that works well on both men and women, but I know what you mean about that little "human odour" base note. I once saw it described as "The scent Dracula would wear" and they meant that as a compliment, and I could understand that, a scent for a man of wealth and taste who is a bit dangerous to know. Very nice scent but I don't wear perfume anymore.

Czech & Speake also do a men's fragrance called Cuba which is based on cigars, lime and rum, but also has a definite "faecal note" which is a bit too much for me. Definitely not subtle enough. Nah, not one of their most expertly-blended scents, that one.

Fun fact for all you rose poo fragrance fans: 88 is also Ozzy Osborne's favourite. He's kind of the anti-Dracula though.

So if anyone wants to buy into mine and bgmnts' high-end fragrance - Nobarse - then let us know.  (bgmnts - I'll let you decide the price, but no less than £1 per ml yeah?)

You jest, but...

https://uk.etatlibredorange.com/products/secretions-magnifiques

TL:DR:

Spoiler alert

It's designed to smell like cum

[close]

. I actually had a little vial of it once, it smelled of sea water more than anything. It was actually quite nice but I was afraid to wear it in case it changed on my skin or anyone else could pick up the more

Spoiler alert

semeny

[close]

notes.

[David Pielingtonburygrot]

It's worth revisiting the ever-quotable Lord Denning on this very issue: "If a man is deterred by the smell of a lady's pudenda, he is deemed a misogynist; if indifferent, a ne'er do well; if aroused, a prevert. When the oak is before the ash, then you will only get a splash; when the ash is before the oak, then you may expect a soak"

[Blue Jam]

It's worth revisiting the ever-quotable Lord Denning on this very issue: "If a man is deterred by the smell of a lady's pudenda, he is deemed a misogynist; if indifferent, a ne'er do well; if aroused, a prevert. When the oak is before the ash, then you will only get a splash; when the ash is before the oak, then you may expect a soak"

*paging pijlstaart*

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

What is point aftershave that smells like people? I already smell of person.

It's like making food that tastes of forks.

[Blue Jam]

What is point aftershave that smells like people? I already smell of person.

Depends which person. What if you could smell like Russell Brand or Dean Gaffney? Or this man?

https://youtu.be/owGykVbfgUE

[Huxleys Babkins]

The girl with the vaginal smearing
Behind the hatred, there lies
A murderous desire for love

How can they look into my vag
And still they don't believe me?

[Blue Jam]

I reckon Matt Berry smells of this:

https://img.fragrancex.com/images/products/parent/medium/1501m.jpg

[Huxleys Babkins]

I want to smell of MANDOM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEqA84R0lYU

[TrenterPercenter]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbHVPk2V6_M

[Shit Good Nose]

I know 88 well, a really well-blended masculine rose scent that works well on both men and women, but I know what you mean about that little "human odour" base note. I once saw it described as "The scent Dracula would wear" and they meant that as a compliment, and I could understand that, a scent for a man of wealth and taste who is a bit dangerous to know. Very nice scent but I don't wear perfume anymore.

Czech & Speake also do a men's fragrance called Cuba which is based on cigars, lime and rum, but also has a definite "faecal note" which is a bit too much for me. Definitely not subtle enough. Nah, not one of their most expertly-blended scents, that one.

Fun fact for all you rose poo fragrance fans: 88 is also Ozzy Osborne's favourite. He's kind of the anti-Dracula though.

Cuba was one of my favourites, along with many in the Acqua di Parma line (mind you, Geoffrey Beene's Grey Flannel and Bowling Green, and original Brut [sadly long dead since they completely changed the formula in the late 90s/early 00s] were also among my favourites, so I wasn't always tied to expensive tastes).  I could never smell the shit in Cuba (and no one else could when I had it on either - how it mixes with your own natural scent is a big part of it I think), but I definitely could in the 88 (although, again, no one else could) but it wasn't strong enough to put me off wearing it.

You jest, but...

https://uk.etatlibredorange.com/products/secretions-magnifiques

TL:DR:

Spoiler alert

It's designed to smell like cum

[close]

. I actually had a little vial of it once, it smelled of sea water more than anything. It was actually quite nice but I was afraid to wear it in case it changed on my skin or anyone else could pick up the more

Spoiler alert

semeny

[close]

notes.

If you (the royal you) want to smell of sea water (as opposed to spunk), then Gillette Ocean Blast is about a tenth of the price of that nonsense.  I'm all for high quality expensive fragrances, but not when they're so clearly ridiculous and probably concocted by the same type of pricks that came up with the Icecreamists bollocks.  If you (the royal you) want to smell of spunk, then just cover yourself in spunk I guess.  For free.

What a world we live in!