Not walking away when confronted by meatheads.

[buttgammon]

There have been times when I've been prone to flipping the lid with people - particularly during Covid - but I'm so ground down by the general incivility I see on a daily basis that I tend to just ignore people now unless something really needs to be done. The only recent confrontation I've had was with some coked up fuckwit who groped someone on a tram. He shouted, swore and threatened me, so I just said 'you're making an idiot of yourself' and he backed down; he found another likeminded cunt and started moaning about people not being able to mind their own business.

[holyzombiejesus]

I find it worse when I know I'm in the right or have done nothing wrong. That's when I feel frustration at some arsehole and can't ignore their mutterings or filthy looks.

[Sarnie Rudeboy]

I've definitely started biting back a lot. I know I shouldn't.

Most recently a guy with his little kid walked past me and seemingly provoked by my slightly above average hair length (sorry lads), shouted "Why don't you get a haircut, mate!" To which I responded, "WHY DON'T YOU MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS".

He then got mad and started going on about how he was going to beat me up but won't because he was with his daughter.

[TrenterPercenter]

seemingly provoked by my slightly above average hair length (sorry lads), shouted "Why don't you get a haircut, mate!"

[Dr Rock]

No one messes with me because I exude such raw power.

[jamiefairlie]

Both of these are bang on. I've been known to do this stuff, but I try to focus more on just wandering off and getting on with my day now. Best case scenario, you waste time and energy engaging with twats and come up with a good zinger. Worst case scenario, you waste energy and time getting involved in a nasty argument and walk away fuming. Or get punched. Or worse.

Whatever is making someone an aggressive twat isn't going to be cured by an argument with you, and it's not your responsibility to fix it anyway.

These rules don't apply for me when stepping in to help out someone else, mind.

"Whatever is making someone an aggressive twat isn't going to be cured by an argument with you, and it's not your responsibility to fix it anyway."

Well put. People generally massively overestimate their ability (and responsibility) to correct things they see as bad.

[holyzombiejesus]

I'm not doing it to 'correct' anything, I'm just not going to be some passive recipient for their wankery. (I will instead become a bit of a wanker.)

[madhair60]

my attempts to ameliorate such confrontations usually result in my inadvertently exacerbating things

[Claude the Racecar Driving Rockstar Super Sleuth]

Unless the meathead is really spoiling for a fight, I think a reasonably polite retort is fairly harmless. If anything, I'm too averse to confrontations. I'll put up with someone being a tosser until I reach boiling point. I actually got into a physical altercation at the cinema a couple of years ago because this couple were talking throughout the film. I should have politely asked them to stop at the beginning, but instead I stewed in my indignation for about 15 minutes, until my anger overwhelmed my cowardice and I snapped at them to shut up. They needed telling, but my method obviously made things worse.

Thanks to my stony face and pointy eyebrows, I used to hear a lot of, "Cheer up. It might never happen". It's not happened in a long while, but I sort of wish it would. I'd like to see how they would react if I responded by rattling off a long list of horrible things that have already happened.

[Dr Trouser]

Used to do this a fair bit, but now I'm over 50 i just look at them pitifully and laugh.

Worst encounter saw me ending up telling someone to "cunt off you twat" much to the amusement of my wife, who still uses that phrase to this day.

[Doomy Dwyer]

I became embroiled in one of these incidents last week in which I was, unwittingly, the meathead. I was going to the paint shop, which is fucking miles away, to buy some fucking paint so I could do some fucking painting so I was already not in the best of moods. The paint shop is way out of town on an industrial estate and to get there I've got to walk along a narrow path with the sea (nice view) on one side and a railway track on the other. The narrow path is chock-a-block with knobbers on bikes and dog shit (what's the difference, right readers?!?) so you've got to keep your wits about you so I was already in a state of heightened agitation. The highlight of the journey, for me, is the level crossing because I love a level crossing. Whenever I'm at one I like to imagine that I'm a fugitive from a chain gang. To get to the level crossing you've got to cut through a car park and that was where my shame manifested itself. I'm walking along, looking forward to the level crossing, visions of bloodhounds, tobacco chewin' wardens and a silent, mirror shade wearin' rifle totin' sheriff playing in my mind, when a large, shiny 4x4 veered towards me at low speed forcing me to swerve from my chosen trajectory and walk around him. As I was doing so I noticed that the driver, a man in his sixties, was glaring at me in a very aggressive manner so I stopped and glared back. This went on for a while and I worked myself up into some sort of state and began to make a few half-arsed 'you want some of this mate' style gestures and mouthing obscenities to the cunt behind the wheel. He continued to glare and was beginning to look quite apoplectic. His wife, who had a proper Thatcher barnet on the go which wasn't exactly helping matters, laid a hand on her husbands arm to calm the situation which was lucky for him because I'd have blimmed him up big style bruv no lie. Anyway, the standoff continued but was getting a bit boring to be honest. Eventually his wife lowered her window a bit and said "You're standing in front of the ticket machine" which meant nothing to me at first because I'm not a car driving man so my mind is not cluttered by such humdrum mundanities. Eventually the penny dropped and I felt like a proper twat but I styled it out by walking away really slowly like Clint Eastwood in the Unforgiven and smiling in a way that was meant to suggest I'd seen shit that they couldn't even imagine but I was really dying inside.

It was completely out of character for me to behave in such a manner and I'm dill squirming about it a week later. What a prick.     

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

I'm walking away
From the meatheads in my life

[Pranet]

I've definitely started biting back a lot. I know I shouldn't.

Most recently a guy with his little kid walked past me and seemingly provoked by my slightly above average hair length (sorry lads), shouted "Why don't you get a haircut, mate!" To which I responded, "WHY DON'T YOU MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS".

He then got mad and started going on about how he was going to beat me up but won't because he was with his daughter.

Men with long hair still have the ability to blow some people's fucking minds.

I am normally ok when I'm sober. When I'm pissed I can be gobby back, which is ridiculous as a I'm a little fat old man who hasn't had a fight since I was at school. I am quite fortunate never to have got my head kicked in.

Not been to a festival since before covid but I lost my rag at someone every time, the combination of intoxication tiredness and being in close proximity to people for 4 days too much for me. 

[non capisco]

Anyone who's seen my neutral facial expression will probably agree with me when I say it rests on the extreme side of stern. I haven't yet tried to cross any borders using my recently renewed passport but I'm banking on them not letting me in purely because I look so furious in the photo. If someone arrived at your front door with an expression on their face that said "I wish to kill you now" you'd close the door, so let's see in May if I'm whooping it up at Primavera or in a purgatorial holding cell at Barcelona Airport reserved only for the most irate members of the international terrorist community.

This appears to mean either strangers sometimes think I want to fight them when I'm merely schlepping about the place in sweet solitude, or you get variations on that old privacy busting warhorse "Cheer up, mate! It might never happen!". Popular songs about being happy will be sung ironically at me by people I don't recognise. On roughly equal occasions to this I'll see someone's previously happy facial expression drop on seeing me approaching with my sulphurous looking boat, neutral mood accidentally conveyed by a scowling mask of fury that I can't replace. The only solution would be to walk about all the time as if I'm posing for a photo, grinning with my mouth agape like that emetic photo of Boris Johnson, you know the one. The one where he's going "I'm a right laugh, me, mehhhhhhhhh!" I'm not going to be able to keep that up, CaB. No-one could. I also suspect walking around unnaturally beaming like the village idiot would just be swapping one source of negative attention with another.

Any meathead attention comes from that, really. It's eased off over the years and certainly isn't anywhere near as much of a problem as it used to be now I dwell in the arse end of the capital. North Kent, though, when I was a rake thin young whelp that even Syd Little might be able to take in a scuffle. That was a bracing old time.

[popcorn]

Anyone who's seen my neutral facial expression will probably agree with me when I say it rests on the extreme side of stern.

Your expression rests on the extreme side of my fist mate.

👊

[Brass Moustache]

I'm a dick and I always have to give a bit back. It's pathetic and I need to stop doing it, but so far am failing miserably. I don't get aggressive like they do, just insult them or get all snotty.

Was just leaving Sainsburys and a man was pushing his trolley out at the same time as me. For some reason, he took exception to me being within 2ft of him and started staring at me. This was my first chance to de-escalate and ignore him, apologise (for god knows what) or just smile. Instead I asked what was up. He started saying "are you trying to ram me, dickhead?" and this was my second chance to walk away. Instead I gave some back and called him a silly man with anger issues. And so on. No blows were exchanged but it's unedifying and unhealthy, and it happens relatively often. I never instigate it, never threaten violence  but always bite back. I guess my thought process is why should these arseholes be able to say what they like to me/ act unreasonably.

Does this kind of stuff happen to you and how do you respond?

When he said "are you trying to ram me dickhead?" You should have shouted "BEEP BEEP MOTHERFUCKER" while aggressively shunting his trolley spilling as much of his food over the forecourt as possible.

[Stoneage Dinosaurs]

You starting?

Oh no sorry I'll get out of your way thanks sorry

[Stoneage Dinosaurs]

Anyone who's seen my neutral facial expression will probably agree with me when I say it rests on the extreme side of stern. I haven't yet tried to cross any borders using my recently renewed passport but I'm banking on them not letting me in purely because I look so furious in the photo. If someone arrived at your front door with an expression on their face that said "I wish to kill you now" you'd close the door, so let's see in May if I'm whooping it up at Primavera or in a purgatorial holding cell at Barcelona Airport reserved only for the most irate members of the international terrorist community.

This appears to mean either strangers sometimes think I want to fight them when I'm merely schlepping about the place in sweet solitude, or you get variations on that old privacy busting warhorse "Cheer up, mate! It might never happen!". Popular songs about being happy will be sung ironically at me by people I don't recognise. On roughly equal occasions to this I'll see someone's previously happy facial expression drop on seeing me approaching with my sulphurous looking boat, neutral mood accidentally conveyed by a scowling mask of fury that I can't replace. The only solution would be to walk about all the time as if I'm posing for a photo, grinning with my mouth agape like that emetic photo of Boris Johnson, you know the one. The one where he's going "I'm a right laugh, me, mehhhhhhhhh!" I'm not going to be able to keep that up, CaB. No-one could. I also suspect walking around unnaturally beaming like the village idiot would just be swapping one source of negative attention with another.

Any meathead attention comes from that, really. It's eased off over the years and certainly isn't anywhere near as much of a problem as it used to be now I dwell in the arse end of the capital. North Kent, though, when I was a rake thin young whelp that even Syd Little might be able to take in a scuffle. That was a bracing old time.

Yeah I have a touch of the resting bitch face which I've only noticed when looking at any candidly taken photos of me. The fact that I've not typically faced the same kind of reaction you've described is probably due to a combination of 1) growing up in a fairly middle class area bereft of angry fighting men and 2) they all know simply by looking at me that I am a genuine hardcore beef castle who could cunt the bastard shit out of anyone

[Dr Rock]

I've got resting murderer face. And I've done hardly any murdering really.

[hamfist]

I never have these situations because I don't pay attention to people around me, they're just like cows or trees or whatever, just there perceptible but not more than that. So I don't see funny looks, aggressive body language, hear comments or any of that stuff. At the same time I don't notice flirting or whatever it is the sexy ladies do when they take a shine to a boy

[touchingcloth]

I've never been in an actual physical fight. Anyone else?

[PaoloTramezzani]

I never have these situations because I don't pay attention to people around me, they're just like cows or trees or whatever, just there perceptible but not more than that. So I don't see funny looks, aggressive body language, hear comments or any of that stuff. At the same time I don't notice flirting or whatever it is the sexy ladies do when they take a shine to a boy

You don't pay attention to cows or trees?

[Brian Freeze]

It was completely out of character for me to behave in such a manner and I'm dill squirming about it a week later. What a prick.     

Beautifully written thankyou, but she's done you up like a kipper, big time.

She's taken advantage of your wet behind the ears greenhorn lack of car driving to pull the motoring equivalent of "Look! Squirrel!" on you.

Unless it was actually a drive through ticket machine and they didn't need to park up first and then I take it all back and you might have been a tiny bit out of order. On the plus side, they have now got an anecdote to keep them going right to the grave.

[popcorn]

You don't pay attention to cows or trees?

Don't pay attention when sexy cows are flirting??

[Elderly Sumo Prophecy]

I've never been in an actual physical fight. Anyone else?

I was in a couple at primary school. Would you like me to pagger your shit in so you can experience it?

[touchingcloth]

I was in a couple at primary school. Would you like me to pagger your shit in so you can experience it?

Daddy.

[Ferris]

Used to own 2 pistols but the wife/children put paid to that, the bastards. Then again, I'm broadly the happiest and most fulfilled chap on the block so what else could I possibly want? How could I feasibly be happier than I am?

I'll chuck a few words in if someone's taking the piss because I'm not a pushover, but most of the time I just don't care what some unhappy jeb-end says cos I get to say "ok" then go home to my lovely house with my wonderful family.

I'm ludicrously fortunate - the unstable fucker at the shops would kill for what I have and I try to keep that in mind. Apologies for being genuine, I'll be all sarcy and arch in the next thread I promise.

Ok cheers.

[jamiefairlie]

I never have these situations because I don't pay attention to people around me, they're just like cows or trees or whatever, just there perceptible but not more than that. So I don't see funny looks, aggressive body language, hear comments or any of that stuff. At the same time I don't notice flirting or whatever it is the sexy ladies do when they take a shine to a boy

I'm the opposite, I pay excruciating levels of attention to the people around me so I can avoid conflict at all times. I think I picked the skull up drinking in Glasgow pubs in my teens and early 20s, it's like a Begbie alarm that goes off in me long before anyone else notices aggro building.

[Brian Freeze]

Thanks to my stony face and pointy eyebrows,

Have you considered cultivating some moss to soften the edges?

A bit of natural yoghurt is supposed to help start the process.

[Brian Freeze]

I could have stood up to some lads when about 10 or 11 but stood there like a lemon and took some punches to the face and head until the instigator got bored.

I'd been for a walk with my cousin down by the seashore looking for treasure (really as twee as it sounds!) and they were bored and looking for aggro/entertainment and confronted me on the level crossing.

I spent the next five years dodging them round the village and wonder how life would have gone if I'd not been a punchbag. We were outnumbered, maybe not heavily, but at least 2:1.

Need to ask my cousin what he reckons, or if he even remembers it!