Cyber Flashing

[The F Bomb]

I've never sent a picture of my nob to anyone and while I can understand the intent behind the practice, I don't imagine it's a very effective way to connect. I may be naive or misunderstand the real intent. If so, I'm sure someone on here will be able to inform me in a polite and understanding manner. I'm fortunate I got married at a time of relative innocence when online dating was fairly new.

The entire subgenre of nudes seems so reckless to me, especially with various auto cloud storage settings and the like. To be honest, it doesn't excite me in any way to receive a picture of a woman's body parts or naked picture. I like to see someone naked in person but even if I were single, I would find it an unsettling message and I would be primarily concerned for their own well-being and safety, unless it were the first such message they'd ever sent. I would assume they were more mentally unsound even than me. Nevertheless, I'm different to most people.

A man has been charged for cyber flashing a woman and teenage kid via WhatsApp. Is this the end of the dick pic as we don't know it? Hopefully.

Please correct me if I've missed any nuance or if you know better what is what in the world.

[dontpaintyourteeth]

something something won't stand up in court

[AllisonSays]

I think sending a dick pic is less about trying to connect and more about, like, making women feel bad? Shocking them? I'm not sure. Like you I pretty much missed the online dating, send nudes era.

Similarly, asking people to send you nudes seems to me to be more about demanding intimacy (and controlling the expression of that intimacy) than about being titillated, but again, that's based on 2nd hand experience and listening to other people talk about it.

[FeederFan500]

I'm guessing some blokes have found success with it, otherwise there would be no upside to doing it.

Don't know anyone that does it, but then I'm always surprised by those stories about student chat groups that descend into racism and talking about which women deserve to be raped. I'm just too vanilla.

Suppose the Guardian and Radio 4 would find it hard to get people who it works for/on, just as any casual flings are down to Andrew Tate or Neil Strauss, rather than what just happens on nights out around the country.

[AllisonSays]

You think? From unsolicited pictures of their cock and balls? As a bit of a playful, mutual thing someway into a flirtation (online or otherwise), maybe - but the upside of the unsolicited one is really just the upside some guys get from being misogynistically unpleasant to women, surely.

[Milo]

[checkoutgirl]

The heydey was 2005 to 2010 when camera phones and Bluetooth were coming in properly, wasn't it? Blokes sending their bits to strange women in petrol stations. Women were so used to it they barely registered it anymore.

Personally I never received anything or sent anything for that matter. I put that down to several factors like not being a woman, not using Bluetooth ever and not being a common pervert.

It's a mystery why men do this when any comments I've heard about the practice have been universally negative. I suppose it's the updated version of a builder leaning over and shouting at a passing woman. It won't work but maybe it makes him feel better.

[BlodwynPig]

I sent a duck pic to a woman once.

"Have a gander at this" i wrote underneath

[falafel]

I'm guessing some blokes have found success with it, otherwise there would be no upside to doing it.

...said the lemming as he pondered the cliff edge.

Look, it's not like sending someone a photo of your cock is something you can serendipitously stumble upon. Everyone who's ever done it has had a first time. I'd love to know what goes through their minds that first time. After that, I suppose it becomes more and more a reflex. Maybe they set up an album in their phone photos for quicker access. But what are they trying to achieve? It seems like a weird act of violence, like a more perverse version of something an off kilter boy would do, kicking a cat to see what happens or frying ants with a magnifying glass. Sewing a little chaos in the world. Exerting some control in a meaningless life.

[Ron Maels Moustache]

Has to be a power thing, doesn't it? I reckon a large percentage of the freaks who do this are basically getting off on being able to sexually dominate/intimidate a stranger when there's nothing the recipient can do about, which has obviously become considerably more streamlined in an era when technology allows them to do it without even having to put on a grubby mac and hit the streets. Although having said that, I'm sure there also a good portion of confused fellas who think sending photographic evidence that they possess genitalia is guaranteed to get them a shag.

I'm not at all body shy but I couldn't imagine anything more cringingly embarrassing than someone seeing a picture of my bits without having asked for it first.

[druss]

I had proudly never sent a picture of my penis to anyone until 2017 when I was bullied into it. A lady I was seeing at the time sent me a naked photo of herself, which I politely accepted with a "thank you". She then said it was my turn, to which I responded that I had never sent a penis picture and did not really want to. She pointed out that this was unfair. I objected at first but sensing that an argument was brewing I eventually relented and sent my one and only penis picture. I put a sad tear face emoji next to my erect penis as a final protest. Reader, I did not marry her.

[Milo]

Pretty sure my bits have never been photographed. I have photographed a nude lady (with her consent and at her suggestion) but the idea of photographing myself keks off never occurred to us.

[Butchers Blind]

A friend of mine is bombarded with dick pics every day.

She works in a sexual disease clinic.

[madhair60]

A friend of mine is bombarded with dick pics every day.

She works in a sexual disease clinic.

how awful for her

[Imperator Helvetica]

I had proudly never sent a picture of my penis to anyone until 2017 when I was bullied into it. A lady I was seeing at the time sent me a naked photo of herself, which I politely accepted with a "thank you". She then said it was my turn, to which I responded that I had never sent a penis picture and did not really want to. She pointed out that this was unfair. I objected at first but sensing that an argument was brewing I eventually relented and sent my one and only penis picture. I put a sad tear face emoji next to my erect penis as a final protest. Reader, I did not marry her.

I think that's a part of it as well - the 'I showed you mine (unsolicited) so now you should feel obliged to send me something in return.'

All a bit grubby and transactional, like the 'He bought you dinner so you owe him a fumble' mindset.

[Huxleys Babkins]

Modern dating is quite the minefield, so I use this simple rhyme to decide whether or not I should send a pics of my downstairs to a lady.

If "yes please" is the box they'd tick
By all means Whatsapp her your dick
But if they'd rather be left alone
Then please don't send snaps of your bone

[Zero Gravitas]

Post Hog.

[Butchers Blind]

how awful for her

I'm joking, madhair; I don't have any friends.

[madhair60]

I'm joking, madhair; I don't have any friends.

i'm your friend

[Butchers Blind]

i'm your friend

😢

[Brundle-Fly]

JESUS! @Zero Gravitas NSFW Spoilers please next time.

[touchingcloth]

I'm guessing some blokes have found success with it, otherwise there would be no upside to doing it.

How are you defining success? The recipient of the dick pic touching said dick? Because I reckon that it

Has to be a power thing, doesn't it?

I suspect that success is less getting your dick touched, more making a woman uncomfortable. It's like a penis-based Gamergate.

[Dex Sawash]

Spoiler alert

largemargeoffpeeweesbigadventure.gif

[close]

[Phoenix Lazarus]

JESUS! @Zero Gravitas NSFW Spoilers please next time.

Strongly seconded - and I'm not even at work.

[PaulTMA]

Is that what I think it is

[mechanical blood goat]

It's just pigs

[MojoJojo]

Has to be a power thing, doesn't it? I reckon a large percentage of the freaks who do this are basically getting off on being able to sexually dominate/intimidate a stranger when there's nothing the recipient can do about, which has obviously become considerably more streamlined in an era when technology allows them to do it without even having to put on a grubby mac and hit the streets. Although having said that, I'm sure there also a good portion of confused fellas who think sending photographic evidence that they possess genitalia is guaranteed to get them a shag.

Agree with this, but I think it's also about making it a sexual situation. So desperate for any sort of sexual interaction they don't care if it's positive.

[Shaxberd]

I think some blokes resent that women make them feel not in control of themselves. They feel lust apparently out of nowhere and anger that it can't be acted on without the other person's cooperation. Catcalling and unsolicited dick pics make them feel on top of things again, by making their unfulfilled horniness someone else's problem.

[lazyhour]

Phwooar

[FeederFan500]

How are you defining success? The recipient of the dick pic touching said dick? Because I reckon that it

I suspect that success is less getting your dick touched, more making a woman uncomfortable. It's like a penis-based Gamergate.

I don't know if I think it is necessarily a power thing, just a general huhuh she might hate this.

But if you'd asked me if flirting with celebrity women on Twitter as a random worked I'd have said no, of course not. Yet it somehow worked on Melanie Sykes after the same guy had tried assorted other models.

It only needs to work once for someone to make others think it could work for them, and it's a very low level of time and effort needed to play the numbers game.