Tip jar

If you like CaB and wish to support it, you can use PayPal or KoFi. Thank you, and I hope you continue to enjoy the site - Neil.

Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com

Support CaB

Recent

Welcome to Cook'd and Bomb'd. Please login or sign up.

March 28, 2024, 08:56:18 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Captain Tom Moore

Started by weekender, April 15, 2020, 06:15:12 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Jasha

Does she have shares in Yorkshire London gin then?

Quote from: Butchers Blind on December 12, 2021, 05:48:22 PMget up out of your grave you lazy, dead bastard

Matt Bianco have the rewrite in progress right now.

mothman

Quote from: Jasha on January 01, 2022, 12:32:06 PMDoes she have shares in Yorkshire London gin then?
Some of the responses to the Tweet would appear to indicate that.

Ferris

Quote from: king_tubby on December 31, 2021, 09:55:38 PMThe grifting never stops.

https://twitter.com/captaintommoore/status/1476916299854868482

The last step of the recipe being "shake and strain" really made me laugh.

Have to squeeze out every last drop.

jenna appleseed

^ were they talking about their Boxing Day shit?

idunnosomename

Cant find a follow up to this

https://www.itv.com/news/anglia/2021-12-22/family-find-mystery-present-from-captain-tom-to-open-this-christmas

What was it? Lynx Africa? A confession of paedophilic orgies in the Burmese jungle? Shit?

Ferris

You have to sign up to his only fans premium to find out!

Didn't get much media traction so presumably they'll find another one he conveniently hid away Christmas 2022.

...or will they try the same wheeze with his birthday? It would make absolutely no sense ("he must have bought himself a present and hidden it because he was so lithe and sneaky with his Amazon prime account") but I doubt that'll stop them if they sniff some money or media appearances in it.

idunnosomename

Bit narked by that Wales online story about the Hatton IRA bants saying he did laps round "his care home".

Mate. You daughter and son in law's house is not a "care home". Even if it is big enough to be one

Ferris

They must be having meetings "how do we keep him in the media (and the money rolling in)?"

We could celebrate his life right when he dies, then his birthday, then tease his funeral to a media outlet, then do his funeral live with Michael buble! Then his internment, then the anniversary of his walk.

That gets us to December, so then... I dunno, find a Christmas present he "hid" away? And next year; discover his treasure map? A spec script of a children's cartoon he wrote? We have to think of something!

idunnosomename

His "hologram" will be duetting with LadBaby next Christmas

Quote from: idunnosomename on January 02, 2022, 02:10:40 PMHis "hologram" will be duetting with LadBaby next Christmas

I'm imagining the scene from Star Wars, with Luke cleaning R2D2, then triggering him to project a hologram of Tom and the duo, going 'Help us three.  Dough be wantin' for charity.  Help us three.'

Ferris

Speaking of charity dough, the first set of accounts for the captain Tom foundation are due feb 4th, and will be publicly available on the companies house site.

mothman

Quote from: Ferris on January 02, 2022, 01:53:00 PMAnd next year; discover his treasure map?

Grifty Fuckers 2: The Legend Of Moorey's Gold.

Butchers Blind

Quote from: Ferris on January 02, 2022, 01:53:00 PMThey must be having meetings "how do we keep him in the media (and the money rolling in)?"

We could celebrate his life right when he dies, then his birthday, then tease his funeral to a media outlet, then do his funeral live with Michael buble! Then his internment, then the anniversary of his walk.

That gets us to December, so then... I dunno, find a Christmas present he "hid" away? And next year; discover his treasure map? A spec script of a children's cartoon he wrote? We have to think of something!

I'm surprised they didn't dice his carcass up into tiny pieces and flog it online.

Fambo Number Mive

#2444
Sorry, wrong thread.

JamesTC

Quote from: idunnosomename on January 02, 2022, 01:18:10 PMLynx Africa


As if, he'd get them the Lidl cheapo alternative: Cien Kenya


idunnosomename

It's also a gigantic fucking scam, just like Sir Tom himself

JamesTC

Captain Tom walking around the blockchain for the NHS.

Butchers Blind

Coming soon the Cpt Tom Sir Moore vitual experience. Put on the VR headset and you too can experience what it was like for a 99 year old forced to wander round his grounds at the wishes of his daughter.

Ferris

Quote from: Butchers Blind on January 02, 2022, 06:03:29 PMComing soon the Cpt Tom Sir Moore vitual experience. Put on the VR headset and you too can experience what it was like for a 99 year old forced to wander round his grounds at the wishes of his daughter.

"Please - I don't want to ghostwrite an autobiography, or sign 1000s of copies of same to add an extra tenner to the price, or put my face on a gin bottle cynically marketed as 'just in time for Christmas', or fly to Bermuda in the middle of pandemic. I am one hundred years old, can I not just sit down?"

JamesTC


Video Game Fan 2000

Make it around the garden twenty times and you could be the lucky owner of a beautiful Tom's Burmese Days NFT.

H-O-W-L


Jasha

Can't be long till she celebrates marks the first anniversary if him croaking in her own inimitable style

jenna appleseed

Quote from: JamesTC on January 02, 2022, 05:19:33 PMCaptain Tom walking around the blockchain for the NHS.

so that explains the weird phone calls I've been getting from somebody claiming to be "calling from the blockchain" - it was Captain Tom himself trying to escape. Didn't recognise him, he sounded a lot younger.
(turns out the blockchains sounds a lot like a callcentre).

eta: perfect tagline for this thread. It's about the original 'Captain' Tom not this imposter.

touchingcloth



Ferris

What was the tweet in question?

chveik

jfc what a bunch of soft cunts