CLASSIC TV FOR BLOKES

[Jemble Fred]

Or, 'do some work for me please'.

I'm putting together a wee package of criticism on a big high street bloke's mag, and I'm trying to argue that a regular 'classic TV moments' boxout would be a good idea. However, it's late in the day and the best I've come up with so far is 'Abusive phonecall to Five Star' and 'Ghostwatch debacle'. Can anyone please give me some classic moments of TV that the likes of Zoo readers would enjoy reading about?

Due to the nature of the mag, the moments can be as obvious as you like, but please help. It may make the magazine readable.

[Purple Tentacle]

The first post here:
http://www.cookdandbombd.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=938

edit: Except my webspace appears to have gone fucky. Balls.

[Jemble Fred]

Ta Comedy ones I can come up with, it's more the 'Judy Finnegan's Tit Flopping Out' type of thing.

Also, can anyone think of any classic wank TV? Camomile Lawn, A Time To Dance, Buddha of Suburbia etc. What was that drama Anna Friel spent most of the time naked in? 'The Warriors'?

[Gazeuse]

The Tribe???

[butnut]

I don't mean to be rude - but what's going on with these journo types? This, and the celebrity affairs thread are both about us doing their work for them.

If any of our ideas are used, can we expect some kind of payment?

[falafel]

One my dad always used to go on about - it might be a little bit older.

Some cookery show, a woman called Fanny Craddock and her husband. They made donuts. And at the end, the husband said to the audience 'I hope all your donuts look like Fanny's". The end. It's a bit shit, I know.

Jarvis Cocker giving MJ the finger on the Brits.

Fuck it.

[gazzyk1ns]

Look at the thread called "anyone watching BBC1 at 10.30" or whatever for some recent famous bloopers, the MOTD one will be good for a shit mag like this, you can say "Imagine having your pint in one hand, yer cock in the other and some bird says that! It would make you spill spunk and Stella!".

The Ollie Reed and... is it Amanda Donohoe? Movie "Castaway" has more nudity than most softcore porns. How about Striptease and Showgirls? Hehe they both have an advantage over Castaway because they'll be in living memory for your readers...

[Ambient Sheep]

Also, can anyone think of any classic wank TV? Camomile Lawn, A Time To Dance, Buddha of Suburbia etc.

Tenko (probably before your time), Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit, and something that nobody remembers called The Egyptians, which one wag described as more reminiscent of BBC producers' weekend parties than Ancient Egypt.

[Jemble Fred]

Great stuff, ta. Butnut - it's just called a little writer's block I'm asking for help on, and I'm not getting paid for doing it anyway matey.

The Tribe, I'll look into that. OANTOF of course... Ta everyone.

[@ssmaster]

Also, can anyone think of any classic wank TV? Camomile Lawn, A Time To Dance, Buddha of Suburbia etc.

Anything done by Dennis Potter. Black Eyes, The Singing Detective and Lipstick on my Collar which starred the gorgeous Louise Germaine, I wonder what happened to her?  Not Karaoke/Cold Lazarus though, very poor on the sex front.

I seem to remember getting horny over The Charmer too, especially Fiona Fullerton.

[JesusAndYourBush]

Similar to the Five Star abusive phonecall, Matt Bianco was also subjected to a similar call on Saturday Superstore.  I believe in this instance the caller called him a wanker.

About 10 - 15 years later he was trying to revive his career and was on whatever BBC1 Saturday morning show was current, and I did consider phoning just to re-create the moment, but I didn't.  I wish I had now.  Would've been hilarious.

[dan dirty ape]

Didn't someone on the old boards actually reveal themselves to be the Matt Bianco caller, or am I thinking of something I dreamt?

[Cambrian Times]

Ok, I know most people hate Bo Selecta on this forum but since we are talking about Lad Mags and Leigh Francis did win a couple of gongs care of Loaded last year, so I think this Oeuvre might be included.

Davina McCall : I would go on (Celebrity BB) if they didn't have a camera in the toilet.

Avid Merrion: That is a shame, I would really love to see you have a shit.

It's Davina's reaction that tops it.

[Ambient Sheep]

Didn't someone on the old boards actually reveal themselves to be the Matt Bianco caller, or am I thinking of something I dreamt?

Now you mention it, they did.  Or at least they claimed to be.