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The Grand Old Nonce of York: Andy's trial is GO

Started by touchingcloth, January 12, 2022, 02:59:26 PM

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touchingcloth

I don't think we've got a dedicated thread for Andy's chekky noncing, so here's one to save on having to borrow the various Jizz Lane Cunt of Death ones.

His attempt to have the Virginia Giuffre civil case dismissed on the grounds of her out-of-court settlement has been rejected by the judge, so it seems like things are going to go ahead. Andy's options are a) settle out of court and have his reputation ruined (with the CoD also tainted as any settlement money will almost certainly come from her, gifting republicans one of the single biggest argument against the monarchy), or b) have his day in court and face even more reputation-damaging information about the case coming to light there.

What delicious fun. What are your predictions?

imitationleather



bgmnts

I'm sure he'll get punished to the full extent the law allows.

Paul Calf

Key witnesses suddenly losing their enthusiasm for some reason?

shoulders

Whatever happens, don't count on the quality/essence Shame to be a ruling factor in the Royals' decision making.

Captain Z

Quote from: touchingcloth on January 12, 2022, 02:59:26 PMHis attempt to have the Virginia Giuffre civil case dismissed on the grounds of her out-of-court settlement has been rejected by the judge

So that's a nice thing for your attempt to have the case dismissed to be, innit Andy?

monkfromhavana

I'd like to say that the judge's ruling has really got Prince Paedo sweating, but we all know that that's an impossibility.

He's bound to settle by making a payment on a 'without admission of liability' basis. Very much the lesser of two evils at this point, from the House of Windsor's point of view.

Buelligan

Anything.  Literally anything, could be the outcome.  I say this with absolutely certainty based on Nonce Andrew's logic and decision-making abilities - we all saw the film.


Who can kid themselves they can predict what might fall out of this mouth?  Or mind?

SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM SHAVE HIM

TrenterPercenter

We absolutely shouldn't be outsourcing this to the Yanks! We should take back control of this by getting medieval on his ass with a good olde English nonce-testing.

"As the testeth goeth that gent shalt beest roast'd until death on a spiteth, if 't be true that gent dies without reeking then that gent is not a pa'd and his honour is rest'red, but if 't be true that gent doest did sweat pri'r to grave, then that gent shalt beest removede from the spiteth and bumm'd to death by Sir Kilalot from Robot Wars"

Could make a few quid for the country by having it sponsored by Dominos and presented by John Fashanu.


Quote from: Buelligan on January 12, 2022, 03:42:48 PMAnything.  Literally anything, could be the outcome.  I say this with absolutely certainty based on Nonce Andrew's logic and decision-making abilities - we all saw the film.

Not convinced he'll have much input into what happens from here on in. I think he'll be told, in no uncertain terms, what he's going to do, by the grown-ups within the royal family and their advisers.

monkfromhavana

Who would have thought 5 years ago that a Prince would be accused
Spoiler alert
guilty as sin
[close]
of child sex charges to which his alibi would be that he was unable to sweat and that he was in Pizza Express in Woking.

I mean, it blows my mind that it's so ludicrous (the excuse, not a Prince committing the crime) and attempt at an alibi. The fact that he expected people to believe such utter rubbish obviously shows the contempt he has for the public at large. Either that or he is just so out of touch with how normal people think that he thought this would seem utterly normal to them.

I mean, FFS, at least try and get away with it.

Just sent him fifty quid and a voucher for Pizza Hut. I hope all of you have the decency to do the same.

dissolute ocelot

I would hope to see a climax where Andrew in court gives a long impassioned speech about his innocence and the prosecutor then rises and points to the rivers of sweat pouring down his face. Guilty for life! (I know it's a civil case but whatever.)

Isn't the purpose of the Royal Family to entertain us with their wacky antics?

greenman

Rise in the presence of the honorable judge Schwarzenegger...


Butchers Blind

Think there's a lesson for us all here, don't rape underage girls.

pancreas


Ferris

Quiet settlement on the hush hush (with a chekky 'no admission of liability' clause), it's not his money so why would he care? Lawyers, settlements, it's all coming out of someone else's pockets.

A week or two of bad headlines then he's essentially gotten away with it and the man on the omnibus is back to tugging his forelock by March.

touchingcloth

How have I only just realised that "prince" is a portmanteau of prick and nonce?

Famous Mortimer

There is, of course, the possiblity that Guiffre wants her day in court.

Mister Six

What's the rule on this, if he makes an offer? She's asking for $500,000 from the court. If he says "Okay, I'll give you $1 million but you have to sign this NDA that says you can never talk about it again," can she tell him to take a hike? Or if it's just $1 mil (or $100 mil), no strings attached, can she say "No, I want to take this through the courts because the important thing is having all of this seen by a judge and the public"?

EDIT: Famous Mortimer's reply, which came just before mine posted, probably answers my question.

Midas


Alberon

The one downside of the glorious Newsnight interview is that he (probably) knows how badly going to court would go. Not that it's his choice anymore.

His entire lifestyle is bankrolled by the Queen anyway. Sooner she dies and Charles cuts his brother off at the knees the better. Make him live on his Navy pension.

touchingcloth

She could get into an interesting bidding war with the prince and the press. Andy offers £10,000,000 to settle, the press offers £5,000,000 to take it to court, with more cash available if she later agrees to sell her story.

Ferris

NDAs and "no admission of any wrongdoing" clauses can be added to civil settlements. According to wikipedia (where I do all my legal research) 9/10 civil suits of this type end with a settlement and only 2% go to trial because of the financial and emotional cost of going through it all.

The civil suit does mean a lower burden of proof which puts Andy in the shit because the old "can't sweat/woking pizza express" material is laughably weak (although he's stated it publicly now, so maybe he'll have to repeat it in court? Hilarious if so).

The plaintiff may want her day in court, but does she want it enough to turn down a dump truck full of money? Because that's she'll be offered. I hope so, but can't blame her if she takes a payday and the royal embarrassment slopes off.

jamiefairlie

Quote from: Ferris on January 12, 2022, 06:20:42 PMQuiet settlement on the hush hush (with a chekky 'no admission of liability' clause), it's not his money so why would he care? Lawyers, settlements, it's all coming out of someone else's pockets.

A week or two of bad headlines then he's essentially gotten away with it and the man on the omnibus is back to tugging his forelock by March.

Is that what we're calling it these days?

monkfromhavana

I really hope that she turns down the settlement and goes after him, after all he did rape her when she was a child, and really shouldn't be allowed to get away with that just because he can throw his mum's money at it. Then again, maybe she doesn't want to go through it all again, but she (as far as we know) doesn't seem to be showing any signs of it.

A million quid is fuck all in the general scheme of things.