Author Topic: Cuckolding (NSFW)  (Read 6857 times)

pigamus

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #60 on: October 09, 2021, 08:25:14 AM »
Tetley teafolk rolling up their sleeves and marching into your living room, single file with a look of determination. Phwoar.

Well at least you didn’t say the chimps from the PG Tips ads, that’s something I suppose

Especially after having to hoik that piano up the stairs, goodness me

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #61 on: October 09, 2021, 08:35:35 AM »
Did she refer to your mate as Stan?
Might you be an Oliver if you looked at it from that angle? If you were truly honest with yourself?

Did she look up to you at the point of no return and say "here's another fine mess you've gotten into me"?

Fair play for sharing that :D

I imagine she picked two lads together so that it wasn't too awkward and you didn't feel like you couldn't back out.
Were you alright? You come out of there giggling, with a good story to tell?

This Is great stuff. I like to think that the hubby feller was also cosplaying as James Finlayson, stick on moustache , crossed eyes and that, whilst shaking his fist in your direction ( with his other hand), and pseudo- furiously shouting " Oooh, you pair of blockheads! Why, I oughta...."

Lisa Jesusandmarychain

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #62 on: October 09, 2021, 08:44:32 AM »
I aso had a chance of being a cucker, when I was working in the town of Augustow in Poland, with the bespectacled, severe ( but still quite attractive) looking missus of a feller I knew from me local bar. Got taken back to their flat, and the deal was I had a go on his wife, whilst he and his brother watched.
I backed out of the deal ( I think it was involving the brother in things being the proverbial needle that knacked the camel's back ) . There are other details to this story, but I don't want to go into them, lest I incur the wrath of those posters who always get a bit het up when I indulge in writing this sort of thing, which culminates in their writing damning judgements of my lovely Lisa- like self, and that always makes me laugh sad.

Catalogue of ills

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #63 on: October 09, 2021, 09:04:42 AM »
I aso had a chance of being a cucker, when I was working in the town of Augustow in Poland, with the bespectacled, severe ( but still quite attractive) looking missus of a feller I knew from me local bar. Got taken back to their flat, and the deal was I had a go on his wife, whilst he and his brother watched.
I backed out of the deal ( I think it was involving the brother in things being the proverbial needle that knacked the camel's back )

Bizarre Love Quadrangle

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #64 on: October 09, 2021, 09:08:43 AM »
someone asked me to pump shit into them once

pigamus

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #65 on: October 09, 2021, 09:18:05 AM »
So you bought them a Sky subscription! Thank you, I’m here all week, try the scampi.

mothman

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #66 on: October 09, 2021, 09:22:51 AM »
“Dear CookdandBombd, imagine my surprise when nothing like this ever happened to me and never will. But I’m now going to spout irrelevant bollocks (no change there then) for as long as possible to make this look like a really substantial bit of spoilered text so you think you’re getting an absolutely epic story of sexiness and depravity. Blah blah blah loren ipsum hey nonny no sing cuckoo. And so on and so forth.”

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #67 on: October 09, 2021, 09:25:09 AM »
“Dear CookdandBombd, imagine my surprise when nothing like this ever happened to me and never will. But I’m now going to spout irrelevant bollocks (no change there then) for as long as possible to make this look like a really substantial bit of spoilered text so you think you’re getting an absolutely epic story of sexiness and depravity. Blah blah blah loren ipsum hey nonny no sing cuckoo. And so on and so forth.”

Rob Newman Jarvis voice:  Reading that just turned......me........on.

Poirots BigGarlickyCorpse

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #68 on: October 09, 2021, 10:18:53 AM »
I’d hate the thought of watching someone I love being fucked by another person.
Perennially on the relationship subreddits:

"I (F) agreed to a threesome after my boyfriend (M) moaned about having one for ages, I really enjoyed it but now he's gone all weird and passive-aggressive"

Butchers Blind

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #69 on: October 09, 2021, 11:18:24 AM »
If you were going to get your wife to have sex with another guy so you could get off on it, who would you go for? Choose a big, toned, handsome guy that your other half would really get into with or go for someone who looks like Patton Oswalt?

Chollis

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #70 on: October 09, 2021, 11:26:10 AM »
If you were going to get your wife to have sex with another guy so you could get off on it, who would you go for? Choose a big, toned, handsome guy that your other half would really get into with or go for someone who looks like Patton Oswalt?

her ex-boyfriend?

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #71 on: October 09, 2021, 11:29:08 AM »
If you were going to get your wife to have sex with another guy so you could get off on it, who would you go for? Choose a big, toned, handsome guy that your other half would really get into with or go for someone who looks like Patton Oswalt?

Ban request, Patton Oswalt is a ride.

Ham Bap

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #72 on: October 09, 2021, 12:04:37 PM »
*Edit, Wrong topic

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #73 on: October 09, 2021, 12:06:51 PM »
*Edit, Wrong topic

I read your post before you edited it and I thought, blimey, cuckolding really is a far more complex business than I could ever have imagined...

Ham Bap

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #74 on: October 09, 2021, 12:20:18 PM »
I read your post before you edited it and I thought, blimey, cuckolding really is a far more complex business than I could ever have imagined...

Haha, the perils of having too many tabs open.

I’d hate the thought of watching someone I love being fucked by another person.

Also this x 1 million

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #75 on: October 09, 2021, 12:45:49 PM »
I've got loads of bizarre sex stories, it's just rare I get an opportunity to tell them :)

What a load of bollocks. Who on CaB doesn't enjoy an impromptu bizarre sex story? Spill!

Kelvin

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #76 on: October 09, 2021, 12:54:06 PM »
What a load of bollocks. Who on CaB doesn't enjoy an impromptu bizarre sex story? Spill!

Nah, I'd rather they came about organically from relevant threads. If we ever have a thread about doctor's with explosive diarrhea, though, I'll chip in.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #77 on: October 09, 2021, 12:56:40 PM »
Before cuckholding was invented back in the 2000s I was out one night at some lovely meal with an extended group of friends and stared getting on very well with a couple.  Then as then night went on the lady (some American lady called Brooke) put her hand on my inside leg and said "you should come back to ours" at which point I could then see her fella was also looking at me at caressing said lady.  It was all terribly weird, I managed to kindly refuse which was 100% the right move but I always think that it could have been an interesting experience of a sorts (not sure if this was going to end up as a cuckholding experience or if the lad was going to get in on the action too tbf)

Someone boffin my other half though - no way, god I'm feeling sick just writing it.  Thanks but no thanks.

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #78 on: October 09, 2021, 12:59:42 PM »
Nah, I'd rather they came about organically from relevant threads. If we ever have a thread about doctor's with explosive diarrhea, though, I'll chip in.

Is picking you up on your spelling of diarrhoea sufficiently organic to warrant you not leaving us all hanging?

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #79 on: October 09, 2021, 01:01:11 PM »
Someone boffin scientist my other half though - no way, god I'm feeling sick just writing it.  Thanks but no thanks.

ftfy. There's no need to be all tabloid about this.

Kelvin

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #80 on: October 09, 2021, 01:02:34 PM »
Is picking you up on your spelling of diarrhoea sufficiently organic to warrant you not leaving us all hanging?

I knew it was wrong! I checked google and that was the spelling it gave me!

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #81 on: October 09, 2021, 01:04:02 PM »
AFAIK the term gets used a fair bit in a derogatory sense in incel-type circles. A while back someone posted a link here to a disturbingly bonkers piece by some bloke positing that having a daughter (as a man) must be the ultimate cuckoldry, because you spend years pandering to the needs of a girl/woman, only for another man to eventually enjoy the benefits of your efforts. Fucking bizarre.

And sexist. They don't even consider that they could be raising a boy whose hot knob could be enjoyed by another person down the line.

Incels are fucked in the head. Wait, no they're not, that's why they're incels.

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #82 on: October 09, 2021, 01:05:58 PM »
Is it acceptable for the cuck to get a bit bored after a while and put on the telly and eat a plate of chips?

Only if the big sex man steals and eats the chips, completing the humiliation.

TrenterPercenter

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #83 on: October 09, 2021, 01:10:10 PM »
ftfy. There's no need to be all tabloid about this.

Is boffing even a word? just looked it up and a "boff" is apparently a line in a film/play that elicits a big laugh.  Who knew.

PlanktonSideburns

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #84 on: October 09, 2021, 01:11:35 PM »
Can’t help but imagine John C Reilly as the cuckmaker

Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #85 on: October 09, 2021, 01:24:04 PM »
Well at least you didn’t say the chimps from the PG Tips ads, that’s something I suppose

Especially after having to hoik that piano up the stairs, goodness me

"Dad, do you the piano's on my foot?"
"Shut up, I'm trying to have a monkey wank over here."

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #86 on: October 09, 2021, 01:29:20 PM »
I knew it was wrong! I checked google and that was the spelling it gave me!


It's worse than wrong. It's American. I'm afraid the only way you can redeem yourself is to tell us about the dirty doctor. Sorry, I don't make the rules.

Edit: Oh, I see there's a thread about that very thing. What a coincidence!

Johnny Yesno

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #87 on: October 09, 2021, 01:30:22 PM »
Is boffing even a word?

It is, but boffins are scientists.

non capisco

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #88 on: October 09, 2021, 01:34:33 PM »
Unlike swashbuckler of the carnal arts Kelvin I haven't got a story seeing as I completely wussed out of it when a bloke approached me in a pub in Forest Hill and told me his wife wanted to have sex with me. In fairness he relayed her desires to me in a dispassionate voice that sounded like he was reading a list of colours off a Dulux chart and he was the double, and I mean the double, of Onslow out of 'Keeping Up Appearances.' Don't think I'd have managed to keep the old flagpole[1] straight and true with him sitting in the corner rubbing one out. I'd just have kept thinking "Christ, he really looks like Onslow. Is it Onslow?" Part of me is still wishing I did it for the story, I should have known this would come up on the Cook'd and Bomb'd forum years later and I'd missed the chance to make an interesting contribution.

I saw the same man years later having a go at someone in a newsagent in Honor Oak about the price of Mojo magazine, as if they'd set it. Being cuckolded may take its toll on the soul, or he might just be a dickhead I dunno.
 1. my cock

Buelligan

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Re: Cuckolding (NSFW)
« Reply #89 on: October 09, 2021, 01:49:25 PM »
Is picking you up on your spelling of diarrhoea sufficiently organic to warrant you not leaving us all hanging?

WON'T ANYBODY THINK OF THE FUUUUUUCCCCKING APOSTROPHE[1]S!!1!!!???!!
 1. (')

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