Trump's Georgia Trial: Fanni gaggin' for it.

[pepperweasel]

They won't be chaperoning him while he mingles with other inmates though will they, they'll probably give him his own isolated section. Which tbh he's probably fine with.

Just being told what to do (by people he views as inferior) would probably finish him off anyway. He's spent his whole adult life getting his own way, suddenly he can't click his little fingers and make Big Macs appear.

[El Unicornio, mang]

Trump said he had 'never heard the word "mugshot"' until recently.

Da fuq.

But yeah, 250lbs at least.

[Sebastian Cobb]

Just being told what to do (by people he views as inferior) would probably finish him off anyway. He's spent his whole adult life getting his own way, suddenly he can't click his little fingers and make Big Macs appear.

unfortunately he'll probably end up with a cell like Grouty's.

[Old Nehamkin]

Can someone help me get in touch with Saturday night live, I can write them a hilarious comedy sketch where Trump has to be the president while in prison. I promise I'll make it 8 and a half minutes long for no reason.

[idunnosomename]

Boris Johnson next???????????

[shoulders]

Good job Republicans were so chill about Hunter Biden and Hillary Clinton's emails.

[Paul Calf]

Home detention. Guaranteed.

[druss]

He won't get convicted of anything.

[Pdine]

[PlanktonSideburns]

Spot the Lawrence fox

[Mr Farenheit]

Can anyone map out a plausible best case scenario here?

Best I have is Trump dies. Be nicer if there was a political victory that involved him being sidelined and obsolete though.

Fakes own death, moves to Scotland and wears a fake oxygen mask, calls himself John Thistle, marries Lorraine Kelly.

[Terry Torpid]

I'm surprised he didn't flee to Russia. They'd put him up in some oligarch's mansion, with all the hamburgers and hookers he could manage, and they'd squeeze the last remaining drops of intel out of him. Putin would show him off to the world from time to time, just to stir shit the real American presidents. He could have become the political equivalent of Steven Seagal. Why didn't he flee?

His "Never Surrender" caption on twitter calls to mind big Ian Paisley of "Troubles" fame.

[Cerys]

Why didn't he flee?

Too much of a coward even for that.

[Mr_Simnock]

Imagine this being your teams call first thing.

I wondered why I hadn't seen Kirsty Wark for a while

[frajer]

Twin Peaks: Season 4 shaping up to be even more sinister than The Return.

[The Culture Bunker]

His "Never Surrender" caption on twitter calls to mind big Ian Paisley of "Troubles" fame.

Insert "Orangeman" joke here.

[Jasha]

He'd get Secret Service protection even in prison sadly.

Would they keep their suits and earpieces on or strip off when Trump takes a shower

[jamiefairlie]

I wondered why I hadn't seen Kirsty Wark for a while

She had a nervous breakdown when Salmond wasn't sent down and it ruined her celebration documentary.

[steve98]

One more - Jeffry Clark (Captain Underpants). This silly fuck thought he was gonna become Attorney General. He won't last 5 minutes in the state pen - dead, white-meat walkin' (He looks like he's almost cryin')

[steve98]

Just find a bunk and make yourself at home, Jeff...

[Video Game Fan 2000]

[danwho9]

A CaB throwback:

[Mister Six]

Why didn't he flee?

It took him ages to work up the courage to move out of his shitty Manhattan tower and into the White House (costing the city a fucking fortune in policing, of course). There's no way he's got the gumption to move to an entirely different country for the rest of his life, especially one for which the only semi-decent holiday beaches are in occupied Ukraine, with the war inching closer every day.

[Cerys]

One more - Jeffry Clark (Captain Underpants). This silly fuck thought he was gonna become Attorney General. He won't last 5 minutes in the state pen - dead, white-meat walkin' (He looks like he's almost cryin')

Peregrin Took's let himself go.

[Terry Torpid]

I've just realised the obvious irony of the "Never Surrender" line. He surrendered to law enforcement. That's what the whole thing's about. How did I not spot it straight away?

As reddit democrats always say, "GOP: Gaslight, Obstruct, Project"

[idunnosomename]

Best Ben effort in years. Top marks for the redundant labelling here

[ollyboro]

Can anyone map out a plausible best case scenario here?

Best I have is Trump dies. Be nicer if there was a political victory that involved him being sidelined and obsolete though.

During the trial evidence appears showing Trump on 5th Avenue fucking an aborted foetus IN THE ASS!! Should break his  link with the evangelical lot.

[jobotic]

Nah they wouldn't mind.

The alternative is deranged far-left communist anarchist feminazi race traitors.

[Dex Sawash]

Nah they wouldn't mind.

Miraculous reanimation with magic penis

Edit- can someone knock up a tina toon of this?

[Fambo Number Mive]

Garrison literally misquoting Shakespeare. It would work better if he didn't attribute the misquote to Shakespeare and  just hoped his audience would realise where the original quote was from. Also, Trump's back is to the Sea of Troubles  and he isn't taking up arms against it.