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The Last CaB post that made you GUFFAW: HAHALLOWEEN III: Shriekin’ of the Witch

Started by The Mollusk, August 23, 2021, 07:16:40 AM

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The Mollusk

*pretends to have not been trying to think of a madhair-level thread title from the moment I woke up today*

Fuck it, post lol

Mr Farenheit

Bill Wyman chat from the Rolling Stones thread

Quote from: imitationleather on August 12, 2021, 07:22:41 PM
Apparently he poured almost his entire fortune in to developing a concept detector that could find hymens.

Quote from: Elderly Sumo Prophecy on August 12, 2021, 07:26:30 PM
The Wyman Hymen Find Em™


Quote from: shiftwork2 on August 23, 2021, 10:49:25 AM
That this appears to have actually come from the phrase 'batting for Britain' makes me want to locate a light fitting so I can swing from it.

Dex Sawash

Quote from: gilbertharding on August 23, 2021, 03:00:52 PM
My favourite bit was when
Spoiler alert
he drove the white lotus into the sea and it turned into a submarine.

Fambo Number Mive

Quote from: Alberon on August 23, 2021, 07:54:53 PM
Having a short break in Shropshire so I was wandering around Ludlow today. They have blue plaques up everywhere but it's mostly just ones from the local council explaining local town history. Dunno what the blue plaque society make of that, but more fool them if they haven't trademarked it.

Did see Alastair McGowen in the flesh as well, but I don't think that counts as he is neither a round blue plaque or able to do a passable impression of one.

Your second paragraph made me laugh as I imagined a blue plague with Alistair McGowen's face.


i like the idea of a blue plague. everyone catches a disease that make them do rude things

Echo Valley 2-6809

^ From the same thread

Quote from: non capisco on August 23, 2021, 11:00:37 PM
There's one in East Dulwich on the road Bon Scott was found dead in a car but it doesn't look official. It says 'Bon Scott 1946-1980 Lead singer and lyricist for AC DC Never Forgotten. Nev'. The official ones don't usually have a bloke called Nev signing off at the end, I don't think. Unless they accidentally started writing 'Never Forgotten' again.

Also it says AC DC, not AC/DC. A pedant's nightmare, walking past that every day. Sort it out, Nev.


Barry Admin

Quote from: Goldentony on August 24, 2021, 07:04:43 AM
how do we patrol intimacy like a Brazilian death squad then what colors the transit van going to be

Quote from: Zetetic on August 24, 2021, 07:12:49 AM
That's very good. Does The Spectator take pitches?


Simple, bindun a hundred times but it made me laugh and I want mah CaB funny updates:

Quote from: Tony Yeboah on August 23, 2021, 07:55:34 PM
I'd like to have a pointless argument please.

Quote from: Pink Gregory on August 23, 2021, 08:02:42 PM
No you wouldn't!



Quote from: Goldentony on August 24, 2021, 05:41:16 PM
if this is good I will fuck my father, this is how confident I am
Spoiler alert
of it being really good


The Rolling Stones thread has now become a Charlie Watts tribute thread, including this gem:
Quote from: badaids on August 24, 2021, 06:01:14 PM
Hey, you, get off a my shroud.

Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on August 25, 2021, 07:41:49 AM

The year is 2017. The location is an exposed clough.
Your groundskeeper is being wassailed for a successful year of ritual grouse slaughter and drainage projects.

Out of the mist runs a poor man, ravaged and bereft....

Between sobs and bodily voids you hear his story. "Drug-gaped and dunted, gobbed on and bunted, belted, cunted, snotwrung and shunted"

You are 'Uncle Festa'. You must solve the Sex Crime that has occurred on your land.

£235 pp
Groups of 6-18 welcome
Meals not included
Accommodation not included
Heating not included
Water not included
Basic shelter not included
Safety not included


Quote from: Shoulders?-Stomach! on August 25, 2021, 10:43:49 AM
I wouldn't stop there, there's a temporal and biological world of fuckdown.

- Roundness of the face
- Itchy lungs
- Jowl redaction
- Peppered alveoli
- Cobbler's Stoop
- Delusions of grandeur
- Henged gait
- Misshapen grogans
- Mingey countenance (not Mangey; see below)
- Zimmerman's Faucet
- Mange of the regions
- Excessive slurping of soup
- Despair and paranoia
- Suicidal thoughts
- Applications for membership of local Freemasons lodge
- Bollock hardness
- Bollock softness
- Excessively middling or mid-par bollock texture
- Headbutting walls and doors
- Monomania and transphobia
- Permanent loss of family and career
- Even pet hates you
- Penury Lice
- Fingal's Leer

"Reminds me I must pop in for some button mushrooms" by Shiftwork 2 in the Nirvana Baby Cock thread.[nb]How the hell do you do cross-thread quoting?[/nb]


Replies From View

Sebastian Cobb

Quote from: idunnosomename on August 23, 2021, 09:02:28 PM
i like the idea of a blue plague. everyone catches a disease that make them do rude things

that's just david cronenberg's shivers there mate.




Quote from: Kankurette on August 26, 2021, 08:44:40 AM
QuoteNuance is a furry animal that runs around in the back garden at night for you, isn't it?

I didn't get it...


Butchers Blind

Quote from: Fr.Bigley on August 26, 2021, 11:04:05 AM
I remember when the Mr porkys logo was a greasy, naked James corden who was being sodomised with a granny Smith apple by an angry butcher. Corden is crying.


Quote from: gilbertharding on August 26, 2021, 10:12:01 AM
I didn't get it...

I believe he is saying Crisps has very little experience of nuance, beyond being dimly aware of its existence.