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March 28, 2024, 01:32:26 PM

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Ampsterdam

Started by Crenners, July 02, 2022, 01:51:05 PM

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Crenners

I've got some time lined up on a houseboat. Always assumed it was a bit grubby over there but I heard enough it's a beautiful, inviting, genial place so I'm going just so I can finally decide.

How long could you spend there doing cultural revelry?

I have zero interest in 'space cakes' or 'hardcore prostitution' but I do really like food, drink, museum, gallery, music, film, parks, people.

What should I definitely do or definitely definitely avoid in the place? Is five days too much?

Any recommendations or advice (about this specific topic) would be very much appreciated, as ever.

Many thanks.

shoulders

Must be the 5th CaBber just in the last month to have recently been or talk about going.

Rijksmuseum is excellent, even if the hordes of ipad clutching  tourists around the Night Watch need eliminating. Look, a picture of the picture on a piece of shit! Quite outside of that there are fascinating sections about Dutch colonialism, wonderful Hanseatic era social scenes, really obverse, heterodox pieces too, not just Christ Child after another fucking Christ Child. Portraits in different lighting and poses, dark lingering, anti-commercial stuff as well. Highly recommend.

Anne Frank place is an on-rails tourist hole but on balance still worth doing if you haven't before.

Outside of the Red Light district, Dam square and Rokin it's really not that bad for over-tourism (aside of the hotel prices) although you will find they spoil it to an extent.

Generally you will find the service unbelievably warm and friendly and a good mood and good vibe bursting out of the place. I had such a good weekend there a couple of weeks ago.

The main drawback, a bit like Ireland is the sense of being fleeced and the over-transactional nature of everything. Very little is free and what isn't free is expensive. It is best to simply release yourself from thinking about that. You may not have to on your wallet but I didn't eat out all weekend, just had supermarket scran, fast food and pub snacks to save money. Last time I found the Surinamese places decent value relatively and its an interesting fusion style cuisine.

I'll be in touch about pubs in due course. Please closely adhere to my direction.


Head Gardener

I can recommend the chips with special mayo

oggyraiding

There's a really good zoo easily accessible from the city centre, there's the Van Gogh museum which is really popular, didn't go myself but the Heineken brewery tour is big amongst tourists with shit taste in beverages. Anne Frank museum too but that seems like it wouldn't be fun. To be honest my highlight from 4 days in Amsterdam was the Febo fast food chain where you could get burgers and croquettes from a coin operated mini oven, very futuristic.

Red light district felt very grimy. Not like physically dirty but just the whole thing with the women stood in the windows, and all the pissed up stag do blokes being legends.

pancreas

Quote from: oggyraiding on July 02, 2022, 02:06:50 PMAnne Frank museum too but that seems like it wouldn't be fun.

When I went they were putting on Anne Frank! The Musical. Can't pretend it wasn't a goddamn foot-tapping hoot.

imitationleather

I'm going in September. Gonna just sit indoors and watch the funny foreign telly.

Martin Van Buren Stan

Yeah I loved FEBO but the cheeseburgers are grim. Their milkshakes are ace. I wouldn't recommend the van Gogh museum as it was painfully busy. The other one was slightly less busy. The raw herring is well worth it, highlight of the trip for me.

The city is so expensive that I risked sun burn rather than spend €23 on a small bottle of cream. Beer is v expensive too, a couple of good pubs called De Pilsner Club and De Wetering. They were recommended by an old friend who incidentally turned out to be a massive paedo.

shoulders

The red light district does have a saving grace which is a - I think - free tour run by prostitutes and former prostitutes aimed at informing tourists about the reality, good and bad of the setup and promoting respect and tolerance. As I say, haven't been but it is reportedly excellent. There's an info centre with an acronym I can't quite remember the name of.

In the end, it's a deliberately ramped up idea of a liberal area that's artificially that way to shock tourists who aren't liberal - mostly Americans and British, but many European Catholics too. Most of Netherlands is tolerant and matter of fact in ways we are repressed and scared about but they really are not in themselves a debauched or permissive society, they are really quite NIMBYish and small minded just as we can be sometimes. To come away from Amsterdam thinking the Netherlands is about 1 square mile of it is to be an absolute fucking moron.

Poobum

Is great how Rijksmuseum, Momo, Van Gogh gallery, and Stedelijk are all next to each other. I really enjoyed the free ferries across the IJ. I never got that far away from Leidseplein, but it's a great place to wander about, or sit and watch all the cyclists.

shoulders

Quote from: imitationleather on July 02, 2022, 02:10:54 PMI'm going in September. Gonna just sit indoors and watch the funny foreign telly.

The Dutch tv I have seen is really really boring. 👍

Crenners

Thanks for the repl(ies), I did think I had read something relevant recently but I couldn't remember.

That first description of the vibe and mood is what appeals, as well as the Rijksmuseum.

I'd heard it's pricey, as well. That's part of why we got a place with a small kitchen. Tend to always go for something like that rather than a hotel these days. I like an evening meal out but generally very happy with fruit, yoghurt, jam, porridge, bread, charcuterie, raw veg for breakfast and lunch. I enjoy a cooked meal way more for mostly eating plainer, more nutritious food. Also, leaves more room for space cakes and heroin.

Never had Surinam grub but will defo check that out, sounds interesting.

I'll now read the other replies.

TrenterPercenter

@Crenners dunno been ages since I've been but you should definitely watch this before you go to get you fired up....



imitationleather

Quote from: shoulders on July 02, 2022, 02:19:18 PMThe Dutch tv I have seen is really really boring. 👍

Now I think of it, I can get all the Dutch channels at home through my IPTV subscription.

Guess I'll go out while I'm in there instead. That red light district walk sounds good, ta. 👍

bgmnts

Yeah very cultural and such a chilled out city you could spend weeks there I'm sure. I would have liked to have spent at least a week or 10 days there or so.

Rijksmuseum is great, Anne Frank museum has something about it but is way too touristy, Bilderdijkstrat (forget spelling) is a very nice street.

Basically as soon as you get out central station and go straight you'll see the main streets on the canal with wall to wall cafes (both regular and waccy baccy) and some knocking shops and all that (well I saw a massive fishnetted arse in the window).

Van Gogh museuk looks nice. But yeah it's just a lovely city to Potter about in.

Poobum

Surinamese black pudding, it's lovely.

Quote from: Crenners on July 02, 2022, 01:51:05 PMI have zero interest in 'space cakes'

That's a shame. I think some introspection and empathising would do you the world of good.

House boat sounds like all kinds of fun! Careful with your ludicrously overpriced wanker beers. Don't want you doing a malcolm hardee.

Crenners

I just hope I don't get sea sick 😂😂😂

Quote from: bgmnts on July 02, 2022, 02:34:05 PMYeah very cultural and such a chilled out city you could spend weeks there I'm sure. I would have liked to have spent at least a week or 10 days there or so.
...
But yeah it's just a lovely city to Potter about in.

This sounds very much like what I'm interested in, just twatting around. Looks like loads of good little hole in the wall places for lunch sitting off on a canal, that'll do me.

Martin Van Buren Stan

Just had bitterballen for the first time. Absolute shite!! Might try to surinamese black pudding though.

Martin Van Buren Stan

Also, in for a penny: fuck it. The Rijkmuseum is great but so woke lol. They have art about slavery but never say "slaves", only "enslaved people" and the description of Dutch works are so full of self loathing and empire apologism.

Might be good, might be bad, probably not worth mentioning though!

djtrees

#19
If you can ride a bike, get a bike to ride. I've been a few times over the years for different reasons (none involving prostitutes, honest!) I went in March and for the first time I got a bike. The transport is great, and jumping on trams and trains is really easy, but getting a bike expanded where we were able to think about going. Only a bit hairy right in the centre with cars, trams, people and a billion other bikes. I'd been meaning to go to  Nieuwe Diep Distillery for ages, but getting there on tram felt a bit pointless, but a half hour cycle for a lovely bit of sitting off by a nice pond and drinking posh ale felt lovely.
Also get on the truffles rather than the old mary jane. Then sit in a park for the day, there are loads.
100's of boss pubs as well, getting in before shoulders with my top 5...
WG Cafe
Café de Wetering
Café Gollem
Café Soundgarden
Café Modern
Lovely lovely place. Enjoy

Crenners

Cheers @djtrees and nice to see you around. That sounds bloody great.

Psybro

Will add to the consensus that it's a great place for just sitting around on your arse or wandering aimlessly.  Been for two and three nights and did the Rijksmuseum the first time and Anne Frank House the second, and determined next time I go back it will be to do absolutely fuck all.

Made time for a wander in the Vondelpark last time and glad I did, nothing too different from your standard city park really but just a nice time.

Dex Sawash

gooda if utrekked to

fuckitpost

Quote from: Crenners on July 02, 2022, 04:18:27 PMI just hope I don't get sea sick

Hope you have a lovely time. Stay away from the rough bits!

imitationleather

I'm getting the Eurostar there. It's the only way to travel!!

Not that I've ever been on it before, mind.

bgmnts

Quote from: imitationleather on July 02, 2022, 07:52:36 PMI'm getting the Eurostar there. It's the only way to travel!!

Not that I've ever been on it before, mind.

Comfiest train i've ever been on.

Crenners

Quote from: ImmaculateClump on July 02, 2022, 07:47:53 PMHope you have a lovely time. Stay away from the rough bits!

Cheers, I'll certainly explore and Mrs Cren wants to get baked but I will probably freak the fuck out and pray for death from experience 25 years ago but maybe I'll take to it more now I'm somewhat psychologically robust and prepared to die.

SpiderChrist

Quote from: Crenners on July 02, 2022, 08:00:05 PMCheers, I'll certainly explore and Mrs Cren wants to get baked but I will probably freak the fuck out and pray for death from experience 25 years ago but maybe I'll take to it more now I'm somewhat psychologically robust and prepared to die.

Moaz felafel bar and Greenhouse Namaste. Sorted.

Quote from: Crenners on July 02, 2022, 08:00:05 PMCheers, I'll certainly explore and Mrs Cren wants to get baked but I will probably freak the fuck out and pray for death from experience 25 years ago but maybe I'll take to it more now I'm somewhat psychologically robust and prepared to die.

If you do get curious, my advice would be to get drunk, wait until you get back to the barge and then put the tiniest bit of weed in a one skinner with a ciggy.
It'll just make you feel nicely groggy.

If you haven't touched any for like 25 years, don't trust them when they tell you how much to have. The tiniest little thin line on a one skinner is gonna be enough. Don't overdo it.

If you're with your wife and feeling safe and comfortable and not out in public, you should be alright and you'll probably both have a good laugh and a nice kip :D

You can always roll another, don't jump in at the deep end. It sounds like that's what you might have done last time, and that's just awful.

Joints mixed with baccy are very much the beer of weed. A low dose administered slowly over time. Just smoke it like a regular tab, don't be gulping it down or holding it in or anything.