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March 28, 2024, 05:35:40 PM

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LEGEND GARY PART TWO

Started by Fambo Number Mive, August 28, 2019, 08:17:01 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

Fambo Number Mive

Steak Terry's idea for a sequal - Southampton Airport Shits - enters development.

Glebe

Gary actually did extra work on I.D. 2. He plays both 'Bloke in pool hall who keeps staring directly into camera' (uncredited) and 'Hooligan in fight who keeps laughing then starts attacking cameraman' (uncredited).

Glebe

"I've gotten the biggest turkey ever Daz, and I'm inviting you around for Christmas dinner!"

"That's lovely Gary I'll bring my own food with me though as I have gone vegan."

"That was the wrong thing to say, Daz. They say it is the time of peace and goodwill on Earth to all men, but I think you have earned yourself the kicking of the millennium."

Glebe

Gary attempts to cheer Daz up by emptying a bag of dog food all over him.

Glebe

Gary does a remix of 'Baby Come Back' with lots of unnecessary swearing thrown in.

Glebe

Gary plans to take a New Year break in South Africa.

"Er Gary that's not a great idea."

"Oh ho so the real racist Daz has finally come to the fore! And you're always criticising me about watching old VHS tapes of The Black and White Minstrel Show! Hypocrite!"

Glebe

"I'm looking forward to watching that Get Back thing, Gary."

"The Beatles thing, Daz? Load of old fucking hippie shite. Oasis fucking blow them out of the water."

Glebe

Gary turns Daz into a human spinning top.

shoulders

Legend Gary is building a Frankenstein from tinned meats and Chinese behind the counter products from a wet market.

'They'll shit bricks', he says, knee deep in stinking viscera. 'They'll fucking shit bricks!'

Glebe


Bum Flaps

Gary has drilled a peephole in the side of the mobile breast screening truck.

Glebe

Gary wears a fake beard to look like Conor McGregor.

Glebe

Gary gets into the festive spirit by drowning Daz in egg nog.

Paul Calf

Daz harangues Gary about climate change so Gary decides that Daz has to sleep on the roof all December 'To see how fucking warm you think it's getting'.

Glebe

Quote from: Paul Calf on December 01, 2021, 10:43:44 PMDaz harangues Gary about climate change so Gary decides that Daz has to sleep on the roof all December 'To see how fucking warm you think it's getting'.

Gary hears him rapping on the window at night. "Leave me, spirit!"

Bum Flaps

Gary accidentally discovers that, when mulled, GaryWine acts as a powerful and unarguable laxative.

On a completely unrelated note. Gary has just announced that in order to apologize for a recent post-pub letterbox pissing incident, GaryWineCo will be providing all of the yuletide refreshments for this year's Rotary Club Christmas Dinner.

"It's the least I can do to make up for my errant pissing, Mr Mayor!"

Glebe

Gary makes "exclusive streaming Gary-content" available online. It's just a link to Vocaroo and five minutes of Gary stoned and making 'noises'.

shoulders

Legend Gary has a con going with Santa for Double Presents.

Glebe

Gary celebrates the Winter Solstice by making a Daz snowman and punching it's head in.

dex

The Ledge does a Salt Bae impression with Daz's foot powder straight into his brewing Aldi's own Pot Noodle. "Flash cunts, the pair of 'em." Mutters Gary.

Glebe

Gary advertises his new restaurant, Gary's Restaurant du Posh, as having five Michelin stars.

Glebe

Gary makes his own brand Ovaltine called Gary's Ovaltine. It's just muck and sweetener.

Glebe

Gary starts doing a regular YouTube series called Broken Britain. It takes a humorous look at the state of Britain today, and pulls no punches with its gags about "immragrants, trans and wokes". Gary refuses to give Daz a credit on the show even though the bulk of the material is written by him.

Fambo Number Mive

Gary slips and falls into Carling Stan's arse cock first. At least that's what he told his girlfriend.

Glebe

Gary builds a unique kind of garden hot tub that is fueled by Carling Black Label.

Glebe

Gary is knocking back lighter fluid as he goes round and round on a playground roundabout, "Forget about Ibiza '08 best night ever Daz."

Glebe

Gary gift wraps Daz and posts him to Borneo. "You can help the people milk there sheep and goats and cows Daz. Merry Christmas!"

Glebe

Daz has gotten his own floatation tank and he's having the time of his life!

"Hiya Gary!"

shoulders

Steak Terry notes that ADA is 5.12% up today.

Gary can't make head nor tail of this cryptic currency shit.

"It means three more steaks, Gaz"

Glebe

Shopworn Steve offers Gary and old shoe for £20. "That's a Gucci mate. Barely wore it." Gary is fooled and shells out.